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re: How much did your divorce cost?
Posted on 9/12/25 at 5:36 am to BabyTac
Posted on 9/12/25 at 5:36 am to BabyTac
Mine was amicable. We agreed on even split of proceeds from selling the house and had already divided the rest of our “stuff”. Our earnings were close to the same as were our retirement accounts so nobody was asking for alimony or palimony and we agreed that I would get domiciliary custody of our kid and what visitation would be. I didn’t ask for child support. We paid a young lawyer to file everything and it all came out to a little over 3 grand.
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Posted on 9/12/25 at 6:06 am to Napoleon
quote:
You can do everything without lawyers if it's an uncontested divorce without kids.
I did it without lawyers and with kids. $800. I have custody, no child support but I'm still paying for her student loans which is 400 a month. She doesn't have a job. She forged my name years ago and now I'm on the hook. The cops wouldn't touch it - civil matter. frick it. I'm constantly negotiating with the loan department to try and get out of it.
Posted on 9/12/25 at 6:19 am to BabyTac
It depends....
If you have a lot of assets, it will be milked and dragged out as long as possible with attorney fees racking up.
If you are poor, you will get a quick and speedy settlement.
When my father and mother got divorced, he wanted to do it without lawyers and use family for negotiations lol. He would often tell her that here is a bowl full of soup. I have a spoon and you have a spoon. If a third spoon comes in the mix you will get less spoonfuls out of the bowl.
It did not work thought.
If you have a lot of assets, it will be milked and dragged out as long as possible with attorney fees racking up.
If you are poor, you will get a quick and speedy settlement.
When my father and mother got divorced, he wanted to do it without lawyers and use family for negotiations lol. He would often tell her that here is a bowl full of soup. I have a spoon and you have a spoon. If a third spoon comes in the mix you will get less spoonfuls out of the bowl.
It did not work thought.
Posted on 9/12/25 at 6:25 am to BabyTac
I am at around 8k into mine and we still haven’t resolved the community property after 4 years.
Needless to say my ex wife is a toxic, high conflict, idiot who is getting hustled by her divorce attorney to drag on a simple case.
Without question, it has been worth EVERY SINGLE PENNY.
Needless to say my ex wife is a toxic, high conflict, idiot who is getting hustled by her divorce attorney to drag on a simple case.
Without question, it has been worth EVERY SINGLE PENNY.
This post was edited on 9/12/25 at 6:26 am
Posted on 9/12/25 at 6:48 am to BabyTac
I lost everything and it was the best thing to every happen to me outside of Christ.
Posted on 9/12/25 at 6:55 am to WhuckFistle
quote:
Obligatory, 350
Literally $350 for the lawyer fee. Plus 1/3 of my 401k at the time, 14 years ago.
We worked everything out before filing. I kept the house, son would live with me and see her on the weekends, and I agreed to pay a small amount for child support. Couldn't have been more amicable and I still can't believe she never got legal advice. She had like $30k in credit card debt, and I could have been made liable for some or half of it.
Posted on 9/12/25 at 8:17 am to BabyTac
Easily over $100K for me when all was said and done. That includes lawyers fees, property settlement, child support payments, etc.
Oh, and this was back in the mid 80's, so it stung pretty hard.
Oh, and this was back in the mid 80's, so it stung pretty hard.
Posted on 9/12/25 at 8:42 am to Naked Bootleg
quote:
son would live with me ... and I agreed to pay a small amount for child support
I don't understand how this all works. If you are the primary caregiver, how does it still end up that you have to pay them for taking care of your child? Just genuinely trying to understand how men are so easily on the hook for everything financially no matter what.
Posted on 9/12/25 at 8:54 am to BabyTac
Lawyer fees, multiple filing fees about 15-20k but I made sure I got 50/50 custody so it was worth every penny to my daughter and I.
Assets- I fought multiple attempts of unreasonable and insane settlement offers so that racked up attorney fees. Held steadfast and won. We never opened joint accounts so she kept her cash accounts and I kept mine. Same with our retirement accounts which was definitely in her best interest since she was able to bank much more of her salary for years bc I was paying the entire mortgage. She wanted to keep the house so she had to pay me a high premium in the buyout.
While I make a higher salary by about 20%, since I have 50/50 custody monthly child support is minimal. Her legal fees were much higher than mine and she was so unreasonable that multiple attorneys who dropped her bc they didn’t want to deal with such an unreasonable client based on what they told my attorney.
My attorney said she had never seen somebody like this who was so incapable of rational thought that attorneys were turning down her case. I laughed and said now imagine living with that level of crazy every single day.
Assets- I fought multiple attempts of unreasonable and insane settlement offers so that racked up attorney fees. Held steadfast and won. We never opened joint accounts so she kept her cash accounts and I kept mine. Same with our retirement accounts which was definitely in her best interest since she was able to bank much more of her salary for years bc I was paying the entire mortgage. She wanted to keep the house so she had to pay me a high premium in the buyout.
While I make a higher salary by about 20%, since I have 50/50 custody monthly child support is minimal. Her legal fees were much higher than mine and she was so unreasonable that multiple attorneys who dropped her bc they didn’t want to deal with such an unreasonable client based on what they told my attorney.
My attorney said she had never seen somebody like this who was so incapable of rational thought that attorneys were turning down her case. I laughed and said now imagine living with that level of crazy every single day.
This post was edited on 9/12/25 at 8:55 am
Posted on 9/12/25 at 10:19 am to BabyTac
0
Posted on 9/12/25 at 10:40 am to BabyTac
Going through one now and it's completely amicable. It's going to cost just short of $1,500, which is simply legal and filing fees.
Posted on 9/13/25 at 5:54 pm to BabyTac
$40k lawyers
$150k fair division of assets
$100k stolen division of assets
$250k lost future savings by refi and losing my 2% interest rate
Over half a million I figure for a middle class middle age guy.
For no good reason.
Devestating!
$150k fair division of assets
$100k stolen division of assets
$250k lost future savings by refi and losing my 2% interest rate
Over half a million I figure for a middle class middle age guy.
For no good reason.
Devestating!
Posted on 9/13/25 at 6:10 pm to BabyTac
A child and my mind.
I was emotionally screwed up for at least 5 years and others say a lifetime. No one should choose to go through that crap.
Decades later, I regularly dig through the mud in my mind and try to think of what I could have done in my part to change the course of that action. Years passed and my ex and I both said if we could have seen another direction, we should have taken it. Hind sight.
I readily admit that I owned at least half of that divorce.
I was emotionally screwed up for at least 5 years and others say a lifetime. No one should choose to go through that crap.
Decades later, I regularly dig through the mud in my mind and try to think of what I could have done in my part to change the course of that action. Years passed and my ex and I both said if we could have seen another direction, we should have taken it. Hind sight.
I readily admit that I owned at least half of that divorce.
Posted on 9/13/25 at 6:14 pm to Ba Ba Boooey
quote:and yet you married her
I laughed and said now imagine living with that level of crazy every single day.
Posted on 9/13/25 at 6:38 pm to Bamadiver
quote:
ust under $350, no joke. Cut a check for $342 to her lawyer to pay the filing.
Mine was $1200. Not that big of a deal, really. No hard feelings from either of us. Prolly why we divorced each other.
Posted on 9/15/25 at 4:50 pm to Jon A thon
quote:
I don't understand how this all works. If you are the primary caregiver, how does it still end up that you have to pay them for taking care of your child? Just genuinely trying to understand how men are so easily on the hook for everything financially no matter what.
We worked everything out first. It wasn't something a judge or state decided. I was willing to give her.. I think it was $165/mo as part of our agreement. I knew he wouldn't be at her house most weekends but I was willing to offer it just to avoid a typical divorce and the custody/property battle. And being on the hook for the mountain of credit card debt she racked up on stupid shite..
Posted on 9/15/25 at 4:51 pm to Naked Bootleg
Around $30,000
Posted on 9/15/25 at 5:17 pm to BabyTac
Amicable and half.
Posted on 9/15/25 at 5:22 pm to BMoney
quote:
$1,500, which is simply legal and filing fees.
Posted on 9/15/25 at 5:25 pm to BabyTac
20k for the first
10k for the second
10k for the third
At the end of the day, I should’ve fought harder to keep the first.
10k for the second
10k for the third
At the end of the day, I should’ve fought harder to keep the first.
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