re: Do you accept Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer as an official reindeer?

Compelling. My 8 year old was discussing this with a friend this weekend. No lie.

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Someone should write a dark short story about the reindeer killing Rudolph out of jealousy.

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It's a start



Rudolph's Last Ride


The North Pole was frosty, as Ms. Claus sipped coffee, and rested her feet on an elf,

Santa checked off his list, as he tallied up gifts, sipping whiskey from off the top shelf,

Outside Rudolph, that diva, that overachiever, wooed does while he strutted his stuff,

But through barn window clear, well the old eight reindeer, watched disgusted, yeah they'd had enough,

Dasher gave out a grunt, "without his nose stunt, he'd be nothing, a loser, a shame."

Dancer nodded, "It's true. It was US they all knew. And WE started this whole reindeer game."

Comet crowed, "And that fog? You can just read my blog, made by government chemtrails you know."

Cupid chimed in, "Convenient, his nose just starts gleamin', when "clouds" grow as thick as the snow."

Blitzen, accent German, said, "Zat buck is vermin, und vill put us out of a job."

Prancer claimed, "Be a shame, if an accident came." With a gesture suggesting the mob,

Then Vixen spoke up, with voice more than gruff, "It's agreed, something's gotta be done."

They all looked at Donner, the sire of dishonor, who quipped, "Doubt he's even my son."

"My doe sure disappears, when we fly every year, who she visits? It surely ain't Jesus."

Just then into the light, stepped a gnome with a knife, "Seems we've all got a problem." Said Breesus.

So...uh...Breesus? I did a bad thing. I've taken your prompt and turned it into gore filled Christmas-noir revenge tale.

Rudolph the five legged reindeer was superior.

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Rankin-Bass was awesome, but how were those holiday specials?

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I still can't believe some worker lady made off with all the Rudolph puppets and ruined them in her attic.