re: How Porn Hurts Relationships

quote:

---

My wife doesn’t like porn but my girlfriend can’t get enough.

---

FINtastic

quote:

---

That's not what he is saying. He is saying that if your wife isnt putting out, then you need to look inward and become someone she wants to have sex with.

---

Start with communication first. Her reasons might have nothing to do with you.

quote:

---

I'm never clicking on another pecker thread again. This guy is such a douche.

---

I crossed the line by commenting on your habit

What do want, man? You gave an eye-rolling example. I gave you an eye-rolling response. I even prefaced it.

quote:

---

He specifically said take your sexual frustration if your wife isn't putting out and use that in other areas of your life. This isn't healthy. Communication with your partner about your sexual needs is a far superior solution to this.

---

I believe he was being tongue-in-cheek when he said "But Pecker, my wife is hardly ever interested in coitus. What is my sexual outlet going to be if I can't look at amateur MFF A2M assplay and beat off?".

I'm pretty sure his point was that if you feel the need to turn to porn in order to get your rocks off, then you should try putting that pent-up energy into something more productive.

quote:

---

But he did, when he suggested taking your frustration out in other areas of life instead of addressing the root of the issue.

---

Even if he was, why is channeling the energy of your sexual urges into another non-sexual activity bad?

If I'm mad at my brother, I can work that anger and frustration out by going to the gym or for a run. I don't have to punch him in the face in order to healthily express my angry urges.

If a chick doesn't watch porn, she has a low sex drive. Not good

quote:

---

Be someone that you would want to have sex with

---

I'm not getting a sex change

quote:

---

If I'm mad at my brother, I can work that anger and frustration out by going to the gym or for a run. I don't have to punch him in the face in order to healthily express my angry urges.

---

Again, this is not healthy for you. If you are angry with someone, deal with that anger. Don't push it down and use the energy somewhere else. You haven't dealt with the main problem.

Sure if you go to the gym and work out it will give you some benefits, but your relationships will still suffer if your anger is not dealt with in a constructive manner.

Pushing anger down will result in an explosive outburst once you've reached the max of your ability to cope.

quote:

---

If a chick doesn't watch porn, she has a low sex drive. Not good

---

bullshite. my wife aint into porn and her sex drive is pretty damn high.

quote:

---

Definitely authored by a woman. They all scream for equality, but are threatened by the though of it. Porn drives down the power of the poosay. Their control over male orgasms is a source of strength for them. They withhold it for money, power, and security. If men are getting off at will, without them, they're just an expensive doll that makes noise and bleeds a lot.

---

If this were put on a plaque and placed all over the campuses of Wellesley and Sarah Lawrence, the world would be a better place. Especially if we keep the spelling of "poosay." Some of them need to see it spelled like that. Just because.

quote:

---

Again, this is not healthy for you. If you are angry with someone, deal with that anger. Don't push it down and use the energy somewhere else. You haven't dealt with the main problem.

---

You are talking about something different than what I am talking about.

You are talking about where the feelings/urges are coming from. I'm talking about the feelings/urges themselves.

To stick with my example, "talking it out" with my brother isn't necessarily going to make the anger subside. What if we're at an impasse? What if he's done something to me that is truly deserving of my anger. You talk about "communication" as if it's some sort of silver bullet, and only if we'd just communicate then everyone would be happy. That's not always the case. Hell, sometimes continuing to communicate only makes the situation worse if tempers are flaring.

quote:

---

Sure if you go to the gym and work out it will give you some benefits, but your relationships will still suffer if your anger is not dealt with in a constructive manner.

---

Me blowing off steam at the gym instead of punching my brother in the face is a much better way of building the relationship, no?

Just because I'm taking out my angry urges in another format doesn't mean that I'm not stewarding my relationship with my brother.

quote:

---

Pushing anger down will result in an explosive outburst once you've reached the max of your ability to cope.

---

Again, we're talking about two different things. And it's not an either/or situation.

Returning to the topic at hand...expressing sexual energy through alternative channels doesn't mean that you are avoiding healthy communication with your partner.