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March is the time to celebrate Dad Jokes
Posted on 3/20/17 at 4:51 pm
Posted on 3/20/17 at 4:51 pm
It's March Dadness
22
Posted on 3/20/17 at 4:52 pm to thedogman
Uh, you gonna tell a joke ?
Posted on 3/20/17 at 4:52 pm to thedogman
trying to hard 
Posted on 3/20/17 at 4:52 pm to thedogman
What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu?
You fix on with a tweetment and the other with and oinkment
You fix on with a tweetment and the other with and oinkment
Posted on 3/20/17 at 4:57 pm to thedogman
Roses are Red
Violets are Blue
I fricked your dad last night
Violets are Blue
I fricked your dad last night
Posted on 3/20/17 at 4:58 pm to thedogman
How do you make a kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it.
Posted on 3/20/17 at 5:15 pm to thedogman
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
Its ok he woke up.
Its ok he woke up.
Posted on 3/20/17 at 5:28 pm to thedogman
I told my friend I liked Beyonce.
He said: Whatever floats your boat.
I said: No, that's buoyancy.
He said: Whatever floats your boat.
I said: No, that's buoyancy.
Posted on 3/20/17 at 5:37 pm to thedogman
You know how many dead people are in that cemetery?
All of them.
I kid you not, that is one my dad said multiple times
All of them.
I kid you not, that is one my dad said multiple times
Posted on 3/20/17 at 5:57 pm to thedogman
A man walks into a bar... stays there my entire childhood
Posted on 3/20/17 at 6:11 pm to thedogman
This is fricking stupid.
Anyone know the most confusing day in the hood?
Anyone know the most confusing day in the hood?
Posted on 3/20/17 at 6:15 pm to thedogman
You know how much it cost to get into Bucaneer state park (on I10 near La/Ms border)?
2 dollars. A buck an ear
2 dollars. A buck an ear
Posted on 3/20/17 at 6:24 pm to thedogman
I was walking with my fiancée yesterday past a Saab car parked on the side of the road. I pointed at it and said "I have a story about that car. It's a real sob story."
She laughed.
We then approached a Chevy Trailblazer. I pointed at it and said, "that car was one of the first of its kind, a true trail blazer." She sorta laughed and told me to stop it.
We then approached a Dodge Ram. I pointed at it as said, "this car has an onboard computer, has a ton of RAM." She was legitimately upset and demanded I stop.
She laughed.
We then approached a Chevy Trailblazer. I pointed at it and said, "that car was one of the first of its kind, a true trail blazer." She sorta laughed and told me to stop it.
We then approached a Dodge Ram. I pointed at it as said, "this car has an onboard computer, has a ton of RAM." She was legitimately upset and demanded I stop.
Posted on 3/20/17 at 6:32 pm to thedogman
Did you hear that police arrested a guy who couldn't spell?
They caught him in a warehouse.
What's the bad thing about watching a soccer match in Warsaw?
No matter where you sit, you're always sitting behind a Pole.
They caught him in a warehouse.
What's the bad thing about watching a soccer match in Warsaw?
No matter where you sit, you're always sitting behind a Pole.
Posted on 3/20/17 at 8:15 pm to thedogman
Did you hear about the guy who swam halfway across the lake then got tired so he turned around and swam back - My Dad
Posted on 3/21/17 at 8:34 am to thedogman
Two guys walked into a bar...the third guy ducked.
Posted on 3/21/17 at 9:03 am to thedogman
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?
A stick.
A stick.
Posted on 3/21/17 at 9:11 am to thedogman
Every time we pass train tracks...
Train must've just passed... How do you know dad...?
You can still see the tracks....
Train must've just passed... How do you know dad...?
You can still see the tracks....
Posted on 3/21/17 at 9:17 am to thedogman
I actually told the greatest dad joke of my life the other day.
Woman was wearing green socks on St. Paddys day that said "Pinch Me".
I tell her, "that doesnt make any sense. You get pinched if you ARENT wearing green. Those socks are a contradiction. In fact you could say that pair of socks...is a paradox."
Then i just looked around at the distain and beautiful non-laughter and gave the ole 'Haahhh? ehhh??? ammirite?"
God damn it got me excited for the whole fricking day. Beautiful.
Woman was wearing green socks on St. Paddys day that said "Pinch Me".
I tell her, "that doesnt make any sense. You get pinched if you ARENT wearing green. Those socks are a contradiction. In fact you could say that pair of socks...is a paradox."
Then i just looked around at the distain and beautiful non-laughter and gave the ole 'Haahhh? ehhh??? ammirite?"
God damn it got me excited for the whole fricking day. Beautiful.
This post was edited on 3/21/17 at 9:18 am
Posted on 3/21/17 at 9:18 am to thedogman
My wife misses me, but her aim is getting better
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