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Started By
Message
re: Favorite/Most Savage George Costanza Quote
Posted on 1/12/17 at 12:37 pm to TigerSaints318
Posted on 1/12/17 at 12:37 pm to TigerSaints318
while huddled around the ambulance after the Fire:
quote:
GEORGE: I...was trying to lead the way. We needed a leader! Someone to lead the way to safety.
ROBIN: But you yelled "get out of my way"!
GEORGE: Because! Because, as the leader...if I die...then all hope is lost! Who would lead? The clown? Instead of castigating me, you should all be thanking me. What kind of a topsy-turvy world do we live in, where heroes are cast as villains? Brave men as cowards?
ROBIN: But I saw you push the women and children out of the way in a mad panic! I saw you knock them down! And when you ran out, you left everyone behind!
GEORGE: Seemingly. Seemingly, to the untrained eye, I can fully understand how you got that impression. What looked like pushing...what looked like knocking down...was a safety precaution. In a fire, you stay close to the ground, am I right? And when I ran out that door, I was not leaving anyone behind! Oh, quite the contrary! I risked my life making sure that exit was clear. Any other questions?
FIREMAN: How do you live with yourself?
GEORGE: Its not easy.
2
Posted on 1/12/17 at 12:52 pm to WG_Dawg
OMG I just remembered my favorite of all time. It is SUCH a minor insignificant line that nobody else would even really pay attention to but for some reason it absolutely cracks me up every single time.
It's the marine biologist episode after he gets fixed up with the girl. There's some random scene then the next shot is a cut to George sitting in a chair at home on the phone with her in mid-conversation with her. The first lines we hear him say to her are "algae..obviously plankton. I don't know what else I can tell you"
I can only imagine how the beginning of that conversation had gone, and how classicly smug george is that plankton should be so obvious to everyone.
It's the marine biologist episode after he gets fixed up with the girl. There's some random scene then the next shot is a cut to George sitting in a chair at home on the phone with her in mid-conversation with her. The first lines we hear him say to her are "algae..obviously plankton. I don't know what else I can tell you"
I can only imagine how the beginning of that conversation had gone, and how classicly smug george is that plankton should be so obvious to everyone.
Posted on 1/12/17 at 12:52 pm to Speedy G
Another great part of that scene that is right after the gif cuts out is that he doesnt' just throw the kids out of the way and head out the door, he shuts it behind him 
Posted on 1/12/17 at 12:58 pm to The Truth 34
Jerry just remember, it's not a lie of you believe it.
Posted on 1/12/17 at 12:59 pm to WG_Dawg
GEORGE: Aha. Aha. Could it be because you don't want him to know that you have a friend who pees in the shower, is that it?!
ELAINE: No, that's not it!
GEORGE: Oh, I think it is! I think that's exactly what it is!
ELAINE: Why couldn't you just wait?
GEORGE: I was there! I saw a drain!
ELAINE: Since when is a drain a toilet?!
GEORGE: It's all pipes! What's the difference?!
ELAINE: Different pipes go to different places! You're gonna mix 'em up!
GEORGE: I'll call a plumber right now!
ELAINE: No, that's not it!
GEORGE: Oh, I think it is! I think that's exactly what it is!
ELAINE: Why couldn't you just wait?
GEORGE: I was there! I saw a drain!
ELAINE: Since when is a drain a toilet?!
GEORGE: It's all pipes! What's the difference?!
ELAINE: Different pipes go to different places! You're gonna mix 'em up!
GEORGE: I'll call a plumber right now!
Posted on 1/12/17 at 1:11 pm to The Truth 34
quote:
GEORGE:...and then when I saw the photo I remembered where I'd seen him; the boom box incident.
JERRY: The boom box incident?
GEORGE: Summer of '89. I'm at the beach. This family sits up next to me. I go in to the surfs and when I come from out, my clothes, my towel, my umbrella, they're all gone. I am furious, I start screaming to these kids demanding my stuff back and finally I lose it; I grab their boom box and I chuck it in to the ocean.
JERRY: Seems reasonable.
GEORGE: Then I see my clothes floating out there. The tied took them out, not the kids.
JERRY: Even more reasonable.
GEORGE: So now, the father is screaming at me, he's demanding that I pay for the boom box. Finally, I gave them a fake address and got the hell out of there.
Posted on 1/12/17 at 1:45 pm to The Truth 34
"Well, I went to the jerk store, and they were out of you!"
Posted on 1/12/17 at 2:48 pm to The Truth 34
WE HAD A PACT
Posted on 1/12/17 at 3:00 pm to kingbob
quote:
"Well, I went to the jerk store, and they were out of you!"
My brother says this to me at least once every 6 months. Classic.
Posted on 1/12/17 at 3:04 pm to madmaxvol
quote:
My brother says this to me at least once every 6 months. Classic.
I've heard you're their #1 best seller!
Posted on 1/12/17 at 5:20 pm to The Truth 34
I thought of another one. George's verbal contribution is brief but fantastic and the whole scene is just hilarious. This is the end of it:
SUSAN: Well, the thing is..
MR. ROSS: What? What is it?
SUSAN: Well, the - the cabin, is, kind of, uh.. George?
GEORGE: (Extremely blunt) Burned.
MR. ROSS: Burned?
SUSAN: There was a fire, and it uh..
GEORGE: Burned.
SUSAN: Well, the thing is..
MR. ROSS: What? What is it?
SUSAN: Well, the - the cabin, is, kind of, uh.. George?
GEORGE: (Extremely blunt) Burned.
MR. ROSS: Burned?
SUSAN: There was a fire, and it uh..
GEORGE: Burned.
Posted on 1/12/17 at 7:19 pm to The Truth 34
Jerry: "He took you to Rageaholics? Why?"
George: "Probably because this whole Universe is against me!"
Jerry: "You've got a little rage."
George: "I know. And now they want me to bottle it up. It makes me so mad!"
George: "Probably because this whole Universe is against me!"
Jerry: "You've got a little rage."
George: "I know. And now they want me to bottle it up. It makes me so mad!"
Posted on 1/12/17 at 7:30 pm to SCLibertarian
Yeah, I’m a great quitter. It’s one of the few things I do well. I come from a long line of quitters. My father was a quitter, my grandfather was a quitter… I was raised to give up.
Posted on 1/12/17 at 9:17 pm to Tigers2010
Estel: well I've gotta keep myself up now George. I'm a divorcee.
George: you're not even divorced. You're just separated. You're a separatee.
Estel: well, I'm out there George.
George: no you're not.
Estel: I am too!
George: you're NOT out there...you can't be out there...because I'm out there...and if I see YOU out there, there's not enough voltage in this world to electroshock me back into coherence!
George: you're not even divorced. You're just separated. You're a separatee.
Estel: well, I'm out there George.
George: no you're not.
Estel: I am too!
George: you're NOT out there...you can't be out there...because I'm out there...and if I see YOU out there, there's not enough voltage in this world to electroshock me back into coherence!
Posted on 1/12/17 at 9:22 pm to The Truth 34
Was that wrong? I'll have to plead ignorance here.
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