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Message
Adulting really sucks at times
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:01 am
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:01 am
Sitting in the hospital (ICU) watching my 80 year old mom with tubes in her is not easy. She has pneumonia and fluid build up , she has had this issue a few times recently. Told my dad to stay home (81) bc he has such a hard time seeing her like this. They have been together for over 50 years.
26
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:04 am to Split2874
I'm sorry.
I live WITH my 91 y/o mother. Hospitals absolutely drain every ounce of positivity, and physical energy from a person, whether patient, visitor or caregiver.
I live WITH my 91 y/o mother. Hospitals absolutely drain every ounce of positivity, and physical energy from a person, whether patient, visitor or caregiver.
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:04 am to Split2874
Prayers for your Mom (and you and Dad). Its tough seeing that.
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:07 am to Split2874
It is hard.
And it is what an adult was meant to do.
Too many want to pawn this stuff out to places where their family is treated like someone in the drive thru at Popeyes.
My mom and her two sisters passed before my grandmother who lived into her 90s so I had to face this many years ago.
It is tough. It is heartbreaking. But being there for them is the least we can do.
I pray you and family find peace.
And it is what an adult was meant to do.
Too many want to pawn this stuff out to places where their family is treated like someone in the drive thru at Popeyes.
My mom and her two sisters passed before my grandmother who lived into her 90s so I had to face this many years ago.
It is tough. It is heartbreaking. But being there for them is the least we can do.
I pray you and family find peace.
This post was edited on 3/16/26 at 11:08 am
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:07 am to Split2874
Im sure you know this but if things do not end well for her, you have to be extremely supportive of your Father. Soulmates for 50 years will put a very heavy burden on him without her.
Im so sorry you're dealing with this brother, praying for you and your family man.
Im so sorry you're dealing with this brother, praying for you and your family man.
This post was edited on 3/16/26 at 11:11 am
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:12 am to PCRammer
Thought and prayers to anyone dealing with this. This part was definitely not in the adulting brochure.
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:14 am to Split2874
Saying adulting is so cringe and soy woke.
Sorry about your mom.
Sorry about your mom.
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:21 am to UptownJoeBrown
Yes it is and I don't really give a frick about it. It is the word I latched onto this time around. It helps make a little less real for me so I can deal with what is going on. Thank you for your input.
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:21 am to Split2874
Most stressful time in my life was helping to manage the care of my mother during the final two years of her life. Prayers are with you.
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:31 am to Split2874
quote:
Sitting in the hospital (ICU) watching my 80 year old mom with tubes in her is not easy. She has pneumonia and fluid build up , she has had this issue a few times recently. Told my dad to stay home (81) bc he has such a hard time seeing her like this. They have been together for over 50 years.
My brother:
1) I am sorry to hear about your situation, Its never easy to lose loved ones.
2) You are severely misusing the term "adulting". Adulting is like having to pay your own cellphone bill or having to cook your own meals. What you are describing is one of the saddest aspects of life which has nothing to do with being an adult.
My family will pray for you, your mom, and your dad. I hope everyone finds peace in this situation.
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:36 am to Split2874
I spent the last 6 weeks of my old man’s life watching him age 3 years every week—looked like he ran hitlers gauntlet at Auschwitz by the end of it—taking care of him with mom. It was the most difficult, yet rewarding thing I’ve ever gone through. I get why you would tell your father to stay away, but I think that’s a miscalculation of what humanity is all about.
This post was edited on 3/16/26 at 11:39 am
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:50 am to The Third Leg
Adulting is the word that I choose to help me through this at this time. I really dont care about anyone's opinion on me using the word.
My dad does not want to see my mom like this , so I am at the hospital until they take out the tube or tell us it has to stay in. He will come up no mater what but if he could avoid see her with a tube he would prefer that. My dad says all he sees when he sees her with the tune is my older brother who passed away about 8 years ago from a stroke. The last image is my brother with a tube in his mouth. He is 81 and cant deal with stuff like he used to, so I have to step up for him. I am very proud of myself for being able to take on more of the head of the family roll but I am still their little boy and it is very hard at time. So if I use a word you dont approve of please let it slide at this time.
My dad does not want to see my mom like this , so I am at the hospital until they take out the tube or tell us it has to stay in. He will come up no mater what but if he could avoid see her with a tube he would prefer that. My dad says all he sees when he sees her with the tune is my older brother who passed away about 8 years ago from a stroke. The last image is my brother with a tube in his mouth. He is 81 and cant deal with stuff like he used to, so I have to step up for him. I am very proud of myself for being able to take on more of the head of the family roll but I am still their little boy and it is very hard at time. So if I use a word you dont approve of please let it slide at this time.
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:53 am to Split2874
Sorry you are dealing with this.
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:54 am to UptownJoeBrown
quote:
Saying adulting is so cringe and soy woke.
It's all subjective, but saying "cringe" seems 20 times more cringeworthy and limp wristed than "adulting."
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:57 am to Split2874
Everyone should get the pneumonia vaccine. It’s a very common complication in older people. It’s an actual vaccine.
Posted on 3/16/26 at 11:57 am to Split2874
Thank you for having the strength of character to be there with her. Patients need to have an advocate there to be sure that if they need something, that need is met. Especially if it's met by someone with a brain.
We've seen what happens if there is no one or if the supposed care giver is a ditz, and the results were terminal.
By sparing your Father the stress of being there and feeling helpless, you have given a gift to both of them. And to yourself.
We've seen what happens if there is no one or if the supposed care giver is a ditz, and the results were terminal.
By sparing your Father the stress of being there and feeling helpless, you have given a gift to both of them. And to yourself.
Posted on 3/16/26 at 12:00 pm to RedPop4
quote:
Hospitals absolutely drain every ounce of positivity, and physical energy from a person, whether patient, visitor or caregiver
This is the truth. 2024 I seemed to spend every moment I had in some hospital between both my parents….lost my mom towards the end of that year. Really hate hospitals.
Posted on 3/16/26 at 12:02 pm to Split2874
So sorry baw. It’s a good thing you are doing for your dad. Sometimes you have to be Superman for your Superman.
Posted on 3/16/26 at 12:02 pm to Split2874
Prayers offered for your Mom and family. God bless and may she have a speedy recovery.
This post was edited on 3/16/26 at 12:03 pm
Posted on 3/16/26 at 12:03 pm to UptownJoeBrown
quote:
Everyone should get the pneumonia vaccine. It’s a very common complication in older people. It’s an actual vaccine.
She get the vaccine whenever available. She got one i think in late Dec/ early Jan and has had pneumonia 2x since.
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