- My Forums
- Tiger Rant
- LSU Recruiting
- SEC Rant
- Saints Talk
- Pelicans Talk
- More Sports Board
- Fantasy Sports
- Golf Board
- Soccer Board
- O-T Lounge
- Tech Board
- Home/Garden Board
- Outdoor Board
- Health/Fitness Board
- Movie/TV Board
- Book Board
- Music Board
- Political Talk
- Money Talk
- Fark Board
- Gaming Board
- Travel Board
- Food/Drink Board
- Ticket Exchange
- TD Help Board
Customize My Forums- View All Forums
- Show Left Links
- Topic Sort Options
- Trending Topics
- Recent Topics
- Active Topics
Started By
Message
Let’s hear a Joke
Posted on 7/11/22 at 10:57 am
Posted on 7/11/22 at 10:57 am
What did the fish say when it ran into a wall
Dam
Dam
This post was edited on 7/11/22 at 11:11 am
Posted on 7/11/22 at 10:58 am to jb4
The OP's Post.
Joke:
Q: How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: THAT IS NOT FUNNY AND IT IS OFFENSIVE!
Joke:
Q: How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: THAT IS NOT FUNNY AND IT IS OFFENSIVE!
This post was edited on 7/11/22 at 11:35 am
Posted on 7/11/22 at 10:58 am to jb4
A vacationing penguin is driving his car through Arizona when he notices that the oil pressure light is on. He gets out to look and sees oil dripping out of the motor. He drives to the nearest town and stops at the first gas station.
After dropping the car off, the penguin goes for a walk around town. He sees an ice-cream shop and, being a penguin in Arizona, decides that something cold would really hit the spot. He gets a big dish of ice cream and sits down to eat. Having no hands he makes a real mess trying to eat with his flippers. After finishing his ice cream, he goes back to the gas station and asks the mechanic if he's found the problem. The mechanic looks up and says "It looks like you blew a seal."
"No no," the penguin replies, "it's just ice cream."
After dropping the car off, the penguin goes for a walk around town. He sees an ice-cream shop and, being a penguin in Arizona, decides that something cold would really hit the spot. He gets a big dish of ice cream and sits down to eat. Having no hands he makes a real mess trying to eat with his flippers. After finishing his ice cream, he goes back to the gas station and asks the mechanic if he's found the problem. The mechanic looks up and says "It looks like you blew a seal."
"No no," the penguin replies, "it's just ice cream."
Posted on 7/11/22 at 11:00 am to jb4
A priest, a nun, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank. The rabbit says, “I think I’m a Type O.”
Posted on 7/11/22 at 11:00 am to jb4
Did you hear that they put barcodes on the ships in Norway?
They do that so they can Scandinavian.
No matter how still you've been, he's Ben Stiller
I met a microbiologist the other day. He was much bigger than I expected.
They do that so they can Scandinavian.
No matter how still you've been, he's Ben Stiller
I met a microbiologist the other day. He was much bigger than I expected.
This post was edited on 7/11/22 at 11:03 am
Posted on 7/11/22 at 11:05 am to LSUBoo
quote:
Oweo walks in to a bar.
And sits down next to Palmetto98
Posted on 7/11/22 at 11:05 am to jb4
A priest, a rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The bartender takes one look and says "is this some kind of joke?"
Posted on 7/11/22 at 11:06 am to jb4
I was recently at a funeral for my friend and was asked to say a word. I stood up and said “Plethora!” His widow said, “Thank you, that means, a lot.”
Posted on 7/11/22 at 11:51 am to jb4
Q: Why do pigeons fly upside-down over New Orleans?
A: Nothing there is worth shitting on.
A: Nothing there is worth shitting on.
Posted on 7/11/22 at 12:22 pm to TheWalrus
A minister, a priest and a rabbit walk into the bar. The bartender asks the rabbit: "What'll you have."
The rabbit replied, "I'm only here because of auto-correct."
The rabbit replied, "I'm only here because of auto-correct."
Posted on 7/11/22 at 12:28 pm to jb4
I got my wife to help me put some posts in the ground for our new fence. I gave her the new hammer and said,"When I nod my head you hit it."
I don't remember much after that.
I don't remember much after that.
Posted on 7/11/22 at 12:30 pm to jb4
quote:
A Jewish grandfather takes his grandchildren to the beach. They’re playing in the sand when suddenly, a massive wave comes and pulls the smallest grandson out into the water. Panicked, the grandfather prays to God. “Oh God, please bring him back! Please let him live!” Suddenly, an even bigger wave bursts out of the ocean, setting the little boy down right at his grandfather’s feet. He scoops him up into a hug. Then he stares up at the sky and says, “He had a hat.”
I heard this one for the first time the other day on The Old Man (I know it's an old joke). I sat there for a long time trying to figure out if I was missing something.. but I guess the punchline is that the woman's prayers were answered and she still complained. Maybe I'm just unfamiliar with Jewish jokes
Posted on 7/11/22 at 12:32 pm to NonkG
It doesn't matter if you a rich or poor, skinny or fat, pretty or ugly.
At the end of the day.......It's night.
At the end of the day.......It's night.
Posted on 7/11/22 at 12:32 pm to jb4
What's the hardest part of breaking up w/ your Japanese girlfriend?
You have to drop the bomb on her twice before she gets it.
You have to drop the bomb on her twice before she gets it.
Posted on 7/11/22 at 12:34 pm to sweetwaterbilly
Sweetwater, we just watching "The Old Man" this weekend.
It's vintage Bridges and we absolutely loved it.
I heard the same joke and laughed out loud.
It's vintage Bridges and we absolutely loved it.
I heard the same joke and laughed out loud.
Posted on 7/11/22 at 12:40 pm to jb4
Old one I'm sure everyone has heard at some point:
Two guys are fishing off of a pier. They were drinking more beer than catching fish so both had to piss.
First guy unzips and let's loose, and brags to his buddy, "Man, this water is a lot colder than I figured it would be."
His buddy just laughs and says, "Yeah, it's a lot deeper than I thought too."
Two guys are fishing off of a pier. They were drinking more beer than catching fish so both had to piss.
First guy unzips and let's loose, and brags to his buddy, "Man, this water is a lot colder than I figured it would be."
His buddy just laughs and says, "Yeah, it's a lot deeper than I thought too."
Posted on 7/11/22 at 12:43 pm to IAmNERD
A priest, a minister, and a rabbi want to see who is best at his job. So each one goes into the woods to find a bear and try to convert it.
Later, they all get together. The priest begins: "When I found the bear, I read to him from the catechism and sprinkled him with holy water. Next week is his first Communion."
The minister says: "I found a bear by the stream and preached God's holy Word. The bear was so mesmerised that he let me baptise him."
They both look down to the rabbi, who is lying on a stretcher in a full body cast. "Looking back," he says, "maybe I should not have started with the circumcision."
Later, they all get together. The priest begins: "When I found the bear, I read to him from the catechism and sprinkled him with holy water. Next week is his first Communion."
The minister says: "I found a bear by the stream and preached God's holy Word. The bear was so mesmerised that he let me baptise him."
They both look down to the rabbi, who is lying on a stretcher in a full body cast. "Looking back," he says, "maybe I should not have started with the circumcision."
Popular
Back to top
Follow TigerDroppings for LSU Football News