re: What is your craziest school story?

Robert Scott???

Banged a teacher before banging teachers was cool. You could call me a hipster.

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It would of least been a passable post if the lazy frick took out references to it being a film. Piss poor posting.

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Me and a couple of guys I went to HS with found a "peephole" where we could each watch the girls shower after gym class. My one friend kept getting pissed because the fat-arse gym teacher was in his way and he couldn't see shite. We told him to keep quiet and stay on his side, but the girls started to leave. My friend couldn't take it anymore and screamed for the gym teacher to move her lard-arse out of the way. We were mortified. The gym teacher left, but a couple of the girls stayed behind in the shower and seemed intrigued that we were there watching them. After we were flirting with the girls for a little while, one of the friends took his penis out and put it in the peep hole. His penis was so huge that it fit all the way through the hole and came out on the other side, in full view of the girls. What my friend didn't realize was that another gym teacher, fatter and uglier than the first, had shown up in the shower to whisk the girls away, and she was the only one who remained in the shower. That particular gym teacher had it out for my friend...she was always trying to get him in trouble. She knew it was him on the other side of the peephole and instinctively she ran toward his penis to try to grab it and hold him "hostage" until the principal showed up. I never will forget the primal grunt she made a she approached his penis. She managed to grab it, but my friend fought mightily and was able to wrest his penis out of the grips of the gym teacher.

We quickly ran away, not knowing what was coming next. Well shortly thereafter, we were all called to the principal's office. Everyone was there. Me, my 2 buddies, the coach, the gym teacher who had grabbed my friend's penis in the shower, and the principal. It was awkward from the beginning. The gym teacher kept talking about how she had grabbed my friend's penis through the peephole in the shower. Then, she said the penis she grabbed had an identifying mole on it, and she suggested that all of the guys be subjected to some sort of "lineup" so that she could identify the penis and apprehend the boy who was causing trouble in the shower. It got so awkward that the principal told us we had to use the word "tallywhacker" instead of penis. Coach was losing his mind, he was laughing so hard. One buddy suggested that we put up "wanted posters" all over school in an effort to find the penis and the boy it was attached to. He suggested the posters have a picture of my friend's wanker on them and say "Have you seen this prick? If so, please report it to the principal's office". Coach thought it was hilarious, but the principal and gym coach didn't...but with no proof that we had done anything wrong, we were sent back to class. What a close call that was.....

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Porky's? or whatever that movie was called

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Yes. Porky's. The 1st one was great, and that scene in the principal's office was one of the most hilarious scenes I have ever seen in a movie, Then they went and made 2 sequels, both of which might have been the worst movie's ever made.

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i went to the library once

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I knew the location of the library.

I ran around with a cap gun for 1 semester. For some reason, that seemed cool.

The following story will be in script form, it's better that way.

Bustedsack(BS): "Hey douche, wait up."

Douche(D): "Hey you see that show last night?"

BS: "No, was it good?"

[Asian teacher cuts BS and D off and proceeds to walk slowly in front of them through the hallway]

BS: "D, don't you love the "kung fu" song?"

D: "you mean that ching chong chop stick, they were fighting song?"

[BS and D start singing the "kung fu, ching chong, chop stick" song]

BS/D: "harmonizing"

[Asian teacher stops walking turns around to confront D. While BS continues to very slowly walk to his locker]

Asian teach: "do you have a problem with me?"

D: what makes you think I have a problem?

[Since BS continues to walk he really can't hear the whole conversation now. BS is at his locker now and as he opens it up he heres...]

D: WHO WON THE frickING WAR!

[BS makes an "O" face]

[While walking away from Asian teacher]

D: BS, LET'S frickING GO!

[BS scurries toward D]

BS: Holy shite D, what the frick did Asian teach say to make you yell what you did?

D: fricking zipper head pissed me off. Saying i was harassing him.

BS: hows is singing a song harassment?

D: how the frick do I know?

[BS and D go off to gym class. Later that day they are both called down into the principals office. Both have the option of a 5 day suspension or 3 day suspension with anger management courses. D takes the 5 day while BS takes the 3 day. BS' momma bear would've not taken to kindly to a 5 day.]

I was doing a reading rehearsal for Mass in Church @ a catholic school. the nun teacher left the Church and I grabbed the microphone and sang and danced to this.I was triple dog dared. I got my arse beat and sent to Sister Marie the Baptist.