re: Finding job after getting fired. How screwed am I?

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Found out today that I was getting fired from my job due to performance

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Fellatio performance.

Correct. Just looking at number of responses on this thread you can see it resonates with others: either direct experience or someone close

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That’s the thing. I get what you are saying. Do I lie and say “things didn’t work out” or do I say “my performance declined due to some health reason that played a part in my performance but it’s been addressed”/ “I was laid off”

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Hard to say without knowing specifics of your job.. but i can give you an example from my own career, i had one job with the same tenure as yours (2 years)- for me, and this was actually the truth without much embellishment- we had a defective product that caused me to lose a substantial chunk of my business .. this caused my sales numbers to go down dramatically and eventually i left voluntarily.. what I omitted in my interviews was that the job wasn’t a great fit for me anyway, and my manager and i had some conflicts.. but in interviews, i told them “my” truth, which was that the defective product caused me to lose business and lose substantial income.. and it also gave me a chance to say, which again was true- that my #1 customer sat down with me and said ‘Look, I can’t order this product anymore, but i love working with you so maybe we can buy some OTHER products from you “… So it turned a negative into a positive, it made it look like my customers loved me so much that they wanted to find a way to keep working with me despite factors that were out of my control (product defects).. it became a really good go-to talking point in my interviews.. So maybe find something in your job that you did well, despite whatever went wrong- or simply make something up, since as mentioned, the former employer wont talk shite about you for fear of being sued.. Hope that helps .

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That’s the thing. I get what you are saying. Do I lie and say “things didn’t work out” or do I say “my performance declined due to some health reason that played a part in my performance but it’s been addressed”/ “I was laid off”

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I'm quoting this post only as you have had a few that offer different explanations that don't match. Do you actually know what you are doing in auditing or are you still faking it until you make it?

Did you actually have health reasons for a drop in performance? If so, you might have legal issues to look into regarding your firing. If no health issues, why do you mention that, unless you are a liar that might make people consider you untrustworthy? Just asking questions.

I know there is a lot that you don't want to discuss because it might reveal who you are, where you worked and hurt you long term. You need to be honest with yourself on why you were terminated and look deep inside to determine what you can do to better yourself and put your best foot forward.

As an aside. My first job, I was hired because I had a specific skill set. The job I was hired for required two specific skill sets and I didn't have the second to the degree required but my supervisor really need my first skill set. After 9 months he came to me and said you really lack at this skill set and I agreed with him. He gave me two options. Find another job or go and get more training. I picked the second option and audited classes at LSU for a year making my time up showing up early and staying late at work to make up the missed time for classes. It's all possible with will and determination.

Don't make excuses. You know why you were fired. On it and make a determined effort to correct the issues that got you fired.

I've never been "fired", but I was laid off after only 3 months of work at my third job due to a lack of work.

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If i were you, just try to figure out a way to put as enthusiastic and as positive a spin on why things didn’t work out as you can, even if you have to fib your way through it .. most employers love optimism and despise negative Nancys .

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Great advice, do this as well OP.

Practice your interview skills.

Hire for attitude, train for skill.

Just come up with some other plausible story for why you left. Two years isn’t a ridiculously short stint

That said, there is a severe lack of accounting talent out there due to a couple decades of those types of people shifting to tech, so you’ll probably land somewhere reasonably quickly. Horrible market for white collar workers right now though.

I used to litigate disciplinary issues, and at one point expressed ethics concerns about the job…within a week I was placed on an improvement plan and moved into the janitors closet. After wondering WTF just happened, I quickly realized how the turntables.

Moral of the story is an interviewer would never believe the story, so it would be foolish to bring it to their attention.

You were looking for a job when you found that one.

Do it again.

Stop feeling bad about yourself if you did the best you could and it just didn't work out. If you did not do your best, this is an opportunity, not a failure.

The only reason to be down on yourself is if you fail to take advantage of the opportunity to be better, work a better job, and live better.

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Most employers will only give date of hire, date of separation, and rate of pay. Especially big corporate ones. Anything else is asking for a lawsuit.

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This is very accurate, especially if you came from a large company... eligibility for rehire is another question they may ask, but that can easily be beat with a solid reference or two

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My biggest fear is really how to explain this in an interview. In my eyes, the guy that got fired is always behind the guy that didn’t.

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Dude! You didn’t get fired. You moved on from a bad situation. The expectation weren’t realistic and a manager had it out for you. It’s okay to be a little delusionally defensive here.

In all seriousness, no one needs to know you were fired. Just pretend like it was an amicable separation. You got burnt out and needed a break. Now you’re back and looking for better opportunities.