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Today in History: July 26

1526 Lucas Vazquez de Ayllon and colonists leave Santo Domingo for Florida.

1759 The French relinquish Fort Ticonderoga in New York to the British under General Jeffrey Amherst.

1775 The Continental Congress establishes a postal system for the colonies with Benjamin Franklin as the first postmaster general.

1948 In an Executive Order, President Harry Truman calls for the end of discrimination and segregation in the U.S. armed forces.

2005 The shuttle Discovery launches on mission STS-114, marking a return to space after the shuttle Columbia crash of 2003.


Born on July 26

1875 Carl Jung, Swiss psychologist.

1928 Stanley Kubrick, film director (Spartacus, 2001: A Space Odyssey).

1943 Mick [Michael Phillip] Jagger, musician, member of the Rolling Stones.


Joke of the Day

These three guys die together in a tragic accident and they all go to heaven

When they get there, St. Peter greets them and tells them, "We only have one rule here in heaven. Don't step on the ducks."
So, they enter heaven and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place.
It's almost impossible not to step on a duck there's so many, and though they try their utmost to avoid standing on them, the first guy soon accidentally steps on one.
St. Peter then appears with the ugliest woman the guy had ever seen.
St. Peter chains the woman to the guy and says to him, "Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to this ugly woman!"
The next day, the second guy also accidentally steps on a duck. Once again, St. Peter shows up and with him is another extremely ugly woman. He chains the woman to the second guy saying, "Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to this ugly woman!"
The third guy has observed all this and as he really doesn't want to be chained to an ugly woman for eternity, he's extremely careful where he steps.
Indeed, he manages to go months without stepping on any ducks. One day though, St.Peter appears with the most gorgeous woman the guy has ever laid eyes on. She's tall, curvaceous, tanned and extremely sexy.
Without a word, St. Peter chains the woman to the third guy.
The guy happily says to the woman, "I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all eternity?"
The woman replies, "I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck."