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I just got audibly cropdusted by a stranger.

Posted on 9/21/16 at 4:42 pm
Posted by facher08
Baton Rouge
Member since Aug 2011
4306 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 4:42 pm
I'm walking down the stairs to leave my building and I come up behind this middle aged, normal looking guy about floor 7 who is walking slower and doesn't let me pass. So I get stuck walking behind him until we get to the bottom and I KNOW he knows I am behind him. We get out of the stairwell into the lobby and I still don't pass him because the distance from the stairwell to the outside door isn't that far. So we are walking out and he starts looking behind him like he is checking to see if someone is behind him and starts digging in his arse followed by a couple of completely audible stink bombs. Like I said, I'm sure this guy knew I was there.

I have been cropdusted by a-hole friends and I'm sure mystery people throughout life, but never by a stranger in a conspicuous fashion as this. Is this just some dude that DGAF or was he establishing some sort of dominance? I couldn't get a look at his knuckles so I did not engage.
Posted by AlbertPoolHoles
Member since Jun 2015
176 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 4:45 pm to
"Establishing dominance" hahahahahaha
Posted by JoePepitone
Waffle House #1494
Member since Feb 2014
10557 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 4:45 pm to
Sorry about that, bruh. My bad.
Posted by monkeybutt
Member since Oct 2015
4583 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 4:47 pm to
Posted by Tactical Insertion
Member since Feb 2011
3205 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 4:47 pm to
He shoulda went with the SBD so you wouldn't have known to hold your breath
Posted by crimsonsaint
Member since Nov 2009
37247 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 4:48 pm to
Would have been so much better if he'd done it in the stairwell.
Posted by Johnny Carson
Member since Jul 2010
1008 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 4:49 pm to
He was seeing if you would respond to his mating call.
Posted by SuperSaint
Sorting Out OT BS Since '2007'
Member since Sep 2007
140462 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 4:50 pm to
quote:

starts looking behind him
you mean at you? since you stated you were behind him right?

quote:

starts digging in his arse
like scratching his cheeks or a fingers in the actual a-hole?

quote:

I couldn't get a look at his knuckles
Damn how deep was he getting in there?
Posted by tigburls
Member since Feb 2010
543 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 4:53 pm to
chem trails
Posted by Thurber
NWLA
Member since Aug 2013
15402 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 5:08 pm to
He clearly DGAF
Posted by Bluefin
The Banana Stand
Member since Apr 2011
13253 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 5:13 pm to
It was a total dominance move. The only way to counter him would've been to say "Your farts remind me of my wife's queefs."

He would've been dumbfounded, and therefore unable to reassert. Keep that in your back pocket for the next time this exact scenario plays out.
Posted by LSUwag
Florida man
Member since Jan 2007
17319 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 5:45 pm to
Alpha
Posted by member12
Bob's Country Bunker
Member since May 2008
32089 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 5:48 pm to
I usually just use my boss's office when I need to fart. He's never there.
Posted by shutterspeed
MS Gulf Coast
Member since May 2007
63192 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 5:54 pm to
Posted by tigersownall
Thibodaux
Member since Sep 2011
15292 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 5:55 pm to
I would have said something. That's bullshite. What do y'all do for a living? Is this semi professional or some McDonald's in a high rise building? Fwiw I farted reading this thread.
Posted by mikrit54
Robeline
Member since Oct 2013
8664 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 5:56 pm to
Posted by Nado Jenkins83
Land of the Free
Member since Nov 2012
59587 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 5:58 pm to
Posted by TygerDurden
Member since Sep 2009
1845 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 6:06 pm to
Its kinda like a wolf pissing on tree marking his territory
Posted by Eightballjacket
Member since Jan 2016
7311 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 6:08 pm to
He probably thought you were staring at his arse the entire time and wanted to send the message that he's not on your team.
Posted by Yewkindewit
Near Birmingham, Alabama
Member since Apr 2012
20013 posts
Posted on 9/21/16 at 6:21 pm to
If I hear or smell one I will ask, "Did you fart?" Sometimes I hear a yes!
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