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Why is it a faux pas to inquire about cause of death?
Posted on 4/14/14 at 12:54 pm
Posted on 4/14/14 at 12:54 pm
Every time someone dies (especially unexpectedly or young), I know I'm not the only person that wants to ask what happened to them? However, this is socially not proper, so everyone usually asks a trusted friend behind the scenes about the details.
Just wondering why this is a faux pas to ask? I don't mean asking a close family member crying over the casket.
Also, why not report it with the obituary (when COD is known/obvious)?
Just wondering why this is a faux pas to ask? I don't mean asking a close family member crying over the casket.
Also, why not report it with the obituary (when COD is known/obvious)?
15
Posted on 4/14/14 at 12:55 pm to PenguinNinja
Are you this dumb?
Posted on 4/14/14 at 12:55 pm to PenguinNinja
I don't get it. I've always felt the obituaries should list the cause of death.
Posted on 4/14/14 at 12:56 pm to PenguinNinja
Because it's none of your damn business.
Posted on 4/14/14 at 12:56 pm to PenguinNinja
Could be the death was Taboo. Like suicide.
Posted on 4/14/14 at 12:57 pm to Paul Allen
Its private, obituaries aren't a police report. Its a family announcing the passing so people can pay respects. If no one tells you the actual cause of death then you're just not close enough to the family.
Posted on 4/14/14 at 12:58 pm to PenguinNinja
quote:
Also, why not report it with the obituary (when COD is known/obvious)?
This is how we handled it when my sister died. We all agreed that when you see a young person and the obit reads "died suddenly" or "a brief illness", most people assume suicide, so we wanted to nip all of that in the bud, especially since it was so unexpected.
She collapsed at work on a Monday and she died 2 days later- MRI on Monday revealed a brain tumor at the base of her brain, and before the doctors could do exploratory surgery, she had a seizure which caused her brain to swell and she never woke up.
Posted on 4/14/14 at 1:00 pm to Paul Allen
quote:
I've always felt the obituaries should list the cause of death.
Got it. Auto-erotic asphyxiation.
Posted on 4/14/14 at 1:01 pm to Paul Allen
quote:
I don't get it. I've always felt the obituaries should list the cause of death.
The ones in New Orleans used to do so, I recall. They don't anymore, though.
Posted on 4/14/14 at 1:01 pm to PenguinNinja
Because the world doesn't revolve around satisfying your curiosity.
Posted on 4/14/14 at 1:03 pm to PenguinNinja
Because we should mourn their loss no matter the circumstance, even though some more tragic or sudden deaths (like the cyclist hit while training for the Ironman) seem to give us more cause to grieve.
Kind of like when you hear someone has a certain type of cancer like lung cancer, people automatically ask, "Did he smoke?" like that makes cancer suck any less and the person less deserving of our sympathies.
But I know exactly what you mean, and my curiosity always makes me wonder. I even find myself checking the last line of obituaries for where the family wants donations sent, because sometimes that gives you a hint.
BTW, most obits aren't going to list cause of death unless the family wrote it that way, as most are written and paid for by the family.
Kind of like when you hear someone has a certain type of cancer like lung cancer, people automatically ask, "Did he smoke?" like that makes cancer suck any less and the person less deserving of our sympathies.
But I know exactly what you mean, and my curiosity always makes me wonder. I even find myself checking the last line of obituaries for where the family wants donations sent, because sometimes that gives you a hint.
BTW, most obits aren't going to list cause of death unless the family wrote it that way, as most are written and paid for by the family.
This post was edited on 4/14/14 at 1:05 pm
Posted on 4/14/14 at 1:06 pm to PenguinNinja
quote:
Why is it a faux pas to inquire about cause of death?
Because of the Gov't.
HIPAA is exactly why. Many companies(credit cards, utilities, even some mortgage co) will not accept a death certificate if it lists a COD.
Posted on 4/14/14 at 1:07 pm to Paul Allen
quote:
I don't get it. I've always felt the obituaries should list the cause of death.
the Pic in NOLA used to.
Posted on 4/14/14 at 1:10 pm to PenguinNinja
This thread makes me want to go to the doctor to get a check up
Posted on 4/14/14 at 1:13 pm to Rebel
HIPAA does not apply to the media. If the media were to gain access to information from a source which is not deemed a covered entity, then HIPAA has no bearing on the info.
Posted on 4/14/14 at 1:13 pm to The Mick
quote:
If no one tells you the actual cause of death then you're just not close enough to the family.
If someone you know dies and you don't know why you can usually assume it was something shady!
Posted on 4/14/14 at 1:15 pm to tketaco
Yeah. My best friend from HS committed suicide when he was 20, and his family covered it up and lied about it, which just made the whole thing suck even worse than necessary.
Posted on 4/14/14 at 1:27 pm to lsu480
Yes agreed but some things can remain unspoken. Especially for the family's sake.
Posted on 4/14/14 at 1:33 pm to Doc Fenton
quote:
Yeah. My best friend from HS committed suicide when he was 20, and his family covered it up and lied about it, which just made the whole thing suck even worse than necessary.
What did they try to imply as to the cause of death?
Posted on 4/14/14 at 1:39 pm to Y.A. Tittle
quote:Have you learned nothing from this thread?
What did they try to imply as to the cause of death?
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