FEMA Director Teleports 50 miles to a Waffle House

What's dexerto.com?

Who hasn't woken up in a Waffle House with serious questions on how they got there?

You ever black out, or as I call it, "time travel"? You ever do that? Oh yeah, you know it is: You're drinkin', you black out, you wake up, you're in another bar, you're drinkin', you black out, you wake up, you're playin' that knife game with a half Indian somewhere in North Dakota... yeah! Yeah! Winner fixes the tranny! Yeah! You're drinkin', you black out, you wake up, you're in White Castle, workin' there three years, still not assistant manager. Your buddies tell you to quit, but you can't, 'cause you're bangin' the slow girl on the Fry-a-lator. They say she's a little dim, but those titties ain't dim!

I don’t want to hang out with anyone who’s never realized they’re at a Waffle House with no recollection of how they got there.

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Time warps are reel.

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We called them Fred’s Bombs or Shroom Tea.

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Went to the Waffle House near Flora Bama after a long night out

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Near? It's directly across the street homie.

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Sounds like an excellent example of “near”

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Less near and more adjacent.

But I realize I am being a bit pedantic here.

Near far....wherever you are...

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I am beginning to doubt our President's judgement when it comes to some of his picks.

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He fired the last dude he appointed to head FEMA because the guy had the nerve to answer truthfully, under oath, before Congress that he didn't believe FEMA was in a good position and the plan going forward was not good.

Fired the next day.

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Time warps are reel.

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I used to teleport all the time as a kid. I would fall asleep on the couch and would wake up in my bed.