re: Embarrassing Stuff in your Youth

quote:

---

Me- Just heard this young cat bumping the loudest rap shite in gas station with doors open while pumping gas. I had secondhand embarrassment

---

Was riding with an old hand that worked for my uncle one day and when we stopped to get gas a young brotha pulled up to the pump next to us booming vulgar rap. The old dude with me told him to turn that shite off and the brotha just shrugged his shoulders as he walked in to pay for his gas.

Old dude reached into his car, cut it off, then took the keys and throwed them into the field next to the gas station with a toss Joe Montana would envy.

Rapping.

Was playing city league softball in high school. My buddy came over to pick me up for a game and walked in on me and my girlfriend.

While at bat, I took a strike, then hit a foul ball while trying to send one down first base line. Then, after the defense shifted, I tried to line one down the third base line. I missed. The whole place went silent. The umpire, who was also the PE coach says, "I can't believe you struck out." About that time, my buddy hollers from the dugout, "No more pre-game sex for you!"

There was a lot of laughter and my girlfriend turned beet red.

Driver's side window didn't work and we wanted Taco Bell, so I drove through the drive-thru backwards. Cop pulled in behind us. He wasn't buying my sad broken-window story, so we I turned us around and drove through the right direction. Got about two blocks from my friends house, ready to enjoy some soft tacos, when the blue lights came on. Three Zachary cops, including the canine unit, had nothing better to do than make us sit on the side of the road while they searched my car. That was the fifth time that my car was searched in high school.

Doesn't pay to have the wrong last name in a small town.

7th grade me not knowing what "head" was/is.

I got busted in 2nd grade making out with a classmate out in the wide open.

I got hauled to the principals office for wearing a vest with (dummy) shotgun shells and a hat with the word "shite" on it in 3rd grade.

If college counts... my last fraternity party I decided to go in hot. Downed a RSC full of Jack then chased it with a RSC full of Hot 100 and plenty of beer. I don't remember much from that point until waking up after noon the next day. I've been told I was helped to my bed after sliding down the stairs, breaking my tailbone in the process. It was the last time I did any excessive drinking. In my drunk state I also apparently broke Bro Code by inadvertently telling one of my brother's gf about his side piece (which I still regret doing nearly 25 years later).

I was pretty sheltered...didn't drink/try weed/smoke until college. Didn't realize during pledgeship that when a few of my fraternity brothers talked about "going on a walk" that it was code for going out to smoke weed. At my aunt's funeral last year her [Big Sister]/Little Sister was talking to my wife and mentioned how I was viewed as a "goody two shoes"/acted like my shite didn't stink. In hindsight I now completely understand why my aunt repeatedly told my wife that she was the best thing to happen to me. (I grew up in a solid middle class/"All American" life while my wife grew up one step above homelessness who used sports to get a full D1 scholarship.) We are a truly Ying/Yang couple.

The one thing I look back at fondly (and not embarrassingly) was the last day of junior year in HS. We got out at 11 and most of the fb team (and girls who hung out with us) went to a local city park where there was a picnic area/fire pits/locked cabin. I worked for the city recreation Dept and because I went to a nearby middle school, I knew the resource officer. My job required me to have a master key to all of the department's buildings. So naturally I opened up the cabin which is where we hid the alcohol. About an hour in I see the RO walking towards us. Being one of the few who hadn't touched any alcohol, I headed him off before he got close enough to observe/smell alcohol. We still talk about how screwed we would've been if the administration/coaches (Catholic HS) found out what we were up to. It's the last real HS highlight I have as my life hit a pretty rough patch just over a month later.

quote:

---

Steel “chromies” off car tires

---

:raises hand:

I got busted showing them off at school and was pressured by the principal to narc on my friends. I was in deep shite when I got home.

quote:

---

Trying to dress like Don Johnson from Miami Vice.

---

Didn’t look enough like Don Johnson I assume?

1. Parachute Pants
2. Panama Jack shirts
3. Being one of the last members of Member's Only
4. Break Dancing (I still occasionally break out the robot...on special occasions)