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Started By
Message
re: Adults Whose Parents "Make" Them Do Things
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:42 am to Mingo Was His NameO
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:42 am to Mingo Was His NameO
quote:
Family is more important. If that extra percentage of your expenses effects the affordability of this trip for you, you don't need to be going anyway. If this were my friend I would completely understand why they couldn't come.
He has zero emotional connection to the deceased. It has nothing to do with affordability, it's just the principle of sticking to your commitments.
quote:
Yet, you are the only one bitching about it on the internet and maybe your friends are selfish too, I don't know.
Weak retort. They aren't happy either, but whatever.
1
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:44 am to facher08
He never wanted to go on the trip with you and used his mom friends funereal or whatever as an excuse...it’s you
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:44 am to LNCHBOX
quote:Fisrt off Lnchbox thinks he knows everything. 2nd, respect goes both way, but the continual pressure of control most boomer parents push on their kids is not respect.
quote:
That is ridiculous. I'm very close with my family and they'd never "make" me do anything. It's called respect.
That respect goes both ways, which is why OP's friend is doing something his mother asks of him.
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:45 am to facher08
quote:
So what? He was on the hook for booking and paying for certain things and pulls this last minute
I guess you'll have to buy the drugs now
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:45 am to CarRamrod
quote:
Fisrt off Lnchbox thinks he knows everything
quote:
CarRamrod
Well call me kettle then.
quote:
2nd, respect goes both way, but the continual pressure of control most boomer parents push on their kids is not respect.
Says the guy that has no clue about this person's family dynamics.
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:46 am to LNCHBOX
quote:
Didn't sound like she was asking. At least I don't think that's what "make" means.
You're basing that off Op's description, which is likely leaving stuff out.
I'm not. Make is in quotes because she isn't forcefully making him do anything thing, but she expects him to abide by her wishes.
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:48 am to Hawgnsincebirth55
quote:must bee a leaux bar their
when I graduate and I am counting the days until I don't have to put up with there crap
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:48 am to LNCHBOX
quote:i dont think i know everything.
Well call me kettle then.
quote:never said i did, My comment was a continuation of my previous post. There is a trend that boomer parents do this. If you dont believe it, you arent very observant.
Says the guy that has no clue about this person's family dynamics.
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:49 am to facher08
Nobody makes me do anything
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:50 am to CarRamrod
quote:
i dont think i know everything.
Sure. Neither do I then.
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:51 am to facher08
Do you have kids? This is one reason.
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:52 am to Brageous
quote:
Do you have kids? This is one reason.
None of us do.
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:52 am to facher08
quote:
He has zero emotional connection to the deceased
Just his family, but fricke'em your vacation is more important.
If it were me, I'd offer to pay part of the trip since I committed and had to back out, thats your okly gripe, but him backing out because someone died is not wrong.
quote:
Weak retort. They aren't happy either, but whatever.
So they're selfish too, got it.
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:54 am to Hawgnsincebirth55
quote:
I'm 21 and still live at home. Will be moving out in May when I graduate and I am counting the days until I don't have to put up with there crap
You're 21 living for free. You have to put up with it.
Posted on 4/11/18 at 10:55 am to airfernando
quote:
airfernando
Why did you bolden graduate?
Posted on 4/11/18 at 11:05 am to facher08
Going to a funeral of your parents friends or distant relatives is a wonderful display of respect and compassion for the bereaved- provided all involved aren’t assholes who can’t stand each other. It’s one of those “ little things” that can bring meaning to your life and the lives of others. If you don’t care about any of that, I get it. Some do, some don’t.
Posted on 4/11/18 at 11:07 am to LSUBoo
quote:or sending that in a quick text
There's nothing wrong with being close to your parents and still saying, "can't make the funeral, already have plans, sorry, send my regards."
Posted on 4/11/18 at 11:11 am to Mingo Was His NameO
quote:
If it were me, I'd offer to pay part of the trip since I committed and had to back out, thats your okly gripe
Yea, no shite.
quote:
but him backing out because someone died is not wrong.
Someone dieing is irrelevant. He did not know the person. Say his mom really wanted him to be home for a bbq she was throwing. Doesn't matter.
quote:
So they're selfish too, got it.
So mom's eishes always come first. Context and situation doesn't matter. Got it.
Posted on 4/11/18 at 11:12 am to facher08
quote:
So mom's eishes always come first
Before friends regarding a vacation? Yes.
Posted on 4/11/18 at 11:16 am to facher08
quote:
Someone dieing is irrelevant. He did not know the person. Say his mom really wanted him to be home for a bbq she was throwing. Doesn't matter.
But he does know his mom. The funeral isn’t about the deceased, it’s about those who are mourning. If his mom wants him to be there for emotional support or any reason and he decides to go, that is valid. Be pissed about it if you want but your buddy isn’t in the wrong here.
This post was edited on 4/11/18 at 11:18 am
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