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re: wife apparently cheated on husband 20 years ago before marriage
Posted on 6/20/21 at 10:33 pm to Pierre
Posted on 6/20/21 at 10:33 pm to Pierre
Dude has no backbone. Sucks she cheated on him before and likely during the marriage too. But his beta behavior encourages it.
She tells him she cheated years ago and his response is to say he'll pray for her. He should've called her out, asked why the F are you telling me this now, how many other dudes have you tengoed with, etc. And basically held his ground and go on offense. But he didn't.
I know another dude whose wife cheated on him within 3 months of the marriage. Again that was a shitty thing for her to do. But in a way I understand it. Because he's the type that's passive, overly placating, always doing what the woman wants to do, etc. Rarely takes the lead. So I can see why she cheated. She just found a dude who would take charge.
Not sure why some (a bunch?) men don't call out females' bs when warranted like here.
She tells him she cheated years ago and his response is to say he'll pray for her. He should've called her out, asked why the F are you telling me this now, how many other dudes have you tengoed with, etc. And basically held his ground and go on offense. But he didn't.
I know another dude whose wife cheated on him within 3 months of the marriage. Again that was a shitty thing for her to do. But in a way I understand it. Because he's the type that's passive, overly placating, always doing what the woman wants to do, etc. Rarely takes the lead. So I can see why she cheated. She just found a dude who would take charge.
Not sure why some (a bunch?) men don't call out females' bs when warranted like here.
0
Posted on 6/20/21 at 10:50 pm to lsunurse
quote:
Dating sucks in your 40s btw
It only sucks if you’re dating someone that acts like a teenager or doesn’t know what he or she wants.
I’ve had a 21 year old, 38 year old, and 48 year old in my 40’s. The one thing they all had in common—-they were self sufficient, wasn’t looking for a free ride, had kids, had a job, and generally had their heads on straight.
They weren’t know it all’s or too bossy. Liked most the same things I do and got along with my kids.
Engaged to the 38 year old now
Posted on 6/20/21 at 10:55 pm to bulldog95
quote:
Dating sucks in your 40s btw
I have some single friends in their 40s and they make it look fun
Of course these guys are successful, good looking, never been married, no kids so they get their pick of women
ETA: mostly date women in their 20s
This post was edited on 6/20/21 at 10:56 pm
Posted on 6/20/21 at 11:03 pm to USMEagles
quote:
it were really just one time before they were even married, who gives a shite?
Not…….a……..chance
Posted on 6/20/21 at 11:20 pm to 777Tiger
quote:
“I’m convinced that dating in your 40s is like digging through the bargain bin at Walmart just trying to find the least damage item that someone else missed”
If you're an attractive man with money and no baggage, your 40s can be great time to date. Obviously you can date women your own age but you're right in the middle of the dating pool. Most any adult female (from the 20s to the 60s) can justify dating you.
The good thing about being a man is that your value can increase over time, especially if you stay in shape. You can remain physically formidable for many years, you can produce children pretty much your entire life, and your net worth will increase.
I believe one reason women are so frickin' crazy is their appeal to men depreciates in almost every way as they age. They peak very early in the qualities that matter most to men, attractiveness and the ability to produce children. All things being equal, a 25 y/o woman is going to be more appealing than her 45 y/o counterpart every time. But because men are more apt to build wealth and status over time, the 45 y/o man is going to have the edge over the 25 y/o in some important qualities that matter a lot to women.
Posted on 6/20/21 at 11:38 pm to lsunurse
quote:
“I’m convinced that dating in your 40s is like digging through the bargain bin at Walmart just trying to find the least damage item that someone else missed”
The key to dating in your 40s is self-awareness. That can't be overstated.
This post was edited on 6/21/21 at 1:50 am
Posted on 6/21/21 at 6:11 am to SCLibertarian
quote:
She doesn't want to be forgiven, she wants out of the marriage. That's the only reason she told him. Since the fling happened before the marriage, he can't use adultery as a grounds for divorce, which means she's still entitled to alimony (in SC, adultery is a total bar to alimony). She is goading him into filing so she can have him subsidize her lifestyle for the rest of her life, while simultaneously taking half his shite. There is no other reason for this to be disclosed 20 years down the road.
I’d stick around out of spite
Posted on 6/21/21 at 7:15 am to Lincoln Dawson
Isn't marriage great?
Posted on 6/21/21 at 7:27 am to SECdragonmaster
Agreed. If you are happy in your marriage, there’s just no purpose in bringing this up.
Posted on 6/21/21 at 7:35 am to NawlinsTiger9
My rule is to consider the circumstance.
If I found out my wife cheated in a drunken moment of weakness, I could probably forgive her. . .given enough time. . .and assuming it wasn't someone I know, or am related to
However if she had cheated twice, that indicates a pattern of behavior. That would be the end, full stop.
If I found out my wife cheated in a drunken moment of weakness, I could probably forgive her. . .given enough time. . .and assuming it wasn't someone I know, or am related to
However if she had cheated twice, that indicates a pattern of behavior. That would be the end, full stop.
Posted on 6/21/21 at 10:57 am to Lincoln Dawson
Cheating is cheating regardless of whether they had a ceremony yet. She's an even bigger piece of shite for admitting this 20 years after the fact. The bigger issue, beyond her being unfaithful, is why she brought it up now. It appears she's either trying to hurt him or force his hand to divorce her.
Whatever way, that's some cold shite she pulled.
Whatever way, that's some cold shite she pulled.
Posted on 6/21/21 at 11:01 am to Gamera
quote:
If you are happy in your marriage, there’s just no purpose in bringing this up.
She's looking to make a second go at it and has someone in mind.
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