re: Depression: Has anyone been dealing with it more and more lately?

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But what if they’re not? What if they’re actually functioning exactly as intended. We are supposed to feel pain.

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No! No, you're not supposed to feel pain. Pain means something is wrong.

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Pain is an expert motivator.

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Yes, it can be a motivator and should motivate you to seek out the source of psychological pain and then either change it or change yourself to the point that it doesn't hurt you anymore.

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We learn not to touch a hot stove because we get burnt and it hurts. Now, imagine not feeling pain when you touch a hot stove. Rather than pull your finger away quickly, you would let it linger. Instead of having a minor surface burn or at most a blister, you could deal serious damage to your finger as it keeps burning, but because you don’t feel pain resulting from that damage, you don’t react in a way to stop the damage.

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I don't like anologies that imply a similarity between physical pain and psychological/brain pain. What you are describing is masochism. While psychological pain can lead to a desire for a physical pain mask, it is just that, a mask. It's an attempt to hide a psychological injury behind a physical injury.

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I can’t help but feel like I am meant to feel that pain. It isn’t there to kill me, or else it already would have. It’s there to push me. I shouldn’t be content with my life as it is. I need to make changes. If it didn’t hurt so damn bad, I likely wouldn’t push so hard to change. I NEED the pain to overcome my complacency and fix my issues.

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I wish the longterm consequences of that way of thinking will become clear to you. As you associate a decrease in psychological pain with an increase of physical pain, you'll spiral more and more into a self-destructive mode.

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I’m actually manic/depressive bi-polar, so that’s why I brought it up. I have a long history of bi-polar disorders in my family, most notably my grandfather.

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Manic/depressive bi-polar is more common than you can imagine. My best friend has this condition and he has related to me many of the same concerns you have.

He said that when he goes off his meds he falls into such a deep hole that he feels that he can't get out of it. He becomes paranoid and defensive with everyone, even me.

When he takes his meds, he is the most normal guy you could ever hope to know. Fortunately, he listens to feedback from his family and friends and has commited to maintaining his med regimen. We all love him and support him. As important, he loves us and supports us.

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What I am saying is that just like physical pain is the result of physical injury, psychological pain is the result of emotional injury. Emotional injury comes from hardships that must be overcome. Your mind recognizes something is wrong even if your active consciousness does not. The theory is that if I overcome what is making me sad, that psychological pain will fade. The danger, of course, is that I am merely projecting that pain onto issues I think I need to tackle despite that pain being completely divorced from real world issues. Thus meaning that I will find no relief from slaying those dragons, running the risk of never feeling satisfied and constantly torturing myself with unending quests.

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I hope you understand that your bi-polar condition is genetic and not the result of problems from your social environment. It's permanent and you must address it from that viewpoint.

If you'll face it head on with the help of a doctor and meds, you'll relegate it to its proper place in your life: Behind you, not in front of you.

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However, I feel like medication could put me on that exact same path.

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I promise you that medical technology has advanced to the point that you can live a perfectly normal psychological life. All it takes is a sincere commitment from you.

The truth is that I have had lots of highs and lows, but I did have a prolonged period of general contentness and happiness that was between bouts of deep depression. Those happy times lead me to believe I was happy for a reason then just like I’m unhappy for good reason now and prior to that happy period. And in hindsight, it’s really easy to see why I was/was not happy during those times. I guess I’m betting on my own abilities to address emotional deficits and correct self-destructive behaviors. If I’m wrong, I guess I’ll have to do some soul searching and go the medical route.

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One was a 38 year old pharmacist who was single and decent looking according to the ladies. Why does this information matter? Should people who arent decent looking kill themselves? Is that all there is to human beings?

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Should people who arent decent looking kill themselves? Is that all there is to human beings?

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I was just saying, he was a successful guy, always seemed happy, and was well liked by everyone. Women loved him. I understand depression can trump all that, but still hard to wrap my mind around. He didn’t really fit the profile I guess IMO IMHO FWIW.

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Talking to my old military buddies is my therapy

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I have a few. But my best friend was killed. And 2 more of the guys I spent almost 3 years doing contract work with ended themselves. So a lot of conversations with old teammates are about them, and it makes it worse for me. I have a strong sense of guilt and at times feel cursed. That’s what lead me to my new profession years ago. I figure helping people and trying to contribute to saving lives is my penance. But even that really gets me at times. I believe in God, strongly. And I believe paradise awaits on the other side. Sometimes I want to go so bad it hurts..... but I’m not sure I’ve even punched my ticket. That’s kind of what drives me. I try hard to do good and show kindness to everyone these days. And please believe I stay talking to Jesus. There’s still this sense of doubt though.

Sometimes depression can be caused by low levels of vitamin D. I used to get seasonal depression. Had a check up. Told my doctor. My vitamin D levels were really low. Started taking 10000 IU's of Vitamin D capsules every day. All better. Of course there are many forms of depression. This worked for me though.

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he was a successful guy, always seemed happy, and was well liked by everyone.

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These people are the most likely to commit suicide IMO. It's the fear of losing this and not being able to cope with it that bring on depression and anxiety.

Middle aged white dudes are the largest affected group.

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I just don’t understand how a species that was born for survival, can even consider it.

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I think that's a big part of it. The quest for survival has all but disappeared though the instinct is still there. People are socially geared for status which is a never ending cycle.

We idealize things, when we obtain them they are never as satisfying as they appeared. Deep inside we struggle with this as we repress the things that make us men. It's one reason soldiers coming back from combat have such a time adjusting to "normal" life.