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re: Crazy things you Dad used to say. For the OT guys and gals.
Posted on 7/22/15 at 8:32 pm to Uncle Willy
Posted on 7/22/15 at 8:32 pm to Uncle Willy
Once at a LSU game " son always remember you can build a 1000 bridges and suck one cock. You will always be known as a cocksucker and not a bridge builder"
This post was edited on 7/22/15 at 8:33 pm
0
Posted on 7/22/15 at 8:37 pm to BOSCEAUX
Me: Had a fight with my girlfriend
Dad: Did you hit her?
Me: No
Dad: Well, it wasn't a fight then.
Dad: Did you hit her?
Me: No
Dad: Well, it wasn't a fight then.
Posted on 7/22/15 at 8:45 pm to BOSCEAUX
"You so bright your momma calls you son!" after I'd done something stupid.
After a night where I came in a little late "Stayed out with the dry cows last night, huh"
When he thought I wasn't working hard enough "The more we do today, the less we'll have to do tomorrow" Tomorrow just never came along
To dads everywhere
After a night where I came in a little late "Stayed out with the dry cows last night, huh"
When he thought I wasn't working hard enough "The more we do today, the less we'll have to do tomorrow" Tomorrow just never came along
To dads everywhere
Posted on 7/22/15 at 8:54 pm to BOSCEAUX
"That store's prices are higher than giraffe balls."
When asked what he'd gotten for Father's day…"A piece of arse and a pair of socks and both were two sizes too big."
When asked what he'd gotten for Father's day…"A piece of arse and a pair of socks and both were two sizes too big."
This post was edited on 7/22/15 at 9:07 pm
Posted on 7/22/15 at 9:01 pm to Jenar Boy
"You're thicker than pig shite sometimes boy"
"Ain't but one thing better than pussy, that's more pussy"
"If I had a nickel for every time I told you how to do that, I could retire this week"
"You can't wish that log up there boy"
"Ain't but one thing better than pussy, that's more pussy"
"If I had a nickel for every time I told you how to do that, I could retire this week"
"You can't wish that log up there boy"
Posted on 7/22/15 at 9:14 pm to CaptainsWafer
quote:
Don't let your meat loaf.
Hey, whatever makes your meat loaf
Posted on 7/22/15 at 9:15 pm to BOSCEAUX
A hard head makes a soft arse
Posted on 7/22/15 at 9:17 pm to BOSCEAUX
I don't know whether to shite or go blind.
Son, that's worthless as a nickel on a bobcats arse.
Son, that's worthless as a nickel on a bobcats arse.
Posted on 7/22/15 at 9:28 pm to CharlesLSU
My old man used to look at me when I was about to challenge him in some way and ball up his two fists.
Then he'd look at me as he presented the left and say "Boy you want 6 months in the hospital"...then raising the right "or instant death!"
Or when he would look at Mom after I did something really stupid... "Remind me to slap that postman when I see him for giving us a dumbazz for a son"
Then he'd look at me as he presented the left and say "Boy you want 6 months in the hospital"...then raising the right "or instant death!"
Or when he would look at Mom after I did something really stupid... "Remind me to slap that postman when I see him for giving us a dumbazz for a son"
Posted on 7/22/15 at 9:58 pm to AUTimbo
"gotdammit boy...you couldn't drive a hard dick into a lard bucket."
My dad was the king of one line smartassery.
My dad was the king of one line smartassery.
Posted on 7/22/15 at 10:09 pm to BOSCEAUX
Here are some of my Daddy's best quotes:
The high road leads straight to the poor house.
I've seen better hair on salt pork (talking to balding people)
The sun don't shine on the same dog's arse all the time
A little man never sits well on a high horse
She's so ugly she'd make your doo hole pinch a hole in your car seat
There are only three kinds of women in the world - ones that can't cook, ones that can cook and ones that look good while they're cooking
He's as useless as tits on a bull
The high road leads straight to the poor house.
I've seen better hair on salt pork (talking to balding people)
The sun don't shine on the same dog's arse all the time
A little man never sits well on a high horse
She's so ugly she'd make your doo hole pinch a hole in your car seat
There are only three kinds of women in the world - ones that can't cook, ones that can cook and ones that look good while they're cooking
He's as useless as tits on a bull
This post was edited on 7/22/15 at 10:19 pm
Posted on 7/22/15 at 10:15 pm to HaveMercy
Anytime I was going out for the night in high school he would always stop me at the door and say "remember who you are and whose you are." I never understood the meaning of those words until I got older.
Posted on 7/22/15 at 10:17 pm to beebefootballfan
quote:
remember who you are and whose you are."
Yep, my dad was big on the you don't just represent yourself but the people that raised you.
Posted on 7/22/15 at 10:22 pm to HaveMercy
A few from mine that I can recall;
When asking if something was right,
Does a frog have a water tight a-hole?
Does a wild bear shite in the woods?
When complaining about something;
You know what they call that in Russia? Tough shitska!
And one that has been posted I thing; shite in one hand and want in the other, see which fill first.
See this hand? POP! Should have been watching the other.
Probably mentioned more than once about the best part of me running down my mothers leg.
And my favorite, frick em all son. Don't get hung up on one.
Gotta love dad!
When asking if something was right,
Does a frog have a water tight a-hole?
Does a wild bear shite in the woods?
When complaining about something;
You know what they call that in Russia? Tough shitska!
And one that has been posted I thing; shite in one hand and want in the other, see which fill first.
See this hand? POP! Should have been watching the other.
Probably mentioned more than once about the best part of me running down my mothers leg.
And my favorite, frick em all son. Don't get hung up on one.
Gotta love dad!
Posted on 7/22/15 at 10:24 pm to BOSCEAUX
"It's rainin' like a cow pissin' on a flat rock"
Posted on 7/22/15 at 10:27 pm to JazzyJeff
This was one of my best friends dad favorite saying when we would frick something.
"Boy say one more thing and I'm gonna be all up in ya eyes like onions"!
"Boy say one more thing and I'm gonna be all up in ya eyes like onions"!
Posted on 7/22/15 at 11:29 pm to BOSCEAUX
Those were some good ones, several of which I've never heard. to you and your passed father
to you and your passed father Posted on 7/22/15 at 11:55 pm to YogaPants
Posted on 7/22/15 at 11:56 pm to BOSCEAUX
He couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the heel.
Something tasty is "Larrapin"
Shut up, I can't see!
Something tasty is "Larrapin"
Shut up, I can't see!
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