re: Complicated marriage/legal question involving finances

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my wife

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I know I’m coming to the correct place- Ok- this has been a really rough 2024 for our family - basically, I’m pretty confident my wife is going through a mental health crisis but she is refusing therapy. I know Baker Act is an option but i feel it’s a last ditch effort- and honestly, it’s effn hard and complicated and unless you have faced it- you wouldn’t know- Ok, moving to my questions- since May 1, my wife has moved about $3k to her visa bank card and $1600 in ATM withdrawals Now, currently we are a single income family (me) - she doesn’t have a job. She has been withdrawing money starting about 10days ago…$200 here …$300 there etc (the $200 seems to be from convenience stores and truck stops) …on Tuesday of this week, after she pulled $300 ($1000 to that point) i asked why is this happening- she says, paying bills (she has been the bill payer). I didnt necessarily believe her but since our marriage has been strained (bc of new odd behaviors including this one) i let it slide but then the next day (Wednesday) she pulled more ($1200 to date). I then sent a text saying…stop pulling money out until we can sit down and discuss. She accused me of being controlling etc but honestly, i don’t care- i just want to know the truth. On Thursday, i decided to open up a separate account and once i got my early direct deposit on Friday, i quickly transferred to my new account (same bank for ease of transfers) She protested etc said it might not be legal etc blah blah - i told her that we will sit down and discuss finances and figure all this out - once we go to therapy (again, emotions are really high) Also, in context- most of this month she has been hotel living bc she says she feels unsafe around me etc - so I’m confident that most of the credit card money is hotel rooms Anyway, i just checked our mutual bank account and she has withdrawn another $400 (total of $1600) So i went ahead and transferred pretty much everything else to my new bank account until we talk about all of this

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Ok, and maybe it’s denial but this past month, I’ve been ALL over our phone bill and there isn’t a new number or a person she is in contact with that i don’t know-

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Homeboy thinks all drug transactions are done via texts/calls.



Social media, Snapchat, kik, WhatsApp, etc.

JR had Sue Ellen put in a Sanitarium for much less.

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I can’t imagine her rolling up to a trap house etc- it’s just not her lol

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She has done all the new behaviour you have described but she won’t buy street drugs? Because that’s just not her? And that’s funny?

I’ve lived this. Open your damned eyes. She will ruin the lives of your family.

Hopefully not in your case but a couple hundred dollar withdrawal every day or every other day lots of times equals drugs. Get her some help man

The reason you use cash is because you don't want a trail on what you're spending the money on. The fact you're telling her to stop, opening up a separate account and she continues to pull money out is telling you something. She's up to something she doesn't want you to know about. If she's not willing to clear the air she's going the Bill Clinton route of deny deny deny. It's up to you if you're gonna allow it to continue. She's not working. It's your money she's spending and she's not willing to tell you what's she's spending it on. No one pays bills via cash and certainly with no receipts.

sounds like she is preparing to leave you and building a nest egg.

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There’s a lot going on here, but I strongly recommend getting detailed credit checks for yourself and her. And pay for a legitimate credit monitoring service. You can even lock your credit from allowing any new loans.

It’s possible she could open credit cards/loans in your name if you cut off the cash access.

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This

I rarely say to run to an attorney, but run to an attorney. Do not pass go, call in for tomorrow morning and be waiting to get to an office asap tomorrow.

She is crazy, she is probably unfaithful, or at the very least has a drug habit, and she will be a complete nut case after yall split. This is hard to manage with out competent advice.