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re: Interesting topic for OT parents... Sleepovers
Posted on 3/4/15 at 11:48 am to msflower
Posted on 3/4/15 at 11:48 am to msflower
yes
8 years old, don't know the kid or the parents, live in sketchy neighborhood
reasonable to not have a sleepover IMO
maybe invite the parents over to get to know them better if you think your kid is going to be friends with this kid for awhile?
8 years old, don't know the kid or the parents, live in sketchy neighborhood
reasonable to not have a sleepover IMO
maybe invite the parents over to get to know them better if you think your kid is going to be friends with this kid for awhile?
This post was edited on 3/4/15 at 11:49 am
Posted on 3/4/15 at 11:52 am to msflower
Take sexual abuse out of the equation....
And I think we can all mostly agree on this-
Obviously, you never under any circumstances let your kid spend the night at a known sex offender or drug users house....
You can't and shouldn't forever shelter you kids from all pain and assholes. But each parent has to make that decision for themselves regarding at which point they want their kid to learn those particular lessons. In my opinion, if they aren't yet taught how to respectfully stand up for themselves, they're not ready.
And I think we can all mostly agree on this-
Obviously, you never under any circumstances let your kid spend the night at a known sex offender or drug users house....
You can't and shouldn't forever shelter you kids from all pain and assholes. But each parent has to make that decision for themselves regarding at which point they want their kid to learn those particular lessons. In my opinion, if they aren't yet taught how to respectfully stand up for themselves, they're not ready.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 11:52 am to Salmon
You know what I'm saying.
People take segments of topic that's not even the point and run with it.
I don't get the need that some have to do that.
People take segments of topic that's not even the point and run with it.
I don't get the need that some have to do that.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 11:58 am to TIGRLEE
I disagree actually.
There was a great piece that touched on this matter somewhat on an NPR podcast. When our generation was young, we would play out in the woods, unsupervised, we could ride our bikes around the neighborhood without cell phones, and as long as we were home for dinner, our parents didn't mind. However, there has been a huge shift in how children are raised. They spend less time over at friends' houses, playing outside, and not being glued to the phone. I'm not against cell phones for children, it's a good security feature to have, but somewhere along the line we decided that society is more dangerous nowadays. Unless you live in a large city like Chicago or SF, I don't think suburbia has become any more dangerous.
If I had children, I would allow sleepovers. My parents didn't allow sleepovers until we were 12. I think that's a fine age to allow them in elementary school if you have a good relationship with the other children's' parents.
There was a great piece that touched on this matter somewhat on an NPR podcast. When our generation was young, we would play out in the woods, unsupervised, we could ride our bikes around the neighborhood without cell phones, and as long as we were home for dinner, our parents didn't mind. However, there has been a huge shift in how children are raised. They spend less time over at friends' houses, playing outside, and not being glued to the phone. I'm not against cell phones for children, it's a good security feature to have, but somewhere along the line we decided that society is more dangerous nowadays. Unless you live in a large city like Chicago or SF, I don't think suburbia has become any more dangerous.
If I had children, I would allow sleepovers. My parents didn't allow sleepovers until we were 12. I think that's a fine age to allow them in elementary school if you have a good relationship with the other children's' parents.
This post was edited on 3/4/15 at 12:01 pm
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:01 pm to JonaYolles
My kids won't be getting cell phones till they are driving. And I don't even like that but I understand it's the world we live in. I hate cell phones. They make people stupid. This generations critical thinking and problem solving skills are shite because of them.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:02 pm to TIGRLEE
It's different when they're attacking a flawed premise.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:03 pm to GeauxxxTigers23
I'm not talking super advanced smartphones for 10 year olds. I'm talking a super basic walmart phone with a pay as you go plan so you can call the kids to check up on them if needed.
I have a co-worker who has given both of his little girls smart phones (think they are 10 and 12), and he tracks them! He uses it to know exactly where they are at all times. I find it a bit creepy tbh.
I have a co-worker who has given both of his little girls smart phones (think they are 10 and 12), and he tracks them! He uses it to know exactly where they are at all times. I find it a bit creepy tbh.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:03 pm to TIGRLEE
quote:
For the 23rd time what does it matter?
Why do care if it's safer today than it was 20 years ago?
So typical of this board... There's always a select fee that will take a portion of atopic that's for the most part inconsequential to the discussion and try to make it about that.
Ok y'all win.
It's safer in 2015 that it was in 1990.
All the worries and concerns for the well being of my/our kids can all go away.
Ya!
Because the article explicitly based it's ridiculous prescriptions on the opposite assertion?
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:03 pm to JonaYolles
quote:
I have a co-worker who has given both of his little girls smart phones (think they are 10 and 12), and he tracks them! He uses it to know exactly where they are at all times. I find it a bit creepy tbh.
Doing more harm than good IMO
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:03 pm to Big Scrub TX
Not really at all.
Are purposely trying to miss the point?
Are purposely trying to miss the point?
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:03 pm to TIGRLEE
I think its silly.
I'm not going to let my kids just go sleepover at just any random persons house but I'm also not going to prevent them from enjoying normal childhood activities.
I disagree with the whole premise of the article for reasons already mentioned earlier in the thread.
I'm not going to let my kids just go sleepover at just any random persons house but I'm also not going to prevent them from enjoying normal childhood activities.
I disagree with the whole premise of the article for reasons already mentioned earlier in the thread.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:04 pm to Y.A. Tittle
quote:
Sadly, the world has changed in the last few decades, and it is no longer a safe place for children. Pedophiles and child molesters are more pervasive than ever.
I'm pretty sure the exact opposite is true. We just have social media now so every horrible thing is broadcast across FB, Twitter etc. Doesn't mean there are more pedophiles, kidnappings etc, you just are aware of them.
I wont buy into this fear mongering when I'm a parent. My brother and his wife allow my 2 nephews, 12 and 9, to ride their bikes all over the neighborhood, go play at the park 2 streets over etc. Have even left them home alone for 20 mins while they run to the store. The other parents think they're crazy. They won't allow their 12 yr olds to ride their bike around the block by themselves. That's fricked up. That generation is gonna be a bunch of pussies scared of their shadow.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:05 pm to TIGRLEE
just put kids in bubbles. no harm will ever come to them
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:06 pm to SirSaintly
quote:
I'm pretty sure the exact opposite is true. We just have social media now so every horrible thing is broadcast across FB, Twitter etc. Doesn't mean there are more pedophiles, kidnappings etc, you just are aware of them.
THIS - absolutely this.
Same way people think society is dumber - It's not. same amount of idiots as always, but now they have 24/7 access to a public outlet for their moronic thoughts.
This post was edited on 3/4/15 at 12:07 pm
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:09 pm to cwill
quote:
According to the nation's top experts, children are actually safer from physical and sexual abuse than they have been for decades. A National Incidence Study of Child Abuse and Neglect issued by the Department of Health and Human Services found that both physical and sexual abuse of children have dropped significantly over the past 20 years: From 2005 to 2006, an estimated 553,000 children suffered physical, sexual or emotional abuse, down 26 percent from the estimated 743,200 abuse victims in 1993. And between 1993 and 2005, the number of sexually abused children dropped 38 percent, while number of children who experienced physical abuse fell by 15 percent and those who were emotionally abused declined by 27 percent.
What could have caused this decline?
I'd like to hear some hypotheses.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:09 pm to TIGRLEE
quote:
Not really at all.
Are purposely trying to miss the point?
I see now that the author of the blog post arrives at the same conclusion while (supposedly) disagreeing about the "world is more dangerous today" part. I don't find much of this to be credible (seriously, the police chief?).
Clearly, parents should make their best judgment of a situation. Sleepovers in general are not scary. Car travel is scary. How much due diligence do you put into investigating the driving background and skills of any other parent that you let your kid ride with? As I said, that is infinitely more dangerous than this boogeyman of sleepovers.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:10 pm to Ole Geauxt
quote:
Its a different world now than when my kids were around.
yeah
it's a lot safer
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:10 pm to uway
quote:
What could have caused this decline?
I'd like to hear some hypotheses.
Internet porn. Weirdos can get their Jollies without having to do it irl now.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:11 pm to uway
quote:
What could have caused this decline?
spread of information, killing ignorance (which makes things seem worse, when it actually makes it better)
development of humanity, namely due to living in abundance and the spread of information
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:12 pm to uway
With physical abuse, I think the decline is simply due to the fact that there has been more awareness around the fact that domestic abuse is unacceptable. let's be real, in the 50's, it was common for men to be in charge of the household and slapping the ole lady around was nothing to raise an eyebrow at.
Abuse breeds a vicious cycle so children who grew up in households like that, thought that was normal and would continue the same pattern as their parents. As society has developed, and women have become equals, abuse has declined (women are sticking up for themselves, their voices are being heard, bla bla bla), and so less children are growing up in abusive households, and not continuing the cycle of abuse.
Just my $0.02
eta: In other words, what Slowflowpro said in far less words
Abuse breeds a vicious cycle so children who grew up in households like that, thought that was normal and would continue the same pattern as their parents. As society has developed, and women have become equals, abuse has declined (women are sticking up for themselves, their voices are being heard, bla bla bla), and so less children are growing up in abusive households, and not continuing the cycle of abuse.
Just my $0.02
eta: In other words, what Slowflowpro said in far less words
This post was edited on 3/4/15 at 12:15 pm
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