You Cringe, You Lose: Eunuch Edition (NSFW)

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Gelding is a “cutter,” which in body-modification circles means he castrates other men. He's also a eunuch himself. After decades of obsessing over his balls and a botched attempt at cutting them off that could have killed him, he was finally castrated in 1994.

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By the early Nineties, Gelding had already decided he had to be castrated. Unlike his doctors he was not prone to deep introspection on the issue. He simply decided it was time for the boys to go. “How can you assign a logical reason to a desire to be castrated?” he asks.

His first attempt was in 1991. After dipping his scrotum in ice water to numb it, he tied off his testicles with rubber bands, and cut off two-thirds of his scrotum with a knife. He was in the throes of a sexual frenzy and felt little pain. “It was like I was outside my body,” he recalls.

But he was in trouble. “You are in a state of sexual excitement, and then your body exhausts the supply of adrenaline. It simply can't continue anymore and you go into clinical shock, which is just about what happened.”

Though close to shock, he maintained his composure long enough to pack a few things and take a cab to the emergency room. The Catholic surgeon on duty made no effort to disguise his disdain. “He was extremely irate and he was rather brutal in his treatment of me,” Gelding says. “He didn't take any measures to stop the blood flow.”

The doctor did stitch his scrotum and assigned a nurse to sit with Gelding, to make sure he wouldn't kill himself. Then a psychiatrist showed up to see if he was crazy. “That's a typical reaction from medical professionals,” he says. “[The psychiatrist] certified that I was perfectly sane, and that this was an event that was unlikely to happen again.”

The psychiatrist was wrong.

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