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Posted on 8/12/15 at 12:59 pm to PawnMaster
Head High School Coach
When something was said that confused coach, in order to confuse us he'd say "No matter how much water a sponge will absorb, a sledge hammer will always break a window."
O-Line Coach
God Bless America you could make the pope cuss.
Yall are starting a grease fire rubbing together like that...HIT SOMEONE.
When something was said that confused coach, in order to confuse us he'd say "No matter how much water a sponge will absorb, a sledge hammer will always break a window."
O-Line Coach
God Bless America you could make the pope cuss.
Yall are starting a grease fire rubbing together like that...HIT SOMEONE.
This post was edited on 8/12/15 at 1:05 pm
Posted on 8/12/15 at 1:02 pm to PawnMaster
*when someone didn't hit hard*
"Y'all are just out there titty bumping"
"Y'all are just out there titty bumping"
This post was edited on 8/12/15 at 9:15 pm
Posted on 8/12/15 at 1:08 pm to SEClint
That is classic.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 1:09 pm to PawnMaster
(no message)
This post was edited on 11/8/20 at 7:55 am
Posted on 8/12/15 at 1:09 pm to PawnMaster
"I'm gonna run you till you die! then I'm gonna run your ghost till he dies!"
Posted on 8/12/15 at 1:17 pm to Phathead
"They are either gonna run left or they are gonna run right. They will NOT run up the middle"
Garidel's thoughts on a West Monroe team featuring future LSU fullback Tommy Banks. Needless to say Banks ran for like 300 yards right up the gut.
Garidel's thoughts on a West Monroe team featuring future LSU fullback Tommy Banks. Needless to say Banks ran for like 300 yards right up the gut.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 1:28 pm to PawnMaster
"Dog shite, do it again!"
Posted on 8/12/15 at 1:30 pm to PawnMaster
Basketball coach used to make us stand underneath the goal and we had to take a charge from someone running full speed from half court. sucked for whoever always had to take one from the guy who played college running back
This post was edited on 8/12/15 at 1:35 pm
Posted on 8/12/15 at 1:30 pm to PawnMaster
My Dad was my coach. He had a tendency to break clipboards over players' helmets. The man bought the things in bulk.
AS freshmen, most of us were bigger than the seniors (five guys from my class played D-1 football at SEC and C-USA schools, four more played division 2). Yearly hazing rituals did not go well for the Seniors that year, we ended up strapping one of them face down to a weight bench, yanking his pants down around his ankles and just leaving him there and went down to the track to get our running in for the day. We come back about 45 minutes and hour later and he's still there calling for someone to help. Dad walks in with us, looks at Jimmy, looks at his freshman team and starts laughing and says, "Jimmy, I'll call your Mama, she'll come get you loose." HIs mom worked in the lunchroom.
He sure enough called her.
Oh the 90's. Today, we would have all been locked up for sexual assault, be sent to Juvie and have to register as sex offenders.
Another favorite was, "Put some ice on it." Friend of mine broke his ankle at practice. Dad had him over on the sidelines with a black hefty bag of ice on his ankle for about an hour before the trainer told him, "Coach, I think we need to call the ambulance."
AS freshmen, most of us were bigger than the seniors (five guys from my class played D-1 football at SEC and C-USA schools, four more played division 2). Yearly hazing rituals did not go well for the Seniors that year, we ended up strapping one of them face down to a weight bench, yanking his pants down around his ankles and just leaving him there and went down to the track to get our running in for the day. We come back about 45 minutes and hour later and he's still there calling for someone to help. Dad walks in with us, looks at Jimmy, looks at his freshman team and starts laughing and says, "Jimmy, I'll call your Mama, she'll come get you loose." HIs mom worked in the lunchroom.
He sure enough called her.
Oh the 90's. Today, we would have all been locked up for sexual assault, be sent to Juvie and have to register as sex offenders.
Another favorite was, "Put some ice on it." Friend of mine broke his ankle at practice. Dad had him over on the sidelines with a black hefty bag of ice on his ankle for about an hour before the trainer told him, "Coach, I think we need to call the ambulance."
Posted on 8/12/15 at 1:34 pm to Artie Rome
Im glad this turned into a Garidel thread.
Me- "Coach, think it'll rain today?"
Garidel- "What do i look like, a damn geologist?"
Me- "Coach, think it'll rain today?"
Garidel- "What do i look like, a damn geologist?"
Posted on 8/12/15 at 1:35 pm to PawnMaster
"I want it so quiet I can hear a rat piss on cotton!"
Posted on 8/12/15 at 2:07 pm to PawnMaster
"If you had the IQ of a turnip you would know....." followed by any point he was trying to make.
"Don't assume it makes an arse out of u and me. Same goes for assumptions on the ball field. If you make an arse of yourself the ump will "tion" you.
"Don't assume it makes an arse out of u and me. Same goes for assumptions on the ball field. If you make an arse of yourself the ump will "tion" you.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 2:11 pm to PawnMaster
100+ degrees out during two-a-days:
"Get out of that water! You'll drown!"
Didn't let us take any water breaks and would chase the trainers off the field.
"God damn, y'all spend more time in the bathroom than a 7th grade girl figuring out how to use a tampon."
"You wanna go? You wanna go a round with me? I'll break your fricking neck you goddamn pussy."
Kids these days have no idea what it was like to go toe-to-toe with the cro-magnons of high school football's past.
"Get out of that water! You'll drown!"
Didn't let us take any water breaks and would chase the trainers off the field.
"God damn, y'all spend more time in the bathroom than a 7th grade girl figuring out how to use a tampon."
"You wanna go? You wanna go a round with me? I'll break your fricking neck you goddamn pussy."
Kids these days have no idea what it was like to go toe-to-toe with the cro-magnons of high school football's past.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 2:35 pm to PawnMaster
"What is this? A circle jerk?"
"All you kids ever talk about is pussy. One day you will learn to appreciate a nice long shite."
"you know what happens when you assume? (chalkboard: arse/u/me)"
"Mung, are you on the f-ing extra point team?"(holding facemask)
no coach
"then get the F off the field you moron!"(smacking helmet)
"Excuses are like arse holes, everyone has one and they all stink"
"Finally i get something out of some of you"(while two guys start puking after sprints during two-a-days in August)
"All you kids ever talk about is pussy. One day you will learn to appreciate a nice long shite."
"you know what happens when you assume? (chalkboard: arse/u/me)"
"Mung, are you on the f-ing extra point team?"(holding facemask)
no coach
"then get the F off the field you moron!"(smacking helmet)
"Excuses are like arse holes, everyone has one and they all stink"
"Finally i get something out of some of you"(while two guys start puking after sprints during two-a-days in August)
This post was edited on 8/12/15 at 2:42 pm
Posted on 8/12/15 at 2:48 pm to PawnMaster
Our baseball coach was about a 5'6 175 lbs coonass and who happened to be coaching us in Bossier. Worst case of little man syndrome I've ever seen. Real high squeaky voce when he yelled. We were talking about our sizes for our tournament shirts one year and pretty much all of us asked for mediums. Somebody that was taking down sizes said "coach, you want a medium too?" He goes "no I'm a man son, men wear larges." The entire team laughed at him cause he was smaller than the entire team.
He would also require the infielders to wear cups. He would do a cup check to us infielders by walking up behind us with a big arse set of keys on a lanyard and swung em between our legs at different times of taking infield. Needless to say, everybody wore a cup after he did it.
He would also require the infielders to wear cups. He would do a cup check to us infielders by walking up behind us with a big arse set of keys on a lanyard and swung em between our legs at different times of taking infield. Needless to say, everybody wore a cup after he did it.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 2:48 pm to PawnMaster
My junior high football coach used to fart at practice followed by a "speak to me ole toothless one."
Posted on 8/12/15 at 2:56 pm to PapaPogey
quote:
That quote was around 2002 I believe
Man, I heard that same crap as a freshman in '96.
Also, "Hey, coach, is it gonna rain today?"
"What do I look like, a geologist?"
Posted on 8/12/15 at 3:01 pm to supatigah
quote:
"set the down screen you white bitch"
Posted on 8/12/15 at 3:06 pm to PawnMaster
My middle school football coach apparently thought all we did during the summer was jack off and eat moonpies and drink soda pops. "Moonpies and soda pops" was said a dozen times each practice the first two weeks.
I played bitch sports in High School, so that's all I really have. My golf coach could draw a perfect circle on the chalk board
. My soccer coach looked so young, he dressed as a student for Halloween, walked into the disciplinarian's office, rudely told him he was sent due to an untucked shirt, and got absolutely reamed by the guy. He only played it for about 30 seconds because he was terrified.
I played bitch sports in High School, so that's all I really have. My golf coach could draw a perfect circle on the chalk board
. My soccer coach looked so young, he dressed as a student for Halloween, walked into the disciplinarian's office, rudely told him he was sent due to an untucked shirt, and got absolutely reamed by the guy. He only played it for about 30 seconds because he was terrified.
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