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re: Anyone have a kid that just doesn’t care about school?
Posted on 1/30/23 at 4:11 pm to EZE Tiger Fan
Posted on 1/30/23 at 4:11 pm to EZE Tiger Fan
quote:
GOT A JOB.
I feel like the biggest thing that changed the way I approached life was making my own money, and relying less and less on my parents, until I didn't rely on them at all. It was such a motivating and liberating factor once I got off the tit, and didn't look back. Was the catalyst in getting my shite together.
0
Posted on 1/30/23 at 5:19 pm to Prominentwon
I was a C student all through elementary and middle school, then made straight A's and had AP classes and a 4.0 in high school, great ACT and SAT scores. Nothing in particular changed, I guess my mind and priorities matured at some point.
Hell, my wife was a drop-out, but got her shite together later in life and is now a doctor (the kind that performs surgery and can write prescriptions for controlled substances and actually has her own DEA license).
4th grade is a little young to diagnose the rest of his life.
Hell, my wife was a drop-out, but got her shite together later in life and is now a doctor (the kind that performs surgery and can write prescriptions for controlled substances and actually has her own DEA license).
4th grade is a little young to diagnose the rest of his life.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 5:30 pm to deeprig9
quote:
I guess my mind and priorities matured at some point.
Some get that drive later than others, doesn't hurt them a bit.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 5:45 pm to Prominentwon
quote:
He’s 10 in the 4th grade.
10 is mighty young to apply to medical school or get in the C suite of a Fortune 500 company.
There is still time.
When he figures out that his bank account makes him handsome, he will put in the work.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 5:51 pm to Scruffy
School was like a form of prison for me. Your kid may be a free-thinker. Sometimes the ones that can't be told what to do all the time like little robots end up creators/builders/achievers as adults. There is definitely life outside of the college pipeline. I wouldn't worry too much about it.
I dropped out of high school (last grade I passed was 9th) and if my federal tax bill was my income it would put me in the top 1% in Tennessee.
I dropped out of high school (last grade I passed was 9th) and if my federal tax bill was my income it would put me in the top 1% in Tennessee.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 5:57 pm to Prominentwon
quote:
He’s 10 in the 4th grade.
I did not win the Nobel prize at 10.
I did not ever win it.
10 is mighty young to apply to medical school or get in the C suite of a Fortune 500 company.
There is still time. He can join the marines at 16 with your consent.
When he figures out that his bank account makes him handsome, he will put in the work.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 5:58 pm to SlowFlowPro
quote:
Gifted is mostly IQ (and would explain lots of the issues you're discussing). If you don't challenge gifted kids correctly they don't care.
This has carried over in to my career. Not a good thing. Hopefully I'll grow up soon.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 6:07 pm to wileyjones
quote:
avoid adderall at all costs imo, speaking from similar experience
I agree, unless he is diagnosed with ADHD. The description sounds like my whole school career from 1st grade through college. My oldest son (no pics; trying to be fair to the L-O-L-A Lola’s) was behaving exactly as described. I asked my doctor to test me for adult ADHD so I could evaluate any psychotic effects of medication. I have been on adderall for about 10 years (don’t take it as often as prescribed) and have had no adverse effects.
If he has ADHD at 5 years old he will have it at 55. It isn’t a “phase.” Get professional advice from somewhere other than the OT.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 6:22 pm to Festus
quote:What kind of parent would allow this?
I watched a brilliant kid just not give a shite, and lay in bed not going to school
Posted on 1/30/23 at 6:31 pm to Prominentwon
Is it learning he doesn't like or the structure of 'school'? These are two very different things and I suspect his issue is the latter.
I struggled with the overly disciplinarian and authoritative nature of grade school, getting herded around by bells like cattle, having to ask permission to take a piss, the busy work etc etc.
Average in grade school. Got to college, found my calling and never looked back, bachelors masters and PhD later.
Find what he likes and ignite that passion. Itll help him through the grade school monotony.
I struggled with the overly disciplinarian and authoritative nature of grade school, getting herded around by bells like cattle, having to ask permission to take a piss, the busy work etc etc.
Average in grade school. Got to college, found my calling and never looked back, bachelors masters and PhD later.
Find what he likes and ignite that passion. Itll help him through the grade school monotony.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 6:47 pm to Prominentwon
Similar situation here. 13 yo/7th grader. Thought it was ADD. He wouldn’t pay attention in class, constantly got in trouble for talking in class. Put him on meds. Didn’t work. Took him off the meds. Made average grades.
Kid was accepted into Duke TIP in the 4 and 5 grades so it’s not an intelligence thing. I just think school today sucks.
I mean when I went to school, pre high school, the homework was minimal. I had plenty of time for sports and still did well I. School. Now these fricking teachers suck. They assign so much homework I truly believe that some kids just tune out after awhile. My son goes to school from 8-3, and has swim practice, which is brutal, for an hour and a half everyday. Then he has 3-3.5 hours of homework. And most of it is stupid busy work.
We have had to monitor his studying so we make sure it gets done, but sometimes the kid just looks exhausted. Throw in puberty/hormones and you have a recipe for apathy.
Kid was accepted into Duke TIP in the 4 and 5 grades so it’s not an intelligence thing. I just think school today sucks.
I mean when I went to school, pre high school, the homework was minimal. I had plenty of time for sports and still did well I. School. Now these fricking teachers suck. They assign so much homework I truly believe that some kids just tune out after awhile. My son goes to school from 8-3, and has swim practice, which is brutal, for an hour and a half everyday. Then he has 3-3.5 hours of homework. And most of it is stupid busy work.
We have had to monitor his studying so we make sure it gets done, but sometimes the kid just looks exhausted. Throw in puberty/hormones and you have a recipe for apathy.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 7:20 pm to Prominentwon
My 14 yo is the same. Not too worried with school Just wants to pass. Everyone says he is super respectful. I guess we should be really happy about that aspect. Works his arse off in the weight room. Coaches love him. We’ve even considered taking that outlet away but I don’t think it will affect him much.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 7:30 pm to Prominentwon
My youngest son was like this. Scored 90% or better on the standardized tests. Didn’t like school. Just started doing line crew work. College isn’t for everyone. Steer him toward vo-tech. What does he like to do?
Posted on 1/30/23 at 7:32 pm to tigergirl10
quote:
What kind of parent would allow this?
Many. A lot of today's parents are either trying to be their kids' best friend, are scared of their kid, or don't have the time or energy to care.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 8:59 pm to Prominentwon
quote:
Anyone have a kid that just doesn’t care about school?
Yep, about 117 of them every day.
That's okay though, as long as the rest of us keep working, the government will give them what they need to survive.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 9:01 pm to Prominentwon
Had to throw in the brilliant part. Most people think their kids are brilliant, but they’re not.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 9:02 pm to olgoi khorkhoi
quote:
School was like a form of prison for me. Your kid may be a free-thinker. Sometimes the ones that can't be told what to do all the time like little robots end up creators/builders/achievers as adults.
I'm with you. I grew up reading encyclopedias, I loved to learn but school structure was too strict for me. I did much better in college.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 9:09 pm to Festus
quote:
Goldrush, when did you do this, what age? And why? Did you choose to move out, or forced?
I moved out at 22, parents didn't force me. I just felt compelled to move out and experience life on my own. I wanted to do housework (or not do it) as I pleased, watch TV and play video games as much as I wanted without being bugged, have friends over as much as I wanted, and I got to do all of that. What also came with it was months of eating hamburger helper, running out of gas on the I-10 near Laplace and having the electricity in my apartment shut off, which kinda made me get my priorities in order.
I guess I should mention a huge detail, I ended up in the Army shortly after that 6-month stint on my own which was the best decision of my life. I know OP may not want his son to go to the military but it straightened me up and really set the table for the rest of my life.
This post was edited on 1/30/23 at 9:15 pm
Posted on 1/30/23 at 9:09 pm to Prominentwon
Had two like that. Both are now well adjusted adults.
Posted on 1/30/23 at 9:10 pm to Prominentwon
Show him the tread of the gu with the homeless next door, tell him if he blows off school and ends up poor, that will be his life.
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