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Started By
Message
re: Did this girl just fall into my lap? (no pics)
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:03 am to TDTGodfather
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:03 am to TDTGodfather
quote:
have you ever met a 20 yr old emotionally mature enough not to mention financially stable enough to raise a child?
Yes, met plenty. It use to not be anything odd for a 20 year old to be a fully mature adult already married and with a kid, maybe two.
2
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:03 am to Col reb 2011
quote:
Shes a dental hygienist
Color me shocked
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:04 am to Tiger Ryno
quote:
So she is 22. Has a 2 year old and is not married to the father. Lives with parents. Smokes weed. Smokes cigarettes.
he needs to run asap
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:04 am to TigerHam85
quote:
Shes a dental hygienist
Color me shocked
I was going to guess a cosmetology student.
ETA: Seriously, this thread sucks worse than I thought it would.
This post was edited on 7/15/14 at 9:05 am
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:04 am to Thib-a-doe Tiger
quote:
She puts out bro, has the frick trophy to prove it
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:07 am to TDTGodfather
quote:
have you ever met a 20 yr old emotionally mature enough not to mention financially stable enough to raise a child?
I think this has to do with the infantilization of adults in American society. 50 years ago, teenagers were entrusted with more financial and social responsibility. Parents didn't bother to keep the kinds of tabs on their kids that parents today do. After high school graduation, there were so many more career paths available to them without any kind of further education. That meant that someone who was 20 years old could have been working a career job for 2 years while having already worked for that company for 2 years prior to that. They could very well have already afforded their own place and been living in it for over a year. It's easy to see how someone 20 years old could have been married with a home and a kid at 20 in the past. However, those opportunities don't really exist anymore. Most jobs require at least a couple years of some kind of education past high school in order to get a job. That delays real income earning for 2-5 years past 18 for most Americans. That means 2-5 years before Americans are making enough money to buy/lease their own homes, get married, and start paying more taxes. With the poor job market, high tuition costs, student loan debt, and ever-increasing housing costs in places where jobs are available, that point where citizens can start retaining enough income to afford marriage and children is being delayed even further, often into their 30s when child birth starts to become increasingly more risky.
It's a huge issue that's not really being addressed.
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:07 am to LesMiles BFF
quote:
Seriously, this thread sucks worse than I thought it would.
Most likely that was the intent of the OP.
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:09 am to Col reb 2011
quote:
My question is how I should go about it..
You get into a relationship with her then you inherit all of her problems and drama.
Think about that long and careful.
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:12 am to donRANDOMnumbers
OP you will find as u age women will have a history. Be it a kid, ex-husband, long term x, etc.
If they do not they are crazy.
27 and 22 is tough itself. Then add a kid? She may "hit and quit" you?? She got knocked up right out oh high school and jacked up her party years. Weekends the baby is gone she will party. As time goes by she may not want to deal with you creaky creeping toward 30 arse.
If they do not they are crazy.
27 and 22 is tough itself. Then add a kid? She may "hit and quit" you?? She got knocked up right out oh high school and jacked up her party years. Weekends the baby is gone she will party. As time goes by she may not want to deal with you creaky creeping toward 30 arse.
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:12 am to Darth_Vader
quote:
Yes, met plenty. It use to not be anything odd for a 20 year old to be a fully mature adult already married and with a kid, maybe two.
it used to not be anything to not have air conditioning and indoor plumbing.
doesn't mean it's better. while the situations and maturity levels of random 20 yr olds can vary, the odds are in that kids favor when he has two parents that can provide for him/her and not struggle and view the child as a burden or eventually resent them.
not to mention emotionally mature. a parent needs to be emotionally mature to not eff up a child. sure there are 60 yr olds that suck at being parents their entire lives and 18 yr old super parents, but if you're playing the odds...
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:13 am to Col reb 2011
There are so many 22 year old women without kids. Stop with the scarcity mindset, unless you don't mind the kid.
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:13 am to LSU alum wannabe
quote:
you creaky creeping toward 30 arse.
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:14 am to TigerHam85
quote:
Shes a dental hygienist
Color me shocked
I think you're confusing assistants with hygienists. Assistants need no formal education, but hygienists have a college degree and must pass boards.
This post was edited on 7/15/14 at 9:15 am
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:17 am to kingbob
quote:
I think this has to do with the infantilization of adults in American society. 50 years ago, teenagers were entrusted with more financial and social responsibility. Parents didn't bother to keep the kinds of tabs on their kids that parents today do. After high school graduation, there were so many more career paths available to them without any kind of further education. That meant that someone who was 20 years old could have been working a career job for 2 years while having already worked for that company for 2 years prior to that. They could very well have already afforded their own place and been living in it for over a year. It's easy to see how someone 20 years old could have been married with a home and a kid at 20 in the past. However, those opportunities don't really exist anymore. Most jobs require at least a couple years of some kind of education past high school in order to get a job. That delays real income earning for 2-5 years past 18 for most Americans. That means 2-5 years before Americans are making enough money to buy/lease their own homes, get married, and start paying more taxes. With the poor job market, high tuition costs, student loan debt, and ever-increasing housing costs in places where jobs are available, that point where citizens can start retaining enough income to afford marriage and children is being delayed even further, often into their 30s when child birth starts to become increasingly more risky.
It's a huge issue that's not really being addressed.
yeah i agree. it's just how things were and how things are now. and now 20 yr olds are a lot less mature (generally speaking) than in other times.
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:17 am to TigerHam85
quote:
From someone who has been through practically the exact same issue, it's not worth it. The kid will always have priority. You'll be called upon for daddy duties that you don't want, nor should you want. Honestly, what I did is what I would recommend. frick her for a few months, don't play the daddy roll in front of the kid. Avoid "family" things, then get drunk and break her heart and tell her that things would have been great if she would have made him wear a condom.
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:17 am to Darth_Vader
quote:
It use to not be anything odd for a 20 year old to be a fully mature adult already married and with a kid, maybe two.
Yes, it certainly was not uncommon, but let's not pretend they were all mature and prepared. It was just the norm then.
My parents were married and had a kid by 19. But they will admit that they were not mature and ready for that at the time and wish they would have waited.
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:18 am to pointdog33
quote:
but hygienists have a college degree and must pass boards.
I'm pretty sure he's referring to them being sluts more times than not
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:21 am to TDTGodfather
quote:
it used to not be anything to not have air conditioning and indoor plumbing.
doesn't mean it's better. while the situations and maturity levels of random 20 yr olds can vary, the odds are in that kids favor when he has two parents that can provide for him/her and not struggle and view the child as a burden or eventually resent them.
not to mention emotionally mature. a parent needs to be emotionally mature to not eff up a child. sure there are 60 yr olds that suck at being parents their entire lives and 18 yr old super parents, but if you're playing the odds...
I was simply answering his question. And yes, it use to be quite normal for society to expect a 20 year old to be a mature adult capable of being a spouse and parent. This notion of waiting until you're in your late 20's or even into your 30's to have kids and settle down is a new trend....
As you can see in the US in 1970 the median age for a woman to marry was 20 and to have a child by 21 or 22.
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:23 am to Col reb 2011
She has a kid, means she's dtf
Posted on 7/15/14 at 9:24 am to Tiger Ryno
No way the OP is serious if way Ryno posted
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