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Message
How to deal with a "phone phobia" in the workplace
Posted on 3/7/17 at 10:15 pm
Posted on 3/7/17 at 10:15 pm
I realize this may sound ridiculous, but it's very real to me and I'm not sure what to do.
I've started my first professional job. Everything is going great so far, people have been very complimentary of my work. My particular strengths are writing, editing, and research.
Sorry if this is vague, but I don't want to reveal too much. As part of a project I'm on now, we have to call members of certain industries to try and arrange a phone interview regarding their opinion on a source used in the making of their products. Right now, it's cold calling companies off a list and asking around to see if we can find the particular person we need to talk to and if they would be willing to answer our phone survey.
Here's the issue: I'm absolutely terrified to make these calls. This is not simply not liking cold-calling, which I figure is pretty standard. This is an anxiety that is consuming me 24 hours a day, shaking, trouble breathing, dizziness. I've made a few calls and they haven't gone too terribly, but it's an anticipatory anxiety that is literally making me ill.
What can I do? I know the simple answer is "suck it up." This is the type of anxiety that pretty much fits the ADA definition of a covered mental illness.
I'm so embarrassed by this and I don't want it to derail my life.
I've started my first professional job. Everything is going great so far, people have been very complimentary of my work. My particular strengths are writing, editing, and research.
Sorry if this is vague, but I don't want to reveal too much. As part of a project I'm on now, we have to call members of certain industries to try and arrange a phone interview regarding their opinion on a source used in the making of their products. Right now, it's cold calling companies off a list and asking around to see if we can find the particular person we need to talk to and if they would be willing to answer our phone survey.
Here's the issue: I'm absolutely terrified to make these calls. This is not simply not liking cold-calling, which I figure is pretty standard. This is an anxiety that is consuming me 24 hours a day, shaking, trouble breathing, dizziness. I've made a few calls and they haven't gone too terribly, but it's an anticipatory anxiety that is literally making me ill.
What can I do? I know the simple answer is "suck it up." This is the type of anxiety that pretty much fits the ADA definition of a covered mental illness.
I'm so embarrassed by this and I don't want it to derail my life.
Posted on 3/7/17 at 10:18 pm to TheWalrus
Make an appointment with your GP. Tell him about what's going on. He'll either prescribe you something or give you a referral to a psychiatrist. No shame in needing help with anxiety.
I know that may sound drastic but you seem like you're being pretty honest with yourself and no amount of "sucking it up" or pep talk will cure it.
I know that may sound drastic but you seem like you're being pretty honest with yourself and no amount of "sucking it up" or pep talk will cure it.
This post was edited on 3/8/17 at 10:03 am
Posted on 3/7/17 at 10:23 pm to TheWalrus
Are you scared of not knowing how to answer a question? It could be a confidence issue.
Posted on 3/7/17 at 10:35 pm to TheWalrus
First, calm down. It's not going to derail your life. Remember that you know more about what your calling for than they do and approach it that way. Remember that ultimately you're trying To help them (improve their products, find better sources, do it cheaper etc.)
Secondly, don't be embarrassed about it. Talk to someone at your work about it. Not even a supervisor, an equal. Hell, tell the janitor about it. Sharing something with someone really does make it easier to carry.
Finally, if you're a religious man, pray about it and say "I'm just here to do your will". That way no matter the outcome of the call you know you did your part.
As an aside, a college buddy of mine used to wear sunglasses in his office when he made cold calls. Made him feel more anonymous and therefore more secure.
Secondly, don't be embarrassed about it. Talk to someone at your work about it. Not even a supervisor, an equal. Hell, tell the janitor about it. Sharing something with someone really does make it easier to carry.
Finally, if you're a religious man, pray about it and say "I'm just here to do your will". That way no matter the outcome of the call you know you did your part.
As an aside, a college buddy of mine used to wear sunglasses in his office when he made cold calls. Made him feel more anonymous and therefore more secure.
Posted on 3/7/17 at 10:50 pm to TheWalrus
I'm right with you there man. Hate talking to strangers on the phone.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 1:51 am to TheWalrus
Many people are terrified to make cold calls. Back in college, we had to do it for recruitment. Many guys simply couldn't make the calls.
I would talk to colleagues about it. They probably all experienced the same issues. It will get better with time.
I would talk to colleagues about it. They probably all experienced the same issues. It will get better with time.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 6:00 am to TheWalrus
I went through some phone phobia stuff years ago. The only thing that helped was time, meditating, and getting more experience talking on the phone. Now when I talk on the phone I make sure I am present (listening to what the other person has to say) and I don't really care what happens. 9/10 the other person is also worried about sounding like a moron so it all evens out. Cold calling can be brutal but as long as you're polite and not pushy it shouldn't be that bad
Posted on 3/8/17 at 6:52 am to TheWalrus
I hate talking to strangers on the phone too.
Just imagine it from their point of view. If you were getting cold called would you even remember/give a shite 5 seconds after you hang up? What's a huge deal to you is something they won't even remember tomorrow. That makes it easier for me.
Just imagine it from their point of view. If you were getting cold called would you even remember/give a shite 5 seconds after you hang up? What's a huge deal to you is something they won't even remember tomorrow. That makes it easier for me.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 7:13 am to TheWalrus
Here's the thing - that's not cold calling. You are not picking names out of a phone book or off Facebook to sell random shite to, you are surveying businesses to help improve their product. The anxiety comes from the expectation that they will say they are not interested or hang up, and some of them probably will but so what? Go on to the next one.
Think of it as a game - what should I say to this person on the other line to get the information I need?
Think of it as a game - what should I say to this person on the other line to get the information I need?
Posted on 3/8/17 at 7:22 am to TheWalrus
Use an alias if it helps you feel better. Always keep in mind, these people have no clue who you are. If you end up saying something stupid, who cares, they don't know you.
You'll eventually learn not to sweat and probably come out with funny stories of people you talked to.
I used to make political calls and at first I dreaded it, but eventually it didn't matter to me. Trust me, I've been cussed out a time or two and called every name under the sun. But what of it?
You'll eventually learn not to sweat and probably come out with funny stories of people you talked to.
I used to make political calls and at first I dreaded it, but eventually it didn't matter to me. Trust me, I've been cussed out a time or two and called every name under the sun. But what of it?
Posted on 3/8/17 at 8:09 am to TheWalrus
I know the feeling. I've suffered from the same exact thing my entire life. The worst part is it is so difficult and awkward trying to explain it to someone that has no problem picking up the phone and calling someone. It has to sound so damn ridiculous to them.
I really don't have any advice. I don't know that I've found a workable solution to my own problem.
I really don't have any advice. I don't know that I've found a workable solution to my own problem.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:41 am to TheWalrus
I totally get this. I am not a people person and never have been. Due to my particular vocation and the exact area I practice I meet anywhere from 10-50 people in a given week most of whom I don't know there name until I meet them. And I have to make small talk and deal with groups of 4-6 for 1 hour at a time.
It took me a while. I didn't need any sort of anxiety medication but I wouldn't hesitate to look in that direction if I thought I needed too. As others have suggested that may be the best route.
It took me a while. I didn't need any sort of anxiety medication but I wouldn't hesitate to look in that direction if I thought I needed too. As others have suggested that may be the best route.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:57 am to TheWalrus
I will walk up to complete strangers and talk to them at events, but I DESPISE calling strangers on the phone. It's awful to me. I think it's because I can't see them, I can't see their reaction, etc. I also think it's because I get annoyed with cold calls because the assumption is that they are trying to sell me something I don't need.
It's something that gets a little better over time, but I still don't enjoy it.
Maybe have a buddy in there with you while you make some calls, if that may put you at ease? Maybe the can listen in and afterwards give you some suggestions?
Talking to a counselor may help you learn some meditation practices.
It's something that gets a little better over time, but I still don't enjoy it.
Maybe have a buddy in there with you while you make some calls, if that may put you at ease? Maybe the can listen in and afterwards give you some suggestions?
Talking to a counselor may help you learn some meditation practices.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 10:19 am to TheWalrus
quote:
TheWalrus
quote:
I realize this may sound ridiculous, but it's very real to me and I'm not sure what to do.
I've started my first professional job. Everything is going great so far, people have been very complimentary of my work. My particular strengths are writing, editing, and research.
Sorry if this is vague, but I don't want to reveal too much. As part of a project I'm on now, we have to call members of certain industries to try and arrange a phone interview regarding their opinion on a source used in the making of their products. Right now, it's cold calling companies off a list and asking around to see if we can find the particular person we need to talk to and if they would be willing to answer our phone survey.
Here's the issue: I'm absolutely terrified to make these calls. This is not simply not liking cold-calling, which I figure is pretty standard. This is an anxiety that is consuming me 24 hours a day, shaking, trouble breathing, dizziness. I've made a few calls and they haven't gone too terribly, but it's an anticipatory anxiety that is literally making me ill.
What can I do? I know the simple answer is "suck it up." This is the type of anxiety that pretty much fits the ADA definition of a covered mental illness.
I'm so embarrassed by this and I don't want it to derail my life.
This is a tough one. The majority of my first few "real," jobs were all related to being on the phone. I started out in the collections biz for a mortgage company way back when.
They were sub-prime to start off with and then they were late on their house-note, so you heard all kinda sh!t on the phone when they picked up (late 90's; before the widespread use of caller ID and smartphones). By the time I left there I was actually still in college at LSU but I'd been battle-hardened.
Went on to do stints as a 20-something in several CSR positions in a cube-farm environment before getting into commissioned sales. The thing I'd keep in mind is that at the end of the day, you'll never be perfect. Especially to start off. But if you don't start and go through the process, you'll never overcome your fear. But you'll also have zero chance to get better at it.
This is a skill that you obviously need to improve. It's no different than things you learned in school to get you where you are. It's just that this is a "soft skill," that isn't exactly something you're taught in a classroom.
You've got to learn by doing. The first few calls will suck. But you'll get acclimated and over time your delivery, confidence and comfort on the phone will begin to appear.
But the longer you put off just starting it and failing forward, the longer you'll deal with your issues.
Good luck.
ETA: I'm a big extrovert, though. I actually enjoy bullsh!tting with people and I'm okay with complete strangers. I think some of that is how I'm wired. Some of it comes from my experience on the phones and in person with people over the course of time.
As always, YMMV
This post was edited on 3/8/17 at 10:23 am
Posted on 3/8/17 at 10:50 am to TheWalrus
Dbap
Posted on 3/8/17 at 5:31 pm to TheWalrus
I went through the same with my first job out of college not even 2 years ago. What made it worse is that we had this open cube farm where everyone can see and hear everything. It got to the point where, like you, would be affected at home by the thought of a call I knew I had to make the next day.
The answer, as others have stated, is to just do it more. Volunteer for projects/assignments that force you to do more phone work. Like anything else, once you break through, you'll be fine. Not perfect, but certainly better than yo think you are. No one is going to be more critical of you than you.
Hell, i still get a little anxious here and there, but the difference is it all goes away once im on the phone.
Youll get there and probably further than me in less time if you keep at it. Good luck!
The answer, as others have stated, is to just do it more. Volunteer for projects/assignments that force you to do more phone work. Like anything else, once you break through, you'll be fine. Not perfect, but certainly better than yo think you are. No one is going to be more critical of you than you.
Hell, i still get a little anxious here and there, but the difference is it all goes away once im on the phone.
Youll get there and probably further than me in less time if you keep at it. Good luck!
Posted on 3/8/17 at 5:42 pm to TheWalrus
Shot of fireball 15 minutes before you make the first call.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 7:49 pm to TheWalrus
My first job I had to do something similar. It just takes time and confidence and you will get better and not let it consume you.
What I did was basically map out all the potential issues or questions the client could have to ask me while on the phone. I would basically have a prepared response for anything I could possibly think of beforehand. The anxiety doesn't last long, you just need to practice
What I did was basically map out all the potential issues or questions the client could have to ask me while on the phone. I would basically have a prepared response for anything I could possibly think of beforehand. The anxiety doesn't last long, you just need to practice
Posted on 3/8/17 at 7:55 pm to TheWalrus
I had this as well. I don't think mine was as extreme as yours though. I would tell you just to do as many as you can as soon as you can. After you get over the hump you won't think twice about it.
Posted on 3/9/17 at 4:33 pm to TheWalrus
Drink at work.
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