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What were some funny things your high school coach did/said?
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:29 am
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:29 am
Here are just a few from my coach:
"Boy you can't fool me, I can tell a catfish from a gar in six feet of muddy water!"
"You need to tie kerosene rags around your ankles so the ants don't crawl up your legs and bite your candy arse!"
"I don't know how y'all drink beer, yall are too damn weak to pick the can up to your lips"
One time he made a player write a letter to the school we played the week before explaining that he actually was a football player.
He also taped the quarterback's hands together because he kept fumbling the snap.
"Boy you can't fool me, I can tell a catfish from a gar in six feet of muddy water!"
"You need to tie kerosene rags around your ankles so the ants don't crawl up your legs and bite your candy arse!"
"I don't know how y'all drink beer, yall are too damn weak to pick the can up to your lips"
One time he made a player write a letter to the school we played the week before explaining that he actually was a football player.
He also taped the quarterback's hands together because he kept fumbling the snap.
This post was edited on 8/12/15 at 1:05 pm
97
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:31 am to PawnMaster
"Let me help you take off your jockstrap"
Ahhh goodtimes
Ahhh goodtimes
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:31 am to PawnMaster
This your coach?
LINK
LINK
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:32 am to PawnMaster
Gonna be a whole lot of Uncle Rico's in this thread.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:32 am to PawnMaster
It just wasn't in the cards today, guys.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:32 am to PawnMaster
"Ok guys, they're either gonna throw the ball or pass the ball!"-Coach Garidel CHS football
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:33 am to LNCHBOX
After our first full practice of the season, coach was talking to us and said "guys we're small but we're slow"
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:33 am to PawnMaster
I remember a lot of "horseshite" flying around practice.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:33 am to PawnMaster
"You could frick up a wet dream"
Good times.
Good times.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:35 am to PawnMaster
In junior high a coach told us the Lone Ranger and Tonto joke with the punchline along the lines of "I said go get the posse not the pussy".
That was a big deal in 7th grade.
That was a big deal in 7th grade.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:35 am to PawnMaster
"This ain't no Mickey Mouse operation"--baseball coach
"If I had a knife right now I would slice your throat"--basketball coach.
Good times.
"If I had a knife right now I would slice your throat"--basketball coach.
Good times.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:36 am to PawnMaster
What's the danger of a hot crack pipe son?
It burns the lips.
It burns the lips.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:37 am to PawnMaster
We always took team pictures during August practice. The day before, our coach would make the announcement that pictures were tomorrow, and then he would say, if any of you are thinking about quitting, go ahead and do it now so we don't have to take your picture out of the program.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:37 am to LasVegasTiger
It was a total laugh riot when he banged the girl I had a crush on. :(
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:39 am to PawnMaster
Made us move to the other end of the field because there was a funnel cloud forming near the end we were on.
Made a freshman chase down an ice cream truck and buy him something.
Made a freshman chase down an ice cream truck and buy him something.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:39 am to PawnMaster
My junior high coach was old and tough as nails. He didn't believe in water breaks. One summer during 2 a days one of our linemen fell out and laying on the ground. Coach said "hey what the hell is wrong with you ". Kid said "i need water. I cant swallow ". Coach said "why the hell do you need to swallow it ain't prom night". Ah good times.
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:40 am to PawnMaster
Ya chicken housing
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:41 am to PawnMaster
After running the 40 for times, coach told me "You are so slow I can clock you with a sun dial".
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:41 am to PawnMaster
When the players lined up and pretty all the white guys lined up together and all the black guys lined up together...
"What is this bullshite? I wasn't aware that we have a black team and a white team! We only have one team. I better see a line full of oreos pronto!"
"What is this bullshite? I wasn't aware that we have a black team and a white team! We only have one team. I better see a line full of oreos pronto!"
Posted on 8/12/15 at 9:43 am to PawnMaster
We had 3 black players on our team. He would turn to the DC and say "send in the black power squad".
In practice, my position coach would say, "Max...are you feeling sick??? Did your girlfriend break up with you??? Then catch the G-D football".
The HC, when describing the sock options we had with our uniforms, would say, "you can wear whole meat, half meat, or no meat at all" (describing how much calf would show over top of the sock)
In practice, my position coach would say, "Max...are you feeling sick??? Did your girlfriend break up with you??? Then catch the G-D football".
The HC, when describing the sock options we had with our uniforms, would say, "you can wear whole meat, half meat, or no meat at all" (describing how much calf would show over top of the sock)
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