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Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:31 pm to AlbertMeansWell
quote:
The worst part is, I miss her so much. I know she screwed me over in the way she handled it but she’s still my wife. I feel so guilty for missing her.
Don't you feel guilty at all.
You married her. You made a vow and planned your life together. From the kids and careers to places to live, you did this together. You laid in bed and talked about retirement vacations all the good stuff like that. It's okay to feel that and hurt.
Don't you feel guilty about a God Damned thing. That's what married people are supposed to do.
The hardest thing now is to imagine a life without her. And the second is to not cry in front of the kids. You're not alone bud.
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:32 pm to tigerfoot
quote:
they are all trifling....but the man, no, no, no hell no.
Fact
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:32 pm to mikelbr
quote:dropping mad feelings and insight in this thray
mikelbr
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:34 pm to AlbertMeansWell
quote:
she still loved me and was madly in love with me. She said she just couldn’t do it anymore
This is a lie. A bad lie.
Happy people only leave when they are totally self destructive and cannot handle stability
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:34 pm to Kcrad
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:41 pm to AlbertMeansWell
My divorce was finalized last month. The first month was emotional but we gathered ourselves and it’s been strictly business since then. It’s when I got out and started dating again that made me go wtf. My ex and I are polar opposites and I sometimes wonder if it wasn’t worth just dealing with that.
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:43 pm to OWLFAN86
quote:
dropping mad feelings and insight in this thray
As for the posters who can't forgive the man. You have but ONE thing you can control. Is the new man good to your kids.
The man she left me for was a GREAT stepdad to my kids and treated them so good even when they had two more of their own. It's hard to accept but that's all YOU can hope for when she chooses a new man.
And when you finally get over yourself and accept that your wife is remarried to a guy who really loves your kids and wants the best for them, it's a great fricking feeling.
I always got a warm comforting feeling when I'd pull up to get my girls and their stepdad was outside playing catch with my youngest. That's the genuine good shite.
He didn't do me wrong personally. shite happens.
It's about the next generation and raising my girls right.
This post was edited on 8/10/20 at 8:45 pm
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:46 pm to HoustonGumbeauxGuy
quote:
Don’t be too proud to go see a therapist. I’ve had several friends go through a nasty divorce and they will tell you that seeing a therapist was the best idea they ever had
Screw that. The best therapy for a divorce is fricking younger women
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:49 pm to mikelbr
mikelbr You could not be more right!! It is about the kids after a relationship has gone south!
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:51 pm to AlbertMeansWell
quote:. Assuming you meant “wasn’t”, does “madly in love” even exist past a first few years of marriage?
still loved me and was madly in love with me
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:52 pm to AlbertMeansWell
You will get over it. Trust me
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:54 pm to AlbertMeansWell
quote:
She told me yesterday to my face that she still loved me and was madly in love with me. She said she just couldn’t do it anymore.
I don’t know why she’s doing it but I’d be wary, you don’t take your kids & half the money & move out without saying something if you are madly in love
Get a lawyer, get everything in writing, follow the good advice from other posts
If things do work out then that’s your decision but if they don’t at least you will be protected
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:55 pm to AlbertMeansWell
always remember that no matter how bad you think you are getting screwed over, your kids are getting it worse. Never forget that
you are a grown man and you will recover. It took me years and it was not until I found my one true love that it got even remotely better. But I had a good job, a good family, and support all around me. My daughter despite my best efforts was deeply hurt and it basically ruined her childhood. She’s thriving now and I couldn’t be more proud, but her trauma is a regret I will never live down
not saying you can keep that from happening but you have to do your best to try
you are a grown man and you will recover. It took me years and it was not until I found my one true love that it got even remotely better. But I had a good job, a good family, and support all around me. My daughter despite my best efforts was deeply hurt and it basically ruined her childhood. She’s thriving now and I couldn’t be more proud, but her trauma is a regret I will never live down
not saying you can keep that from happening but you have to do your best to try
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:56 pm to AlbertMeansWell
If it's of any consolation, I knew a guy who the same thing happened to him. He himself paid for his wife to go through college. He was of average socioeconomic wealth, she was a bit less. Her family wouldn't pay for her college, so she married this guy and he paid her way for about 3 years. Not less than a semester after she graduated, she filed for divorce. Bitch ended up marrying a well off dude about a year after the divorce.
But, a happy ending, my friend married a much better woman, has two kids and has been happily married since.
I hope a happy ending for you as well.
But, a happy ending, my friend married a much better woman, has two kids and has been happily married since.
I hope a happy ending for you as well.
This post was edited on 8/10/20 at 8:57 pm
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:56 pm to StupidBinder
quote:
I’m not going to say it has never happened, but I don’t know a single divorced person who says, “Got divorced, it went really well”.
I was young and thought I’d done some living at the ripe age of 21. Got married to my high school sweetheart and divorced a year later.
Her dad was kind enough to me to let his daughter know that there would be no money involved. I got emailed the papers a week later, had them notarized, and sent them back. 6 months later, it was a done deal.
As far as divorces go, that was easy. We still live in the same town together, but I never see her. Ironically, I was in the same fantasy football league with her new husband a couple of years ago. He and I have mutual friends and get along fine.
Posted on 8/10/20 at 8:57 pm to LSUJML
I don’t know why she’s doing it but I’d be wary, you don’t take your kids & half the money & move out without saying something if you are madly in love
Get a lawyer, get everything in writing, follow the good advice from other posts
If things do work out then that’s your decision but if they don’t at least you will be protected
He is right you know!
Posted on 8/10/20 at 9:00 pm to imageauto
I also had a vasectomy a year ago lol.
Posted on 8/10/20 at 9:01 pm to mikelbr
One parent not being respectful and mature around the kids can throw a divorce into something more ugly than it needs to be.
That's what happened with my parents and it unnecessarily soured the relationship between us kids and either one of our parents.
Y'all are the ones that have problems. Leave the kids out of it and let them try to go on as normally as possible.
That's what happened with my parents and it unnecessarily soured the relationship between us kids and either one of our parents.
Y'all are the ones that have problems. Leave the kids out of it and let them try to go on as normally as possible.
Posted on 8/10/20 at 9:02 pm to mikelbr
quote:
if she blindsided you, it was because she still cared and was struggling with the decision, timing, etc.
Oh for Christ’s sake.
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