re: How do you effectively control your temper when you find yourself getting angry?

I struggled with it big time in the past, especially with wife and kids when they say something or do something I find dumb….so I started praying a lot and now when I feel myself getting angry or about to pop off, I try…emphasis on try, to stop and say a prayer or two. Helps me

This will be a spiritual answer so skip if you want.

The solution is not to work on your anger but to increase your self-control.
Self-control is a fruit of the Spirit from Gal. 5:22-23. It is grown in us by the Holy Spirit through our growing relationship to Him. A lot more could be shared here.

Anger is actually a needed emotion. But we are also admonished to "be angry but sin not". It's not that you are angry, but what you do in response to your anger.

This is a real problem in today’s society. Emotional intelligence just doesn’t seem important to the masses. Anger hurts people but it’s also a jail cell to the person who lives in it. I grew up around rage and anger and the one thing I don’t want in my life is anger..
Proverbs is fantastic for helping to understand anger.
Daily I read proverbs and daily recite this verse 16:32
Whoever is slow to anger is greater than the mighty and he who controls his spirit than he who takes a city.
I have been working on my emotions for years and it’s still a daily progress. I just know that my life is so much better at home and work when I don’t allow myself to be filled with angry emotions. I just don’t give it that power over my day or the moment.

I suggest prayer. If that's not your thing, just consider the consequences of your actions, carefully.

I've always had issues with anger. I'm normally pretty chill but there have been times where it gets extreme. I know I'm about to do something I'm really going to regret, but I do it anyway. And lose my mind.

When I was in the Army for over 20 years, I had an outlet. After I retired, it was a few years of adjustment. My 3rd wife (yes my anger had a lot to do with the 2 divorces) has been a real savior. And I mean it.

She helps me realize that I have a hell of a lot to be thankful for and there's nothing worth getting worked up over.