re: father has cancer and it's spreading all over.

quote:

---

Get right with God. Now.

---

I am very sorry to hear this about your father. I will pray for you, your father, and your family.

My grandfather passed away from cancer several years ago. When his end was near, my mother held nothing back. She cared for him, she spent time with him, she talked with him, she told him just how much she loved him, she told him just how good of a father he was to her, she wept with him, she embraced him. My grandfather was a very strong and silent type of man. Yet what my mother did and said to him, with nothing held back, meant everything to him. And it helped my mother as well. She had no regrets.

On the opposite side of this story, my aunt (my mother's sister) was in denial. She did not make any steps to talk sincerely and intimately with my grandfather. She mostly dwelled on the pain and loss that she felt and that she was going through. She could not face such conversations and she was largely unable to assist with any arrangements. They never really had any form of goodbye or honest open discussion. Afterwards, she was consumed with anger and heartbreak. It was difficult, often impossible to be around her. She would lash out at other family members. To this day, she remains a largely angry and bitter person.

A family friend, who is a psychiatrist, told us that failure to have a sincere and honest goodbye, missing that chance to really tell someone just what he or she means to you, often leaves one with immense feelings of regret and anger. It is a serious impediment to the healing process.

This is just a personal story that I have relayed to you with only hope to help you in the journey that you, your father, and your family find yourselves upon. Moreover, do not be afraid to ask your friends for help. And, finally, for yourself in the future, remember: ultimately, life is for living.

May God bless you, your father, and your family.

I will say a prayer for you sir. This is my worst fear in life.

People can live a long time with metastatic prostate cancer.

Hormone therapy (which has many different options in itself), good pain management, chemo, cytostatic diet, palliative radiation or radiopharmaceutical, immunotherapy...

These are all good options. Focus on symptom management and quality of life as this is now treated as a chronic disease. Best of luck and find good oncologists.

quote:

---

Get a good Cancer doctor. If in BR have him go to MBP and get hooked up with Dr. Hanson. Best down to earth, no BS doctor he ever went to. That's what y'all need right now. A doctor that will not fill your heads with false hopes.

---

Dr. Hanson is awesome. He has the greatest demeanor and some of the best patient-doctor interactions I've ever witnessed.

I would also suggest a consultation with Dr. Vince Cataldo. That man might be one of the smartest doctors I know. Seriously. He's a genius. Trained at MD Anderson.

Welcome to my '88-'89.

Cancer sucks.

Sorry for y'all.

I know your pain. Same thing happened with my dad last year. He told me something before he passed and I've taken it to heart.

Some people go in an instant. You can have a heart attack, be killed in a car accident, whatever. Or you can know your time is up ahead of time and make the most of it with your closest family and friends

Spend as much time as you can with your dad. Hope for the best, but assume the worst, since that will motivate you to do as much as you can for him

All I can offer are prayers. I'm sorry that he is going through this as well as your family. Hopefully the advice given from other posters here helps your dad.

I hope you are not alone in having to care and comfort him.

do not come to an impersonal world of 1 and 0's ie a forum.. Go to the darkest quietist corner of your world and seek God's wisdom. Ask him for his hand as you navigate one of the most difficult endeavors any human must engage. God speed to and yours

quote:

---

started as prostate. now.......it's spread to the bones.

---

I have metastatic castrate resistant prostate cancer with bone mets, Gleason 9. I was diagnosed over 5 years ago. My treatments were surgery, radiation, hormone therapy and androgen blockers. I have applied for immunotherapy (provenge). The bone mets were found about 3 years ago. I still work full time and have generally good quality of life. I have been to MD Anderson twice and was told the cancer is incurable, but treatable.

I know of one man who was told the same thing at MDA and now his PSA is undetectable and his doctors can find no cancer. I know of another man with metastatic PCa diagnosed over 10 years ago with a PSA of 3200 and he has been in durable remission for years. I am telling all of this to encourage you and your dad.

The medication I am taking now is working and was not FDA approved until 2014.
There are many effective treatments available. Seek out your local PCa support group.