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re: Parents making uninvited trip to visit , i’m swamped at work this month
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:12 am to BK Lounge
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:12 am to BK Lounge
When I was in this position, my parents would have 100% just waited until October or November instead of saving like $300 on flights
Maybe op should Venmo them a couple hundred dollars because they’re either broke or rude
Maybe op should Venmo them a couple hundred dollars because they’re either broke or rude
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:13 am to Bison
When I was in my 30s and building my career and business, my Dad will always want to pop in and get a cup of coffee. (He was retired)
I was pretty busy and stressed and sometimes I just didn't make the time.
I lost him when I was 38 and I damn sure regret those missed opportunities.
Work will always be there, your parents won't.
I was pretty busy and stressed and sometimes I just didn't make the time.
I lost him when I was 38 and I damn sure regret those missed opportunities.
Work will always be there, your parents won't.
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:13 am to Krane
quote:
Zero surprise that Bison and BK Lounge have shitty relationships with their parents
Leftists seem to struggle with natural relationships.
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:13 am to N2cars
quote:
I lost him when I was 38 and I damn sure regret those missed opportunities.
Work will always be there, your parents won't.
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:20 am to Bison
hopefully they didn't move the trip up due to bad news, like an illness or something. the last time we had a family member do that with us, they told us they had cancer - and wanted to sit down to tell us instead of over the phone.
I truly, truly hope it is not something bad, and they just wanted to see you.
I truly, truly hope it is not something bad, and they just wanted to see you.
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:20 am to Bison
If you love them, just be thankful they want to visit. I don’t have parents who care. Well, one does, the other doesn’t. As I’ve gotten older and closer to retirement, I’ve come to realize work will always be there and my life and family come first. I would re-do this looking back vs always being worried about work. Assuming I’m doing my job well and not slacking. Always remember, you are nothing to your employer and will be replaced immediately if they no longer have use for you (meaning you are a quality employee, but budget cuts, new manager, merger, DEI, whatever) or you die.
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:23 am to N2cars
quote:
We know, don't we?
yes sir, I had a good friend that lost his dad at a fairly young age(dad was young,) we were having beers and he told me to never miss an opportunity to talk to, see, and tell your parents that you love them, I really didn't need prodding in that department but when I just nodded he put his hand on my shoulder and said "I mean that, you don'y know when they'll be gone!" both parents are long gone but I took that to heart, I was at work when my dad died but when my mom was getting near the end I said frick work and I was with her till her last breath, holding her hand
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:23 am to Bison
quote:
When discussing a visit, I asked them to please hold off until late fall. They book the trip anyway ‘ bc tickets were cheaper’ and are coming this weekend.
They are the assholes here.
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:24 am to Bison
Wtf, your parents need an invite. You are one self absorbed sob. I wish my parents could just drop in on me.
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:33 am to Salmon
quote:
Yep.
Prioritizing working for the man over family is definitely how we take back society.
I wonder what all these "frick work, family is way more important" had to say in the maternity/paternity leave thread.
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:33 am to Bison
You are and aren’t an a-hole.
You sound a lot like my second son - he has his life and kind of likes being left alone. I try to do that, but from a dad’s perspective I’ll tell you I die a little inside each time I think about how little we communicate and how infrequently I see him and now my granddaughter.
It’s a tough spot, my only advice is try to look at it through love and see if there isn’t a way to salvage this weekend but also use the time to set some boundaries.
You sound a lot like my second son - he has his life and kind of likes being left alone. I try to do that, but from a dad’s perspective I’ll tell you I die a little inside each time I think about how little we communicate and how infrequently I see him and now my granddaughter.
It’s a tough spot, my only advice is try to look at it through love and see if there isn’t a way to salvage this weekend but also use the time to set some boundaries.
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:33 am to Thracken13
quote:feels like there’s a good chance it’s something like this
hopefully they didn't move the trip up due to bad news, like an illness or something
Coming a couple months “early” because flights were cheaper? Doesn’t fully add up
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:35 am to GreatLakesTiger24
quote:
feels like there’s a good chance it’s something like this
Coming a couple months “early” because flights were cheaper? Doesn’t fully add up
would be ironic if they were coming there to give him his inheritance early or present him with a new car or something
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:35 am to Bison
quote:
Can someone tell me how much of an a-hole I am for feeling this way?
Without knowing the depth of your relationship with your parents, yes I do think you're being kind of an arse.
Work is work. Remember too that pretty much with any company you're just a number and they would get rid of you instantly when given a chance. Don't be obsessed with it and let it run your life, especially when it comes to family/parents. They won't be around forever so enjoy the time together.
A buddy of mine who lives in Denver tells me even though he loves it there, it's hard for him to make friends and no one from home really visits. Be thankful you have some people who want to come all the way out and visit you.
This post was edited on 9/5/24 at 9:50 am
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:36 am to Bison
It's 2-3 days out of your life. It doesn't sound like you have real plans this weekend, but just want to chill. Sorry you don't like watching sports with them. Put on your big boy pants and get thru these few days. Then they will fly back to where they live and you'll be free again. A few days won't kill you and will give them a lot of joy.
Yes, they should have booked when you wanted them to come. But you are being an a-hole as well.
Yes, they should have booked when you wanted them to come. But you are being an a-hole as well.
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:41 am to Bison
“ But still am completed swamped at work.”
Yet still writing love letters in full on TD. Soy boy.
Yet still writing love letters in full on TD. Soy boy.
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:42 am to GreatLakesTiger24
I don't think we really have enough info to go on from OP.
He alludes to the fact that he is the black sheep of the family and has intentionally moved hundreds of miles away.
He may have already had quite a rocky relationship with his parents for years/decades and maybe this uninvited trip is just another item on the list of boundaries OP's parents have flaunted/ignored.
Pure speculation either way.
OP doesn't help his case when he says his plans for the weekend were getting drunk and watching sports on the couch though. Much easier case for him if he had solid plans for the weekend.
He alludes to the fact that he is the black sheep of the family and has intentionally moved hundreds of miles away.
He may have already had quite a rocky relationship with his parents for years/decades and maybe this uninvited trip is just another item on the list of boundaries OP's parents have flaunted/ignored.
Pure speculation either way.
OP doesn't help his case when he says his plans for the weekend were getting drunk and watching sports on the couch though. Much easier case for him if he had solid plans for the weekend.
Posted on 9/5/24 at 9:45 am to JohnnyKilroy
He fricked himself with this line
quote:
I can’t help but feel resentful that instead of being able to get some overtime, or just get drunk and watch football this weekend
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