re: Why do people on this board act like humans are the weakest creatures on earth?

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My money is on the guy who can damn near deadlift a Volkswagen

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You don't have any money. People with money get good educations and learn things.

Stupid and poor. What a combination.

I've watched many videos on chimp attacks. Most of them are done to women and children. It can be viscous but every chimp attack doesnt end up that way and if a 10 year old child gets fricked up but us still able to survive I'm sure one of the largest humans on earth going in with gmtge intent to kill the chimp could hold his own

Well the chimp might take the bat but I don't see them using it effectively lol it would probably just discard it SO you could regain it with a little maneuvering . I think a roided out power lifting type, 6-5 350 with the metal bat is dead even maybe even a little favored over an average (130ish lb) chimp. The metal bat with that kind of strength is a complete equalizer. Man I love this thread lol. By the way if PETA finds out about this thread we are all in trouble.

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unless you believe a chimp has a super human chin and kicks to the face just dont affect them

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Considering that they are NOT HUMAN, saying super human still doesn't fathom their capabilities. You are constantly looking at this through a very ignorant human eye and from your perspective. Im assuming you dont hunt or have never killed anything. If so, and being in nature and around animals, you'd have alot more respect for their strength and toughness. The ONLY REASON WE ARE THE DOMINANT SPECIES on the planet is because of our intellect and our ability to solve problems and use tools at an extremely efficient manner. A human versus a mature Whitetail buck without any tools (OK, I'll give you your shitty UFC gloves since you seem to be so infatuated with MMA fighters) would get destroyed as well, and I be a hell of alot more terrified to have to fight a chimp vs fighting a Whitetail deer. Animals do not think the way humans do. They have no mercy. They have no regard. Think about a scenario we've probably all experienced, a small house cat sitting in your lap and it starts growling like it doesnt want to be touched while youre petting it. All of sudden, it loses it's shite (or just reacts like an animal does when it gives off warning signs and you dont listen) and it paws and scratches at you and literally contorts it's entire body in a fit of rage to escape your grasp and get away. You will ABSOLUTELY let go of that fricking cat despite being 20x times its size, strength, intelligence, etc. Now convert that scenario to being in a cage with something that has no regard for life, is 4x stronger than you, has 1" fangs, it has 4 limbs that are all stronger and more adaptable to grabbing and holding things than your two limbs are, can leap higher and further than any human being can, has much denser bone structure, has vastly different muscle tissue that is superior to ours when it comes to strength, etc. And you seriously think because of an MMA's fighter's skill he'll be able to time up a defensive leg kick and daze this animal? No, what would happen is your femur would snap over chimps skull or you'd have two extremely large puncture marks from those fangs, or your leg would be instinctually blocked and grabbed by something that has far greater reach then you. Then what do you do? Attempt to sprawl away? That isn't happening. Try to fricking jab it in the face? You will never get enough leverage on it to attempt a head throw. Are you gonna put a fricking animal that is so much stronger and explosive than a human in a fricking arm bar? Even though it's not even physically possible, the chimp would never even allow you to. You gonna mount it from behind and rear naked choke it? Imagine what would happen in a real MMA fight if a human was being choked and instead of tapping (which is the code of ethics within a sanctioned and proper fight), the human would rotate it's face slighty and bite the frick out of the forearm of the choker. You think the choker is going to hold on or let go? Now imagine that is a chimp that just took a 5" section out of your arm. You think the choker is going to hold on or let go? Let's talk from a clinch. One really solid knee strike to the rib cage from a human can break multiple ribs. What happens when a chimp clinches you with so much force that you cant escape because it's vastly superior to any human ever in strength, then it elevates it's lower half and double kicks you to the ribs or sternum. It would shatter the entire bone structure on one half of your body. That's only assuming, which would be the wrong assumption, that a chimp wouldnt just take a giant bite out of your face since it's conveniently in the area of it's mouth within a clinch. We can go on and on but it's youre either not a very intelligent person, are incredibly ignorant and have no respect for animals, or have been trolling this entire time.

I've killed many animals actually. I e hunted my entire life. I've had to put down wounded deer and some pretty unique ways. I've had to put down dogs, and kill ducks and geese that weren't dead initially. A buck I shot got up and ran about 15 yards and fell down one time. I walked over to it and it did it again. So the next time when I got close i jumped on it, held it down and slit its throat. Obviously this jsnt the same thing but animals dont magically have the ability to get away from a human who is sprawling on them. Onbuosuly you've never let loose on something. I had a cat do that to me once, the exact scenario your talking about, it scratched the hell out of my arm and kneecap and my reaction was sadly to grab it by the throat and I ended up killing the cat. You people are all looking at this as if he would be holding back in the fight people do against other humans. That's not how this would be

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I would mess a baby gorilla up, baw...

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I'd teach it sign language, then enter it in a spelling bee against Hawgsincebirth and bet heavily on the gorilla.

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Onbuosuly you've never let loose on something. I had a cat do that to me once, the exact scenario your talking about, it scratched the hell out of my arm and kneecap and my reaction was sadly to grab it by the throat and I ended up killing the cat.

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Wait, you murdered a house cat because it scratched your knee?

Honestly, I'm sort of thinking you deserve a cage match with a chimp now.

Even a small monkey would frick up most humans. You fricking with the wrong species here