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re: Do you ever feel like you’ve wasted your life?
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:43 pm to SaintlyTiger88
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:43 pm to SaintlyTiger88
Worse.
I feel like I've wasted my wife's life and am setting my kid behind.
Stuck in a job with shitty pay and shitty hours but I'm struggling to change careers. No other industry respects my job experience, no other job in industry would have better hours, and I'm old enough (32) that I can't take a huge paycut for a few years without drastically altering our family's lifestyle. And my wife doesn't want to move for a few years, so I'm fighting everyone else in my same situation in this same small city for the shrinking pool of jobs, just trying to get my foot in somewhere.
I feel like I've wasted my wife's life and am setting my kid behind.
Stuck in a job with shitty pay and shitty hours but I'm struggling to change careers. No other industry respects my job experience, no other job in industry would have better hours, and I'm old enough (32) that I can't take a huge paycut for a few years without drastically altering our family's lifestyle. And my wife doesn't want to move for a few years, so I'm fighting everyone else in my same situation in this same small city for the shrinking pool of jobs, just trying to get my foot in somewhere.
4
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:45 pm to OMLandshark
quote:
I’ve had 2 or 3 nights in the orient where I should have died.
No one uses the term Orient anymore since 1934. That’s how we know you’re a liar.
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:45 pm to SaintlyTiger88
I've got some regrets, but I can't do anything about them now.
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:46 pm to SaintlyTiger88
What do you feel has been a waste? Dumbass decisions are just part of being human. Quit kicking yourself for them. Missed opportunities? Who hasn’t? But how do you know they’d have turned out well for you anyway? Of that you cannot be certain.
Life isn’t a waste if you’re content. You have to define success. But keep in mind, success is a matter of perspective and it’s always evolving.
Life isn’t a waste if you’re content. You have to define success. But keep in mind, success is a matter of perspective and it’s always evolving.
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:46 pm to justaniceguy
quote:
I am in my early 20s and feel that I've lived more than many people twice my age
Honestly that might be true. I feel by 24 I’ve lived more than 90% of the people I know not all of it pleasant. I have felt like this guy before though:
quote:
I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die.
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:46 pm to SaintlyTiger88
I think that’s a pretty natural feeling from time to time
Don’t let it get in your head, though
Don’t let it get in your head, though
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:47 pm to fr33manator
quote:
I’ll be dust someday and no one will remember my name, but the fact that I got a chance to love and be loved in return is better than ignominious eternity.
This, too.
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:48 pm to HailHailtoMichigan!
Still has 30 years left. It’s young!
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:48 pm to oilattorney4lsu
quote:
No one uses the term Orient anymore since 1934. That’s how we know you’re a liar.
Ummm, multiple people here know me on a personal level. They’d call me out if I didn’t live there and travel it extensively. But it is another world and I don’t think the term should die out. I use the orient somewhat sarcastically, but I do like the term.
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:51 pm to OMLandshark
It’s a great term and makes perfect sense, especially when used in tandem with the Occident.
When the traveler left the East he found himself quite disoriented, and found him self in California by occident.
When the traveler left the East he found himself quite disoriented, and found him self in California by occident.
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:51 pm to SaintlyTiger88
quote:
Do you ever feel like you’ve wasted your life?
Nope
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:53 pm to Muthsera
quote:
Worse.
I feel like I've wasted my wife's life and am setting my kid behind.
Stuck in a job with shitty pay and shitty hours but I'm struggling to change careers. No other industry respects my job experience, no other job in industry would have better hours, and I'm old enough (32) that I can't take a huge paycut for a few years without drastically altering our family's lifestyle. And my wife doesn't want to move for a few years, so I'm fighting everyone else in my same situation in this same small city for the shrinking pool of jobs, just trying to get my foot in somewhere.
Keep your head up and do your best, baw. Be the best husband and father you can and everything else will follow. Money isn't everything.
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:53 pm to SaintlyTiger88
At 33, yes. I spent my twenties and early thirties messing around, working in food service, not getting married, not owning a house, poor credit, no kids, etc.
Then I went to law school, got married, started a family. Now, thirty years later, I am successful and happy.
Had I continued on the same track into my sixties, then yes I would feel I wasted my life. But that is also because I felt I had potential to be a damn fine lawyer and family man. The difference for me was making a true commitment to reach my potential and work damn hard to get there, rather than drifting.
Point being, it’s never too late to make the commitment to living a valued life where you reach your potential- especially if it includes commitment to other people beyond yourself. And that is not to diminish people who do something other than law. In food service, I was a cook and server. I was never a chef or waiter because I never committed to it. If you commit, there is awesome potential for growth, achievement and self value in restaurants or any other career. You just have to commit to your career, your family, the people around you, your community and your faith.
Then I went to law school, got married, started a family. Now, thirty years later, I am successful and happy.
Had I continued on the same track into my sixties, then yes I would feel I wasted my life. But that is also because I felt I had potential to be a damn fine lawyer and family man. The difference for me was making a true commitment to reach my potential and work damn hard to get there, rather than drifting.
Point being, it’s never too late to make the commitment to living a valued life where you reach your potential- especially if it includes commitment to other people beyond yourself. And that is not to diminish people who do something other than law. In food service, I was a cook and server. I was never a chef or waiter because I never committed to it. If you commit, there is awesome potential for growth, achievement and self value in restaurants or any other career. You just have to commit to your career, your family, the people around you, your community and your faith.
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:54 pm to Muthsera
quote:
Worse.
I feel like I've wasted my wife's life and am setting my kid behind.
Stuck in a job with shitty pay and shitty hours but I'm struggling to change careers. No other industry respects my job experience, no other job in industry would have better hours, and I'm old enough (32) that I can't take a huge paycut for a few years without drastically altering our family's lifestyle. And my wife doesn't want to move for a few years, so I'm fighting everyone else in my same situation in this same small city for the shrinking pool of jobs, just trying to get my foot in somewhere.
I feel for you. I'm close to retirement myself, but for young people today, I see a fairly bleak future. Automation and liberalism will reduce good paying jobs as time goes by.
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:54 pm to SaintlyTiger88
Yeah I feel down sometimes. Just tell myself it’ll pass and reach for the whiskey and the porn. Start again tomorrow
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:55 pm to fr33manator
quote:
It’s a great term and makes perfect sense, especially when used in tandem with the Occident.
When the traveler left the East he found himself quite disoriented, and found him self in California by occident.
We’ve met before and you know I’ve done it, but there’s something about meeting a Westerner in a seedy oriental bar that really can’t be replicated in this country. It’s why it’s a central point in many fantasy, sci fi, and dramatic movies. You’ve got to be cut from a certain cloth to love that shite and survive it if things go to hell. It’s a wonderful if not threatening environment filled with gambling, smoking, and opium.
This post was edited on 2/23/21 at 6:59 pm
Posted on 2/23/21 at 6:55 pm to notsince98
quote:
I couldn't imagine anyone with kids feeling that way. They change things
No kids yet, but hopefully that happens down the road.
Posted on 2/23/21 at 7:00 pm to SaintlyTiger88
I wasted way too much time. I’m grateful things have come together as well as they have as I get older, but I get very annoyed with myself for the time I spent coasting.
I deal with the feelings by doing what I can now, and focusing on that instead of what I can’t change (recouping lost time). I had a baby at 39. I’m taking steps to improve my job/career opportunities. I’m going to start exercising more. Remind yourself of trite but effective cliches, and get off your arse. “A year from now, you will wish you had started today.”
I deal with the feelings by doing what I can now, and focusing on that instead of what I can’t change (recouping lost time). I had a baby at 39. I’m taking steps to improve my job/career opportunities. I’m going to start exercising more. Remind yourself of trite but effective cliches, and get off your arse. “A year from now, you will wish you had started today.”
This post was edited on 2/23/21 at 7:01 pm
Posted on 2/23/21 at 7:03 pm to OMLandshark
quote:
It’s a wonderful if not threatening environment filled with gambling, smoking, and opium.
It’s dangerous, exotic, intoxicating. You are a stranger in a strange land, filled with foreign scents, foreign flavors. Everything is something you aren’t. The sensation of hearing a hundred conversations buzzing around you and not knowing what’s being said. The thrill of catching a word or two here and there that you know. Trying to communicate in a broken tongue and being lucky to have the favor returned.
There are exotic women to thrill you, their skin, their hair, their smell...everything similar but just not quite.
The customs, the culture, and then like a shipwrecked survivor bobbing in the ocean, being pulled into the raft by someone who speaks the mother tongue, in whatever dialect, is a welcome relief.
I’m honestly a bit jealous of your travels.
Posted on 2/23/21 at 7:04 pm to SaintlyTiger88
quote:
SaintlyTiger88
Life is a crazy balance that I apparently haven't figured out either.
I have put my profession in front of everything, which has been a strain on my marriage, health and mental wellness.
Doing well financially, but I don't think it's worth it to be miserable. Then, I feel like I must to provide for a future family.
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