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Message
Veteran Suicide
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:48 pm
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:48 pm
Recently one of the guys I served with committed suicide after years of struggling with the effects of what he experienced in the sandbox. I had tried to be there for him financially and as a friend. While I was unavailable recently he committed suicide. He had called me many times and texted needing help.
While I don't want to make this about me, I've pretty much shut down. I'm struggling knowing that I was not there.
People who know me have withdrawn from me as well. Business associates I've been kind to and have known me for years not only have stopped contact with me but speak ill of me due to my recent change in demeanor.
My finances are fine and I've had a blessed life. From now going forward I trust no one or organization. The groups I've reached out to for support have been useless. This time in my life is as hard and as isolated as I've ever been.
What I won't do is give up.
Rest in peace my friend. You earned it.
While I don't want to make this about me, I've pretty much shut down. I'm struggling knowing that I was not there.
People who know me have withdrawn from me as well. Business associates I've been kind to and have known me for years not only have stopped contact with me but speak ill of me due to my recent change in demeanor.
My finances are fine and I've had a blessed life. From now going forward I trust no one or organization. The groups I've reached out to for support have been useless. This time in my life is as hard and as isolated as I've ever been.
What I won't do is give up.
Rest in peace my friend. You earned it.
35
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:50 pm to TigerRoyale
Seems like it’s all about you.
Go to therapy.
Go to therapy.
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:54 pm to Philzilla
quote:
Go to therapy.
i agree
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:54 pm to TigerRoyale
I feel like there was another poster who went through something similar in the last year or so, so perhaps he will chime in.
I can't say I really understand this
And I don't think leaning into the isolation is going to help. I hope you talk to someone who can help, and I hope you'll consider praying about this as well (and I will, that you will find wisdom and support).
I can't say I really understand this
quote:
From now going forward I trust no one or organization
And I don't think leaning into the isolation is going to help. I hope you talk to someone who can help, and I hope you'll consider praying about this as well (and I will, that you will find wisdom and support).
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:55 pm to Philzilla
Don't be a dick - if you have never had someone close to do that, and have had to experience it - then you don't know what the other person is dealing with.
I had a close friend do that in high School, and it affected me for a long time with guilt of what I could have done differently to help them, what sign i missed and so on. I am almost 50 now, and it still bothers me from time to time.
it is easy to make flippant responses on the forums, because you do not know what is real and not, but if this is a troll post by the OP - it is a damn good one, because I can understand where the post is coming from.
I had a close friend do that in high School, and it affected me for a long time with guilt of what I could have done differently to help them, what sign i missed and so on. I am almost 50 now, and it still bothers me from time to time.
it is easy to make flippant responses on the forums, because you do not know what is real and not, but if this is a troll post by the OP - it is a damn good one, because I can understand where the post is coming from.
This post was edited on 5/13/25 at 2:57 pm
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:55 pm to TigerRoyale
quote:obviously not your fault but I’ve never been so “unavailable” as to not be able to take a phone call, particularly from someone who I know is called for help
While I was unavailable recently he committed suicide. He had called me many times and texted needing help.
best of luck
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:55 pm to TigerRoyale
The answer is shrooms.
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:55 pm to TigerRoyale
Sabotaging your life ain't going to bring him back, man. Dude had made up his mind and it really didn't matter whether you were available or not....it was inevitable.
Go see a shrink. You're depressed. Take a med if you have to to help you get past what is clearly deep grief.
ETA: The VA has a ton of resources available to you and there's NO ONE who knows more about veteran suicide than the VA. If you've shut them out, you're making a tragic mistake.
Go see a shrink. You're depressed. Take a med if you have to to help you get past what is clearly deep grief.
ETA: The VA has a ton of resources available to you and there's NO ONE who knows more about veteran suicide than the VA. If you've shut them out, you're making a tragic mistake.
This post was edited on 5/13/25 at 2:58 pm
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:57 pm to TigerRoyale
Therapy and some meds do wonders. Push yourself and get this done.
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:58 pm to Philzilla
quote:
Seems like it’s all about you. Go to therapy.
Obviously it is. Everything in life is about our reaction to what happens around us whether we admit it or not. His friend isn’t here anymore so he is struggling with his own feelings of guilt, sadness, etc. Therapy is a great idea.
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:58 pm to TigerRoyale
quote:
He had called me many times and texted needing help.
While I don't want to make this about me, I've pretty much shut down. I'm struggling knowing that I was not there.
People who know me have withdrawn from me as well. Business associates I've been kind to and have known me for years not only have stopped contact with me but speak ill of me due to my recent change in demeanor.
seems dicey and vague
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:59 pm to TigerRoyale
When I have dark thoughts I think about all the future marvel movies I would miss
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:59 pm to mmmmmbeeer
Well said
Posted on 5/13/25 at 2:59 pm to Thracken13
I'm no troll and know this is not probably the best place to air personal experiences, but I felt compelled to share my experience because hopefully it may help others. I will ask it to be deleted if inappropriate.
Posted on 5/13/25 at 3:00 pm to TigerRoyale
I'm fine with the honesty and vulnerability
Posted on 5/13/25 at 3:00 pm to TigerRoyale
Have you recently started or stopped taking any medications?
Posted on 5/13/25 at 3:01 pm to mmmmmbeeer
quote:
Dude had made up his mind and it really didn't matter whether you were available or not....it was inevitable.
this, had a very close friend take his life a couple of months ago, from outward appearances the last person you'd ever think would do that, absolutely had the world by the arse, got to move forward, keep pressing on, and let it go
Posted on 5/13/25 at 3:01 pm to TigerRoyale
no need brother - I could read and understand what you were saying. i just mean that in reply to the other person, that if you were - it was masterful.
but do what you can to help yourself man.
but do what you can to help yourself man.
Posted on 5/13/25 at 3:05 pm to TigerRoyale
You can only do so much brother.
Posted on 5/13/25 at 3:06 pm to Thracken13
quote:
Don't be a dick - if you have never had someone close to do that, and have had to experience it - then you don't know what the other person is dealing with.
Shut the frick up.
I’m a veteran, I know lots of veterans who have killed themselves. They needed therapy, not fricking coddling.
Nobody on the OT is qualified to do shite but tell this dude to get therapy.
He needs to talk to somebody.
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