Ted Cruz haircut making rounds today on social media

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At first glance, the haircut, which is tight to the sides and fluffy down the middle like a raccoon tail or a Davy Crockett cap, looks like it might be an undercut. Imagining Ted Cruz walking into a barbershop (?) or a Supercuts and asking for the person in question take it down to a 1 on the sides but to leave the top flowing free, like a horsetail or the pelt of a recently deceased opossum, is humorous if only for a moment, because the end result is so befuddling and also, I’m sorry, fricking hideous.

Here’s a closer look at the side of the hair, so that we might better assess the architecture of this nightmare.

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