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TulaneLSU's Christmas Pilgrimage V: Top 10 Foibles and Flaws of Clark Griswold
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:30 am
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:30 am
My demographic studies of TD show that the average poster’s age is 35-45, which Chicken tells advertisers is “attractive market segments,” approximately the age of Clark Griswold in Christmas Vacation. Clark is upheld as a paragon of middle-upper class fatherhood by many secular and even some religious people in America in this age range. For many of those who grew up in the 80s and 90s, Clark was a father figure, imbuing many lessons their absent fathers failed to imbue. Such people see him as a comic, lovable figure with a heart of gold and good intentions all around. He is for them the true American father: professionally successful yet focused on providing for his family.
But is this view of Clark Griswold accurate? Does it hold up to scrutiny? Let us objectively look at this man. While judging anyone by today’s standards is a dangerous endeavor, there are certain immutable laws upon which Western Civilization was built. It is by those ethics and standards I propose this study and judgment of Clark W. Griswald. Perhaps by deconstructing role models, whose traits we usually do not examine critically, we may find how certain flaws exist in us, even without realizing it. It is my hope you will have but one true rule model, on whose life it is you base yours, and He is the One revealed at Christmas.
Today, we shall examine TulaneLSU’s Top 10 Clark Griswold Foibles and Flaws.
10. Clark works as a food manipulator.
Many of the health problems in our world originate with Big Food’s manipulation of the food supply. By maximizing the use of synthetic and cheap foods, Big Food has become increasingly profitable, all the while putting in our stores and restaurants foods that are killing us. Does it bother anyone that Clark has made his livelihood from poisoning the public? He brags about his new “cereal varnish,” which prevents milk from penetrating cereal. How can something that he calls a varnish be anything but a carcinogen? What’s worse is he’s proud of giving the American public cancer and diabetes. His invention, he pridefully hopes, will garner him Food Additive Designer of the Year.
9. Clark is prideful.
Ignore for a moment that Clark is willing to poison you and your family to win a meaningless award. Clark’s pride goes far deeper than that. It even infects seemingly innocent family sledding trips. As he polishes his silver saucer sled with another of his carcinogens, he tells all around him that he’s going for the new land sledding speed record. While most honorable fathers make an outing like this about the kids, for Clark, it’s all about him. He is the center of the universe and he can’t even hide this worldview while sledding. Forget that his family depends on him financially. Clark doesn’t care if his children become orphans; to him, a world record is more valuable than their security.
Clark’s pride is revealed in his snobbery as well. While some may call him the everyman, Clark is really an elitist and truly a respecter of peoples. His station wagon doesn’t fool me. He lives in a lily white upper class Chicago suburb. His children go to top notch schools and he has plenty of money to send them to University of Chicago or Northwestern. At last resort, the University of Illinois, which has an average incoming ACT score around 29. His upwardly mobile nouveau riche lifestyle rubs in the face of Cousin Eddie and his family. He openly gloats about his wealth to them, all the while openly expressing his disdain for them. At one point, Clark even tells Eddie and family, “[I’d like to] Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you dead.” What a misanthropic snob.
8. Clark is a theriocidal killer.
When people aren’t watching Clark, innocent animals die. His history of this probably stretches back to childhood, but we first see his debased wickedness come out when he ties Aunt Edna’s dog to his car and attempts to see if it can run 55 MPH. It cannot.
Theriocidal Clark returns in Christmas Vacation. This time, it’s with Aunt Mae’s cat, who first appears wrapped in a box. Rather than liberate the cat, Clark violent shakes it. Surely, the cat gets a brain hemorrhage as a result. Later, Clark sneaks away from dinner -- again escaping family time because he hates his family. No one exactly knows what happens next. The director intimates that Clark haplessly plugs in unplugged Christmas lights (but how did they magically become unplugged). What we do know is that Aunt Mae’s cat, already suffering from brain damage, is fried and dead on the carpet due directly to Clark’s action.
7. Clark is an anti-Semitic misogynist
Ask yourself this: why does Clark wish, “Happy Hanukkah” to the only awkward looking vassal to Frank Shirley? I propose that he is an anti-Semite. As for his misogyny, it’s obvious nearly every time he speaks with his wife. Remember that one scene while they are in bed, nearing sleep. Ellen highlights kindly without a hint of an acrid criticism, some of the things Clark could work on. What does Clark do? He promptly cuts her off and tells her good night, demeaning her and treating her as a second class citizen. For Clark, women have a place in the kitchen or in lingerie. He gives them no value as real persons.
6. Clark shirks family responsibility.
Clark is not a family man. No way, no how. He wishes you believed this about him, but he’s the anti-family man. It’s true that he hamstrings his wife into inviting their families to the Griswold home. But when the families arrive, what does Clark do? Within seconds, he becomes agitated with them. He quickly finds an escape from the duties of hosting, all while pretending to be the consummate family man. He runs outside and starts decorating, ostensibly with his son, although in reality, he just barks orders at poor Rusty.
Later in the evening, when he could be cuddling with his wife, he returns to the outdoor lights. As a result of his prideful quest to have the best lights in town, he oversleeps. He escapes to the attic, avoiding his family again. Supposedly he watches family movies in the attic by himself, but if he truly loved his family, why, again, did he avoid spending time with them? He clearly does not want to go on the planned family shopping excursion. Helen realizes this fact later that day. While selflessly helping Clark’s ambition to raise global temperatures with his 25,000 imported Italian twinkle lights, Helen asks, “Why are you avoiding us?”
But is this view of Clark Griswold accurate? Does it hold up to scrutiny? Let us objectively look at this man. While judging anyone by today’s standards is a dangerous endeavor, there are certain immutable laws upon which Western Civilization was built. It is by those ethics and standards I propose this study and judgment of Clark W. Griswald. Perhaps by deconstructing role models, whose traits we usually do not examine critically, we may find how certain flaws exist in us, even without realizing it. It is my hope you will have but one true rule model, on whose life it is you base yours, and He is the One revealed at Christmas.
Today, we shall examine TulaneLSU’s Top 10 Clark Griswold Foibles and Flaws.
10. Clark works as a food manipulator.
Many of the health problems in our world originate with Big Food’s manipulation of the food supply. By maximizing the use of synthetic and cheap foods, Big Food has become increasingly profitable, all the while putting in our stores and restaurants foods that are killing us. Does it bother anyone that Clark has made his livelihood from poisoning the public? He brags about his new “cereal varnish,” which prevents milk from penetrating cereal. How can something that he calls a varnish be anything but a carcinogen? What’s worse is he’s proud of giving the American public cancer and diabetes. His invention, he pridefully hopes, will garner him Food Additive Designer of the Year.
9. Clark is prideful.
Ignore for a moment that Clark is willing to poison you and your family to win a meaningless award. Clark’s pride goes far deeper than that. It even infects seemingly innocent family sledding trips. As he polishes his silver saucer sled with another of his carcinogens, he tells all around him that he’s going for the new land sledding speed record. While most honorable fathers make an outing like this about the kids, for Clark, it’s all about him. He is the center of the universe and he can’t even hide this worldview while sledding. Forget that his family depends on him financially. Clark doesn’t care if his children become orphans; to him, a world record is more valuable than their security.
Clark’s pride is revealed in his snobbery as well. While some may call him the everyman, Clark is really an elitist and truly a respecter of peoples. His station wagon doesn’t fool me. He lives in a lily white upper class Chicago suburb. His children go to top notch schools and he has plenty of money to send them to University of Chicago or Northwestern. At last resort, the University of Illinois, which has an average incoming ACT score around 29. His upwardly mobile nouveau riche lifestyle rubs in the face of Cousin Eddie and his family. He openly gloats about his wealth to them, all the while openly expressing his disdain for them. At one point, Clark even tells Eddie and family, “[I’d like to] Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you dead.” What a misanthropic snob.
8. Clark is a theriocidal killer.
When people aren’t watching Clark, innocent animals die. His history of this probably stretches back to childhood, but we first see his debased wickedness come out when he ties Aunt Edna’s dog to his car and attempts to see if it can run 55 MPH. It cannot.
Theriocidal Clark returns in Christmas Vacation. This time, it’s with Aunt Mae’s cat, who first appears wrapped in a box. Rather than liberate the cat, Clark violent shakes it. Surely, the cat gets a brain hemorrhage as a result. Later, Clark sneaks away from dinner -- again escaping family time because he hates his family. No one exactly knows what happens next. The director intimates that Clark haplessly plugs in unplugged Christmas lights (but how did they magically become unplugged). What we do know is that Aunt Mae’s cat, already suffering from brain damage, is fried and dead on the carpet due directly to Clark’s action.
7. Clark is an anti-Semitic misogynist
Ask yourself this: why does Clark wish, “Happy Hanukkah” to the only awkward looking vassal to Frank Shirley? I propose that he is an anti-Semite. As for his misogyny, it’s obvious nearly every time he speaks with his wife. Remember that one scene while they are in bed, nearing sleep. Ellen highlights kindly without a hint of an acrid criticism, some of the things Clark could work on. What does Clark do? He promptly cuts her off and tells her good night, demeaning her and treating her as a second class citizen. For Clark, women have a place in the kitchen or in lingerie. He gives them no value as real persons.
6. Clark shirks family responsibility.
Clark is not a family man. No way, no how. He wishes you believed this about him, but he’s the anti-family man. It’s true that he hamstrings his wife into inviting their families to the Griswold home. But when the families arrive, what does Clark do? Within seconds, he becomes agitated with them. He quickly finds an escape from the duties of hosting, all while pretending to be the consummate family man. He runs outside and starts decorating, ostensibly with his son, although in reality, he just barks orders at poor Rusty.
Later in the evening, when he could be cuddling with his wife, he returns to the outdoor lights. As a result of his prideful quest to have the best lights in town, he oversleeps. He escapes to the attic, avoiding his family again. Supposedly he watches family movies in the attic by himself, but if he truly loved his family, why, again, did he avoid spending time with them? He clearly does not want to go on the planned family shopping excursion. Helen realizes this fact later that day. While selflessly helping Clark’s ambition to raise global temperatures with his 25,000 imported Italian twinkle lights, Helen asks, “Why are you avoiding us?”
This post was edited on 11/27/19 at 11:48 am
10
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:30 am to TulaneLSU
5. Clark is a tree poacher.
According to my friends on the Outdoor Board, there’s nothing worse than a poacher. If that’s the case, Clark is the absolute worst. I understand that in the late 1980s artificial trees had not come very far and were indeed very cheap looking. But there were plenty of legal options for Clark. There were plenty of corner lots selling trees in his town. Still, Clark, in his prideful journey to get the “best tree,” drives, and nearly kills his family in the process, to a far-flung Christmas tree farm. But it isn’t good enough for Clark.
Instead, he forces his poor family into the wilderness, where frostbite causes Audrey to become an amputee. On someone else’s property, Clark finds the family tree and unscrupulously scoops it from the ground. He doesn’t care that it won’t fit into his house. He doesn’t care that someone else has paid property taxes on that land and possibly raised that tree from a seedling. What Clarks wants, Clark takes.
Later, when that unsuitable tree catches fire, along with Uncle Lewis, Clark only cares about the tree. Even though an elderly man is aflame, Clark’s primary concern is: “Look what you’ve done to my tree!” Yes, Clark, that poached tree you stole from someone.
4. Clark is a terrible neighbor.
One core commandment of Christ is to love thy neighbor. Before we are at the point of loving, we must first be a good neighbor. Clark isn’t even an okay neighbor. He is the neighbor you dread, the neighbor who causes your home value to plummet. Who would want to live next to this prideful, misogynistic, materialistic pet killer? He makes Cocomo look like a good neighbor.
When his friendly neighbor asks an innocent question about Clark’s illegally begotten tree, Clark responds by saying, “Bend over and I’ll show you” and, with more misogyny, implies he will insert the tree in the neighbor’s wife’s rectum. Can you imagine a neighbor saying something like that to you?
Later, while again avoiding family time, working on the lights, Clark carelessly causes an ice rod to fly from his gutter and into their home. Destroyed are the neighbor’s window, stereo, and carpet. Clark is fully aware of the destructive consequences of his mistake, but never goes over to confess or fix the damage his actions have caused.
Even worse for home values, Clark allows Cousin Eddie to park his hideous RV in the front of their house. When Eddie is spewing raw sewage into the water drain, does Clark stop them? No. Clark finds it mildly amusing, feigns a concern about the potential for explosion, and lets Eddie continue polluting the world, much like with his job in food additives.
3. Clark has no control over his anger.
The hermit writer, Evagrius Ponticus, wrote many things that are remarkably applicable and helpful to individuals today. He is most well known for his eight deadly thoughts, which were recast centuries later as the seven deadly sins. The fifth of his eight deadly thoughts is anger. He writes, “Anger is the sharpest passion. It is said to be a boiling up and a movement of indignation against a wrongdoer or a presumed wrongdoer: it causes the soul to be savage all day long, but especially in prayers it seizes the mind, reflecting back the face of the distressing person. Then sometimes it is lingering and is changed into rancor: [thus] it causes disturbances at night; bodily weakness and pallor; and attacks from poisonous beasts. These four things associated with rancor may be found to have been summoned up by many other tempting- thoughts.”
There is no question that Clark has an anger problem. His inability to control it shows a lack of self control that spills into his final two sins. We can hardly get through two scenes without Clark’s volatile temper steaming over and destroying something new.
Within moments of the film’s opening, Clark finishes singing O Come, Let Us Adore Him and instantaneously transitions to steam emitting from his ears. As Clark goes 40 MPH in the fast lane, a car attempts to get his attention, as to pass him. Rather than shift a little to the right, Clark bursts into road rage. While Helen is praying, Clark is playing a dangerous game of cat and mouse, putting his entire family’s safety, indeed, their lives, on the line. He nearly ends their lives, running into the back of that turquoise Dodge. Rather than stop and collect himself, his rage continues, clouding his judgment. Eventually his anger leads him to the underbelly of an 18 wheeler, where they are saved, divinely guided out of that valley of the shadow of death, as Helen prays the Lord’s Prayer while asking forgiveness for Clark’s sin.
The lesson still not learned, Clark ruins another evening when his lights don’t work. He goes berserk and, like LSU’s first superintendent, destroys everything in his path. That includes all of his son’s hard work. That delightful Santa and reindeer display Rusty spent all day setting up: broken and to the curb by the time Clark’s done with it.
Last, but certainly not least, Clark’s temper tries its best to ruin Christmas for everyone. When he discovers that his boss has tried to save the company by reducing Christmas gifts, Clark the ingrate, inveterate entitled victim breaks out in a profanity-laced tirade:
“ I want my boss brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head. I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, ++++less, hopeless, heartless, fat-+++, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey ++++ he is! Hallelujah! Holy ++++! Where’s the Tylenol?”
Even his father can’t defend this blasphemous monologue. In a private one-on-one, his father essentially tells Clark to call off Christmas, because Clark’s irrepressive temper has ruined it. Too bad for Clark, he isn’t authorized to cancel Christmas. That power is far above him.
According to my friends on the Outdoor Board, there’s nothing worse than a poacher. If that’s the case, Clark is the absolute worst. I understand that in the late 1980s artificial trees had not come very far and were indeed very cheap looking. But there were plenty of legal options for Clark. There were plenty of corner lots selling trees in his town. Still, Clark, in his prideful journey to get the “best tree,” drives, and nearly kills his family in the process, to a far-flung Christmas tree farm. But it isn’t good enough for Clark.
Instead, he forces his poor family into the wilderness, where frostbite causes Audrey to become an amputee. On someone else’s property, Clark finds the family tree and unscrupulously scoops it from the ground. He doesn’t care that it won’t fit into his house. He doesn’t care that someone else has paid property taxes on that land and possibly raised that tree from a seedling. What Clarks wants, Clark takes.
Later, when that unsuitable tree catches fire, along with Uncle Lewis, Clark only cares about the tree. Even though an elderly man is aflame, Clark’s primary concern is: “Look what you’ve done to my tree!” Yes, Clark, that poached tree you stole from someone.
4. Clark is a terrible neighbor.
One core commandment of Christ is to love thy neighbor. Before we are at the point of loving, we must first be a good neighbor. Clark isn’t even an okay neighbor. He is the neighbor you dread, the neighbor who causes your home value to plummet. Who would want to live next to this prideful, misogynistic, materialistic pet killer? He makes Cocomo look like a good neighbor.
When his friendly neighbor asks an innocent question about Clark’s illegally begotten tree, Clark responds by saying, “Bend over and I’ll show you” and, with more misogyny, implies he will insert the tree in the neighbor’s wife’s rectum. Can you imagine a neighbor saying something like that to you?
Later, while again avoiding family time, working on the lights, Clark carelessly causes an ice rod to fly from his gutter and into their home. Destroyed are the neighbor’s window, stereo, and carpet. Clark is fully aware of the destructive consequences of his mistake, but never goes over to confess or fix the damage his actions have caused.
Even worse for home values, Clark allows Cousin Eddie to park his hideous RV in the front of their house. When Eddie is spewing raw sewage into the water drain, does Clark stop them? No. Clark finds it mildly amusing, feigns a concern about the potential for explosion, and lets Eddie continue polluting the world, much like with his job in food additives.
3. Clark has no control over his anger.
The hermit writer, Evagrius Ponticus, wrote many things that are remarkably applicable and helpful to individuals today. He is most well known for his eight deadly thoughts, which were recast centuries later as the seven deadly sins. The fifth of his eight deadly thoughts is anger. He writes, “Anger is the sharpest passion. It is said to be a boiling up and a movement of indignation against a wrongdoer or a presumed wrongdoer: it causes the soul to be savage all day long, but especially in prayers it seizes the mind, reflecting back the face of the distressing person. Then sometimes it is lingering and is changed into rancor: [thus] it causes disturbances at night; bodily weakness and pallor; and attacks from poisonous beasts. These four things associated with rancor may be found to have been summoned up by many other tempting- thoughts.”
There is no question that Clark has an anger problem. His inability to control it shows a lack of self control that spills into his final two sins. We can hardly get through two scenes without Clark’s volatile temper steaming over and destroying something new.
Within moments of the film’s opening, Clark finishes singing O Come, Let Us Adore Him and instantaneously transitions to steam emitting from his ears. As Clark goes 40 MPH in the fast lane, a car attempts to get his attention, as to pass him. Rather than shift a little to the right, Clark bursts into road rage. While Helen is praying, Clark is playing a dangerous game of cat and mouse, putting his entire family’s safety, indeed, their lives, on the line. He nearly ends their lives, running into the back of that turquoise Dodge. Rather than stop and collect himself, his rage continues, clouding his judgment. Eventually his anger leads him to the underbelly of an 18 wheeler, where they are saved, divinely guided out of that valley of the shadow of death, as Helen prays the Lord’s Prayer while asking forgiveness for Clark’s sin.
The lesson still not learned, Clark ruins another evening when his lights don’t work. He goes berserk and, like LSU’s first superintendent, destroys everything in his path. That includes all of his son’s hard work. That delightful Santa and reindeer display Rusty spent all day setting up: broken and to the curb by the time Clark’s done with it.
Last, but certainly not least, Clark’s temper tries its best to ruin Christmas for everyone. When he discovers that his boss has tried to save the company by reducing Christmas gifts, Clark the ingrate, inveterate entitled victim breaks out in a profanity-laced tirade:
“ I want my boss brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head. I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, ++++less, hopeless, heartless, fat-+++, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey ++++ he is! Hallelujah! Holy ++++! Where’s the Tylenol?”
Even his father can’t defend this blasphemous monologue. In a private one-on-one, his father essentially tells Clark to call off Christmas, because Clark’s irrepressive temper has ruined it. Too bad for Clark, he isn’t authorized to cancel Christmas. That power is far above him.
This post was edited on 11/27/19 at 10:38 am
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:30 am to TulaneLSU
2. Clark is an adulterous luster.
Jesus teaches on the Sermon on the Mount: “I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Words the NSFW picture crowd on the OT would do well do read and take seriously.
How does Clark repay Helen for her forgiveness of his adultery with Christie Brinkley? He lusts again. We are at first led to believe that Clark’s motive for building his pool is to bring his family together for fun and fellowship. We later learn, the real reason is he hopes to divorce his wife, leave his family, and entice Mary from Marshall Field’s lingerie section by having a home with a swimming pool.
1. Clark is a blasphemous potty-mouth.
Clarks curses no fewer than 20 times in this film, and I’m not counting saying “sucks” as cursing. This number includes only F, Sh, and A words. He also shoots the bird, a disgusting phallic symbol rooted in violence and intimidation. Far, far worse and more serious than those words and symbol, however, is his blasphemous use of God’s name in vain, which he uses three times. Part of the gradual acceptance by middle class America of the profane use of God’s name comes from Clark Griswold’s specious speech. Nowadays, people and our society think nothing of this grave sin. How far our society has fallen to allow the frequent trespassing of the Second Commandment: Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain; for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain.
Jesus teaches on the Sermon on the Mount: “I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Words the NSFW picture crowd on the OT would do well do read and take seriously.
How does Clark repay Helen for her forgiveness of his adultery with Christie Brinkley? He lusts again. We are at first led to believe that Clark’s motive for building his pool is to bring his family together for fun and fellowship. We later learn, the real reason is he hopes to divorce his wife, leave his family, and entice Mary from Marshall Field’s lingerie section by having a home with a swimming pool.
1. Clark is a blasphemous potty-mouth.
Clarks curses no fewer than 20 times in this film, and I’m not counting saying “sucks” as cursing. This number includes only F, Sh, and A words. He also shoots the bird, a disgusting phallic symbol rooted in violence and intimidation. Far, far worse and more serious than those words and symbol, however, is his blasphemous use of God’s name in vain, which he uses three times. Part of the gradual acceptance by middle class America of the profane use of God’s name comes from Clark Griswold’s specious speech. Nowadays, people and our society think nothing of this grave sin. How far our society has fallen to allow the frequent trespassing of the Second Commandment: Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain; for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain.
This post was edited on 11/27/19 at 10:33 am
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:31 am to TulaneLSU
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:31 am to TulaneLSU
Thanks for reading, my dear friends.
This post was edited on 11/27/19 at 10:32 am
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:33 am to TulaneLSU
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:33 am to TulaneLSU
quote:
My demographic studies of TD shows that the average poster’s age is 35-45
You might need to redo that demographic study
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:36 am to TulaneLSU
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:36 am to TulaneLSU
Clark W. Griswold is a goddamn American icon and you can GTFO with this shite.
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:38 am to TulaneLSU
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:42 am to TulaneLSU
Clark W. Griswold is a great fricking American.
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:43 am to TulaneLSU
I light my farts on fire.
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:43 am to TulaneLSU
Ok your lists were cute and all but now you’ve gone after Father Christmas himself. Clark W Griswold.
frick you sir
frick you sir
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:48 am to TulaneLSU
That was then. Times were different. We didn’t have pussies like you critiquing every little thing we did
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:50 am to 9Fiddy
Clark inspired me to send one of my interns out into the foothills of the Alleghenys in search of the perfect fir for Mrs. S’s Pennsylvania cottage every year at Christmas.
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:51 am to TulaneLSU
I've supported and laughed along with all of your lists...but you do NOT sully the name of tGOAT Christmas movie family man Clark W. Griswold 
Posted on 11/27/19 at 10:58 am to TulaneLSU
quote:
Clark is prideful.
Clark is an anti-Semitic misogynist.
Clark shirks family responsibility.
Clark is a tree poacher.
Clark is a terrible neighbor.
Clark has no control over his anger.
Clark is an adulterous luster.
Clark is a blasphemous potty-mouth.
..I think we've all been there.
Posted on 11/27/19 at 11:01 am to TulaneLSU
This post is by far my new favorite thing about Christmas. Bravo.
Posted on 11/27/19 at 11:03 am to TulaneLSU
Clark is the last true family man.
Posted on 11/27/19 at 11:05 am to TulaneLSU
You shut your pie hole. Clark Griswold is the last true family man.
ETA: Dammit, Upgrayedd
ETA: Dammit, Upgrayedd
This post was edited on 11/27/19 at 11:07 am
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