We're all well aware of "those people" that know how to ruin a good time

But wait til you get a load of this:

An associate and i were engaged in an intense croquet match at the club this morning, when out of nowhere, some bozo dressed in an eagle costume starts flapping in the background and cawing each time we attempted to shoot.

After security failed to respond to our two calls for assistance, I decided to take matters into my own hands, and approached the cretin with my mallet in hand. With the most succinct, conspicuous inflection in my voice, I told him to get lost.

Next thing I know, there is another one of these oafs heckling my associate and yanking the wickets out of the ground. As I prepared to take physical action, security finally came and removed them from the premises.

Long story short: don't be one of those people. It's a beautiful Saturday and I'm just trying to entertain an important associate. Very disappointed in the club, and will be taking my people to the Paragon from now on.