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Started By
Message
A joke to start the week
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:10 am
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:10 am
So a "working girl" started her first night and was a bit nervous about it, but the other girls encouraged her and she went out for her first job. When she returned the others asked her how it went.
She said "Well, first he asked me how much it would cost to get laid, and I told him $100. He said he didn't have that much money so he wanted to know the price of a handy. I told him that was only $10 and he agreed."
"So I unzipped him and that was the biggest piece of tube steak I've ever seen. I put one hand on the base, the other hand on top of it, and then the first hand on top of that and he was still poking out the other end."
"So I loaned him $90".
She said "Well, first he asked me how much it would cost to get laid, and I told him $100. He said he didn't have that much money so he wanted to know the price of a handy. I told him that was only $10 and he agreed."
"So I unzipped him and that was the biggest piece of tube steak I've ever seen. I put one hand on the base, the other hand on top of it, and then the first hand on top of that and he was still poking out the other end."
"So I loaned him $90".
15
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:11 am to foshizzle
quote:
joke
This post was edited on 8/7/17 at 7:13 am
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:16 am to foshizzle
Not very well constructed but has potential.
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:17 am to foshizzle
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:18 am to foshizzle
How do we know God is a man? Because if he would have been a woman, he woulda have made jizz taste like chocolate.
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:19 am to foshizzle
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:21 am to foshizzle
90 is 900 percent
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:22 am to foshizzle
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:23 am to foshizzle
What did the octogenarian pirate say at his birthday?
Ayem-Maety!
Ayem-Maety!
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:26 am to foshizzle
A little girl is standing on top of a cliff, looking down at the sea and crying her eyes out. A priest approaches and says, "My child, why are you so upset?"
The little girl turns to him and says, "My mummy and daddy were in their car -- and it just rolled over the cliff and smashed on the rocks down there."
The priest slowly looks around him while unbuttoning his cassock and says, "It's just not your day, is it?"
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:26 am to foshizzle
So where is the joke?
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:30 am to foshizzle
quote:
foshizzle
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:30 am to PhillipJFry
Why wouldn't Jesus be good on a hockey team?
He'll get nailed to the boards.
He'll get nailed to the boards.
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:30 am to foshizzle
Since y'all liked that one so much here's another one:
A classmate of mine from med school lost his license. Apparently he was having sex with some of his patients.
He was incredibly talented though, it's a shame he threw away such a promising career as a mortician.
I'll be here all week everyone!
A classmate of mine from med school lost his license. Apparently he was having sex with some of his patients.
He was incredibly talented though, it's a shame he threw away such a promising career as a mortician.
I'll be here all week everyone!
This post was edited on 8/7/17 at 7:31 am
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:42 am to foshizzle
quote:
I'll be here all week everyone!
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:46 am to foshizzle
Please don't
Posted on 8/7/17 at 7:47 am to SuperSaint
quote:
A little girl is standing on top of a cliff, looking down at the sea and crying her eyes out. A priest approaches and says, "My child, why are you so upset?"
The little girl turns to him and says, "My mummy and daddy were in their car -- and it just rolled over the cliff and smashed on the rocks down there."
The priest slowly looks around him while unbuttoning his cassock and says, "It's just not your day, is it?"
This joke works better if it is a little boy.
Posted on 8/7/17 at 8:05 am to LSUSUPERSTAR
What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?
Dam
Dam
Posted on 8/7/17 at 8:12 am to foshizzle
I like the joke therefore I gave you an upvote. 
Posted on 8/7/17 at 8:12 am to foshizzle
Paraphrased from Redditt.
Have a down vote.
Have a down vote.
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