- My Forums
- Tiger Rant
- LSU Recruiting
- SEC Rant
- Saints Talk
- Pelicans Talk
- More Sports Board
- Fantasy Sports
- Golf Board
- Soccer Board
- O-T Lounge
- Tech Board
- Home/Garden Board
- Outdoor Board
- Health/Fitness Board
- Movie/TV Board
- Book Board
- Music Board
- Political Talk
- Money Talk
- Fark Board
- Gaming Board
- Travel Board
- Food/Drink Board
- Ticket Exchange
- TD Help Board
Customize My Forums- View All Forums
- Show Left Links
- Topic Sort Options
- Trending Topics
- Recent Topics
- Active Topics
Started By
Message
Florida guy covers all in one shot - Public Masturbation, Cocaine, Altima, AR-15, Sock
Posted on 7/2/26 at 9:36 am
Posted on 7/2/26 at 9:36 am
quote:
MIAMI SPRINGS, Fla. — A South Florida man with a gun in his pocket had his hand elsewhere on Tuesday, according to police. Authorities said a call about the 30-year-old publicly masturbating in a Nissan Altima outside of a Miami Springs hotel led officers to discover cocaine and a second weapon.
https://www.local10.com/news/local/2026/07/01/call-about-man-masturbating-in-nissan-altima-spurs-ar-15-cocaine-discovery-in-miami-springs-police/
quote:
Authorities said it all happened just before 2:30 p.m. outside of the Red Roof Plus at 3401 NW Le Jeune Road.
Miami Springs police said a woman saw Kenton Torrell Williams “watching porn on his cellphone while having his penis exposed and masturbating” while in the burgundy sedan; she told him she was going to tell the front desk.
Police said she came back 30 minutes later and saw Williams, of Miami Gardens, still at it.
According to an arrest report, she then told him “she was going to call the police on him.”
That apparently did not deter Williams, according to police.
The report states that Williams got out of his car when an officer arrived and the officer saw him “with his pants below his groin area, exposing his underwear and with a black sock wrapped around his penis.”
As the officer handcuffed him, Williams said “I have a gun in my pocket,” leading the officer to find a small pistol, according to the report.
Police said after the officer asked if there were any more guns, Williams replied, “There is a rifle in the passenger seat but everything is clean, you can look anywhere you want.”
Everything was not clean, police said. Besides the AR-15, they said the officer found “a purple Crown Royal bottle bag containing a small clear Ziploc baggie” of powder cocaine. They said they also found a scale “and packaging materials consistent with the sale of narcotics.”
quote:
“I asked (Williams) why was he masturbating inside of his vehicle, to which he responded, ‘everybody has their kinks and I was molested as a child,’” the arresting officer wrote in the report. “I then questioned (him) on the narcotics located in his vehicle to which he responded, ‘I don’t sell drugs; I’m an addict.’”
Police arrested Williams on charges of armed drug possession, possession of drug paraphernalia and indecent exposure.
Posted on 7/2/26 at 9:38 am to Shexter
quote:
“I asked (Williams) why was he masturbating inside of his vehicle, to which he responded, ‘everybody has their kinks and I was molested as a child,’” the arresting officer wrote in the report. “I then questioned (him) on the narcotics located in his vehicle to which he responded, ‘I don’t sell drugs; I’m an addict.’”
Well, at least he's honest...
Posted on 7/2/26 at 9:39 am to Shexter
(no message)
This post was edited on 7/2/26 at 9:58 am
Posted on 7/2/26 at 9:40 am to Shexter
It is not that hard to find a quiet place to beat off in your car.
Posted on 7/2/26 at 9:40 am to Shexter
I am impressed with his nonchalance regarding kink and addiction. 
Posted on 7/2/26 at 9:41 am to RohanGonzales
quote:
It is not that hard to find a quiet place to beat off in your car.
And he did just that... until some Karen got up in his grill.
Posted on 7/2/26 at 9:50 am to SallysHuman
Red Roof Plus. This must be the high end accommodation.
Is this like a Ritz-Carlton?
Is this like a Ritz-Carlton?
Posted on 7/2/26 at 9:53 am to SallysHuman
A man that may have achieved all his goals in life in one afternoon and at a young age.
America!
America!
Posted on 7/2/26 at 9:55 am to Shexter
quote:That’s some determination
Miami Springs police said a woman saw Kenton Torrell Williams “watching porn on his cellphone while having his penis exposed and masturbating” while in the burgundy sedan; she told him she was going to tell the front desk.
Police said she came back 30 minutes later and saw Williams, of Miami Gardens, still at it.
According to an arrest report, she then told him “she was going to call the police on him.”
That apparently did not deter Williams, according to police.
Posted on 7/2/26 at 10:01 am to Shexter
quote:
Police said after the officer asked if there were any more guns, Williams replied, “There is a rifle in the passenger seat but everything is clean, you can look anywhere you want.”
Everything was not clean, police said.
I read this in an Arrested Development narrator voice
Posted on 7/2/26 at 10:06 am to SallysHuman
quote:
It is not that hard to find a quiet place to beat off in your car.
And he did just that... until some Karen got up in his grill.
Agreed, except he forgot to get that “total blackout” window tint on that Altima before he decided to engage in his “self gratification” in it.
Posted on 7/2/26 at 10:32 am to Seth Bullock
quote:
3 bullets in a 30 round mag
There appears to be more in the magazine, but zero sights on the AR Pistol. Just going off shear luck and a general direction when shooting at someone I reckon.
This post was edited on 7/2/26 at 10:34 am
Posted on 7/2/26 at 10:44 am to Shexter
quote:
black sock wrapped around his penis.”
Racist. What does he have against white socks? They are beautiful as well
Posted on 7/2/26 at 10:45 am to Shexter
quote:
Police said she came back 30 minutes later and saw Williams, of Miami Gardens, still at it.
Damn, that's a long time to be stroking it.
Baw must have a serious porn addiction.
Posted on 7/2/26 at 11:35 am to Shexter
quote:
she told him she was going to tell
Snitches get jizzes.
Posted on 7/2/26 at 11:38 am to Seth Bullock
quote:
3 bullets in a 30 round mag
when you're thugging on a budget.
Posted on 7/2/26 at 11:42 am to Shexter
this much disregard for the law, ar15 at the ready in the passenger seat, no impulse control, drugs, this dude should be locked up for a long time, or just shot like a feral dog
he will kill somebody at some point
he will kill somebody at some point
Posted on 7/2/26 at 11:42 am to Shexter
Blacks absolutely hate putting sights on their ARs
Popular
Back to top
12















