- My Forums
- Tiger Rant
- LSU Recruiting
- SEC Rant
- Saints Talk
- Pelicans Talk
- More Sports Board
- Fantasy Sports
- Golf Board
- Soccer Board
- O-T Lounge
- Tech Board
- Home/Garden Board
- Outdoor Board
- Health/Fitness Board
- Movie/TV Board
- Book Board
- Music Board
- Political Talk
- Money Talk
- Fark Board
- Gaming Board
- Travel Board
- Food/Drink Board
- Ticket Exchange
- TD Help Board
Customize My Forums- View All Forums
- Show Left Links
- Topic Sort Options
- Trending Topics
- Recent Topics
- Active Topics
Started By
Message
re: Divoced baws of the OT. How did it go down?
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:22 am to pcolatiger28
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:22 am to pcolatiger28
quote:
Marriage is a covenant before god and made in front of your family and friends. Maybe people should understand what marriage really is before moving forward. If you’re not willing to work through hard times, sickness and in health, rich or poor, then don’t get married. You’re miserable and not happy, work it out and honor your covenant.
Oh wow, it's that easy? Well frick, you should let everyone know this info.
1
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:23 am to fightin tigers
quote:
Sounds like the pray away the gay type mentality.
It's simply nature, how we are built. Fight it all you want as some sort of moral punishment of denying yourself.
To those with just a tad bit of intellect and character, their desires go well beyond their "natural physical desires".
Let me explain it to you in a way that you might be able to understand. I like donuts. I don't eat them all of the time. The reason I don't is because, overall, I don't want to...even though my pure physical desire is to eat them.
Many people aren't controlled by their superficial desires. They instead choose a much more rewarding, albeit less instantly gratifying, path.
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:23 am to Bunk Moreland
Started with me working and her in undergrad. Then switched to her working and me in law school.
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:24 am to Bunk Moreland
quote:
But, I think there is a contingent of professional women who want to live the Sex and the City lifestyle after they have knocked out their kids.
I’ wonder how delaying marriage into your 30s and whatnot plays into this
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:25 am to moneyg
quote:
I like donuts. I don't eat them all of the time.
Um, exactly. Monogamy is all the time. You will never have a donut again.
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:25 am to fightin tigers
For some reason this subject fascinates me and I’ve thought about it quite a bit. I’m 44, been married happily for nearly 18 years, 2 kids and overall we are both very content with our life together. In looking at the issue among my circle of friends …15 people from high school and college that are still (at least somewhat) part of my life. Of those 15, all range in age from 42 to 46, we all married somewhere between 24 and 30 and every single one of us currently has children. Of the 15, only 3 divorced: one was the result of the husband cheating, the other 2 were the result of the man making very poor choices on who they married (one married a certifiably crazy alpha female and the other married an entitled woman with zero personality and a drinking problem who didn’t want kids). Warning signs were there in both instances. Those marriages ended quickly and both are remarried with children and seem happy. Of the 15, the only one unmarried at this time is the husband who cheated and who now runs around with a bunch of young girls, while his former wife is remarried.
So, in my circle at least, there are a fairly high percentage of happy, functioning marriages. Common themes among us are that we are all college (and/or graduate school) educated, none of the women have tattoos (at least that I know about), no one smokes, almost all (husbands and wives) are involved in their children’s lives and their home life, all come from families that were/are at least nominally Christian/Catholic. And I’m not talking about a group of prudes from overly religious upbringings, in fact out of the group, the majority are areligious/agnostic, the point is that the underlying morality is there.
When the two partners to the marriage aren’t moral and committed, if they don’t have virtue and integrity, then they will default back to their base, biological mode (men like physically attractive, vibrant women and women like high status, established provider/protectors). If one side isn’t providing the base level needs of the other, the healthy response is to talk about and work on the marriage, so that growth can occur and everyone is better off…the trashy response is to use it as an excuse to exit the responsibilities of the marriage. Most divorce could be avoided if people just made better decisions about who it is they marry, if your BF or GF is trashy, then they are going to do trashy things. You can't be shocked or surprised by it.
So, in my circle at least, there are a fairly high percentage of happy, functioning marriages. Common themes among us are that we are all college (and/or graduate school) educated, none of the women have tattoos (at least that I know about), no one smokes, almost all (husbands and wives) are involved in their children’s lives and their home life, all come from families that were/are at least nominally Christian/Catholic. And I’m not talking about a group of prudes from overly religious upbringings, in fact out of the group, the majority are areligious/agnostic, the point is that the underlying morality is there.
When the two partners to the marriage aren’t moral and committed, if they don’t have virtue and integrity, then they will default back to their base, biological mode (men like physically attractive, vibrant women and women like high status, established provider/protectors). If one side isn’t providing the base level needs of the other, the healthy response is to talk about and work on the marriage, so that growth can occur and everyone is better off…the trashy response is to use it as an excuse to exit the responsibilities of the marriage. Most divorce could be avoided if people just made better decisions about who it is they marry, if your BF or GF is trashy, then they are going to do trashy things. You can't be shocked or surprised by it.
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:29 am to Bunk Moreland
quote:
But, I think there is a contingent of professional women who want to live the Sex and the City
In med school dated one of the nurses for almost a year, i was 24, she was 22. I shite you not she ended it by saying “I love you and could see myself marrying you but Ive been watching sex and the city lately and feel like i need to explore myself and my sexuality more before settling down.”
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:30 am to Romney Wordsworth
And you may be surprised how many of those marriages end when the kids turn 18.
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:32 am to Cosmo
I knew I was in trouble the day I watched my ex-wife make herself fake cry.
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:35 am to Cosmo
No one has taken the divorce plunge from my group yet, but the usual song and dance for early divorcees is getting married too young, most times involving a kid.
No one should ever get married before the age of 25. Hell probably closer to 30, once your brain goes through the last big maturity push.
No one should ever get married before the age of 25. Hell probably closer to 30, once your brain goes through the last big maturity push.
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:38 am to The Pirate King
quote:
No one has taken the divorce plunge from my group yet, but the usual song and dance for early divorcees is getting married too young, most times involving a kid.
Only one of the 20 or so circle of friends has gotten divorced. He married an immature selfish woman. We all knew it wasn't going to work. They only lasted a year and thankfully they didn't have kids.
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:39 am to lsu777
quote:
Biggest problem, is people are marrying pieces of shite a d then expect it to work. Stop choosing shitty partners based on looks only and ignoring all of the red flags.
For the record, women do this shite all of the time, maybe more than men. They marry the cool guy who like ryno said, spends night and day away from the house. The guy was doing the same shite when they were dating but she thought she could change him. Wrong.
Men marry women that go out with girl friends every weekend while they are dating and are suddenly surprised when they starting banging a baw on the side.
I only have one divorced close friend and they still love each other but she is an alcoholic and addicted to gambling. It was justified as her whole family is alcoholics and she refused treatment or counseling. He knew this shite going in, now he bitches about the child support.
The other friends I have that are divorced....the women was cheating. Both guys are great guys. One ignored tons of signs that she was crazy before they were married. But she got on antidepressants and he should have ran then, he didn't until he caught her cheating the third time.
The other....he was working16 hours a day then took a job out of town. She is a nurse so you can imagine what happened next. But she had a history of commitment issues and had been engaged twice previously. He thought the five kids in 8 years would solve this. She was always on his case to get a better job so she could have nicer things etc.
I was the only that called it in both cases and was lectured by the other wives about how I was wrong. Eventually they saw the light.
Lesson is stop choosing terrible partners.
This post was edited on 2/17/20 at 10:41 am
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:40 am to Cosmo
not sure how to relate to this thread as a single 26 year old
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:40 am to pcolatiger28
I’m 6 months in to this separation.
Past year or two has been bad, there’s some alcohol And prescription issues on her part.
Sucks and I hate it. My wife filed for divorce, but yet acts half the time like it’s just a formality or an attention getter so to speak.
I honestly believe she lives from day to day not thinking about bigger picture.
Make matters worse it’s stating to get into my pocket on a monthly basis being as she isn’t contributing for any of our household monthly bills.
Her best friend is an attorney so it didn’t cost her anything to file and so far hasnt cost me anything.
I don’t want a divorce. We have 3 kids and for the most part we love each other.
I don’t want to start over either.
She’s become very selfish past year or two, luckily though I get kids most of the time. I don’t understand how a woman loses her motherly intuition?
I just don’t get that.
As many others here have said many many
Times people make decisions like this only to have time pass and them realize grass wasn’t greener.
I often wish she were cheating, it would make it easier for me to move on.
I found a marriage class online that’s pretty expensive, it’s a 3 day workshop. I feel like this is my last attempt to reconcile. She surprisingly agreed to want to go.
I’m not angry at her anymore. I’m just tired of living my life like this.
It consumes your brain and thoughts.
It’s affected me mentally, emotionally and physically.
I’m 40, been in this for 10 years. I hope this class helps us, but at least lll know I did all I could do to save things if it doesnt.
Good luck to everybody on a similar situation.
It’s sucks, but time heals most things is how I look at it, one way or the other.
Past year or two has been bad, there’s some alcohol And prescription issues on her part.
Sucks and I hate it. My wife filed for divorce, but yet acts half the time like it’s just a formality or an attention getter so to speak.
I honestly believe she lives from day to day not thinking about bigger picture.
Make matters worse it’s stating to get into my pocket on a monthly basis being as she isn’t contributing for any of our household monthly bills.
Her best friend is an attorney so it didn’t cost her anything to file and so far hasnt cost me anything.
I don’t want a divorce. We have 3 kids and for the most part we love each other.
I don’t want to start over either.
She’s become very selfish past year or two, luckily though I get kids most of the time. I don’t understand how a woman loses her motherly intuition?
I just don’t get that.
As many others here have said many many
Times people make decisions like this only to have time pass and them realize grass wasn’t greener.
I often wish she were cheating, it would make it easier for me to move on.
I found a marriage class online that’s pretty expensive, it’s a 3 day workshop. I feel like this is my last attempt to reconcile. She surprisingly agreed to want to go.
I’m not angry at her anymore. I’m just tired of living my life like this.
It consumes your brain and thoughts.
It’s affected me mentally, emotionally and physically.
I’m 40, been in this for 10 years. I hope this class helps us, but at least lll know I did all I could do to save things if it doesnt.
Good luck to everybody on a similar situation.
It’s sucks, but time heals most things is how I look at it, one way or the other.
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:41 am to Cosmo
quote:
In med school dated one of the nurses for almost a year, i was 24, she was 22. I shite you not she ended it by saying “I love you and could see myself marrying you but Ive been watching sex and the city lately and feel like i need to explore myself and my sexuality more before settling down.”
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:41 am to lsu777
quote:
But she had a history of commitment issues and had been engaged twice previously. He thought the five kids in 8 years would solve this.
oof
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:42 am to Cosmo
quote:you dodged a bullet
she ended it by saying “I love you and could see myself marrying you but Ive been watching sex and the city lately and feel like i need to explore myself and my sexuality more before settling down.”
And obviously wasn't dicking her down properly
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:44 am to R11
quote:
found a marriage class online that’s pretty expensive, it’s a 3 day workshop. I feel like this is my last attempt to reconcile. She surprisingly agreed to want to go.
Before you go through this ask her to be 100% honest with you on if she is going to try or not. Could be that she is letting you exhaust every route in an effort to 'let you down easy' and not blame yourself that you didn't try.
Posted on 2/17/20 at 10:44 am to Cosmo
quote:
In med school dated one of the nurses for almost a year, i was 24, she was 22. I shite you not she ended it by saying “I love you and could see myself marrying you but Ive been watching sex and the city lately and feel like i need to explore myself and my sexuality more before settling down.”
Please tell us you know what this girl is up to these daysPosted on 2/17/20 at 10:44 am to Cosmo
quote:
Just seems like a modern thing, particularly with women, that if you arent happy 24/7 then something is wrong and drastic changes must be made.
Women will do whatever it takes to have financial stability.
That's their only care in life.
This post was edited on 2/17/20 at 10:46 am
Page 5 of 23
Popular
Back to top
Follow TigerDroppings for LSU Football News