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The Greatest Dragon Movie of All Time. Full Review. Click Here. If Your A Man.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 8:14 am
Posted on 12/9/10 at 8:14 am
Starring Christian Bale (Pre Batman), Gerald Butler (Pre 300) and Matthew McConauhey (Post A Time To Kill).
Yes, I'm talking REIGN OF FIRE. This is like a futuristic dragon version of Top Gun. Only Maverick is English and Goose doesn't die. And none of them fly a plane.
The time is somewhere in the 2020's. Bale plays Quinn Abercromby, that's right, Abercromby. Got a problem? How bout let me take my shirt off. Still got a problem? I don't think so. He leads other English people and is nice to kids. Well he's a got a dragon problem, but he doesn't call the exterminator, the exterminator shows up on his own.
And by exterminator I mean McConaughey. DENTON VAN ZAN. The only way this name could have been better was if it were Norris Van Damme, and at one point I think someone actually called him that. For 45 minutes you are filled with suspense and wonder, wondering when it's going to happen, then it does: the shirt flies off, panties immediately drop. Excellently crafted suspense by the director of one episode of MacGyver, one episode of Baywatch and Elektra.
The Buckle and Van Damme hate each other. Van Damme gives the orders. Then they team up and in the greatest moment of camaraderie ever recorded of film happens when Van Damme tells Hollister: "You lead. I follow." I cried.
They fight the male dragon. Van Damme in order to gain some extra time for J Crew and his future girl, Jumps off the top of a tower with just his ax!! Could it be the dragon killer bad arse is going to kill the dragon with just his ax??? We all wait as he flies through the air for 10-15 seconds. The dragon approaches. Van Damme still floating mid air screaming. Cut to Dragon. Cut to Van Damme. Repeat four to five times. Who's it gonna be???? *spoiler* Dragon wins. Bites him, and flies off. *end spoiler* This scene is like watching the dunk contest, the crowd is on their feet, MJ jumps from the free-throw line.... And rims out and falls and breaks his ankle. But this gives Tommy Hillfiger time. The dragon apparantly doesn't shoot fire anymore. He only walks on the ground and stalks humans. Good for humans, bad for dragon. Dragon gets an ironic fire explosion thingy shot into his mouth.
Only problem with this movie is the American dies and the terrorist win. Or whatever Aeropostale's country was. The movie had a good premise, then they started filming. I say remake it, we need more remakes, only changing the fact that the American is the hero cause this is America. Yeah, we invented the missionary position. Your welcome.
Yes, I'm talking REIGN OF FIRE. This is like a futuristic dragon version of Top Gun. Only Maverick is English and Goose doesn't die. And none of them fly a plane.
The time is somewhere in the 2020's. Bale plays Quinn Abercromby, that's right, Abercromby. Got a problem? How bout let me take my shirt off. Still got a problem? I don't think so. He leads other English people and is nice to kids. Well he's a got a dragon problem, but he doesn't call the exterminator, the exterminator shows up on his own.
And by exterminator I mean McConaughey. DENTON VAN ZAN. The only way this name could have been better was if it were Norris Van Damme, and at one point I think someone actually called him that. For 45 minutes you are filled with suspense and wonder, wondering when it's going to happen, then it does: the shirt flies off, panties immediately drop. Excellently crafted suspense by the director of one episode of MacGyver, one episode of Baywatch and Elektra.
The Buckle and Van Damme hate each other. Van Damme gives the orders. Then they team up and in the greatest moment of camaraderie ever recorded of film happens when Van Damme tells Hollister: "You lead. I follow." I cried.
They fight the male dragon. Van Damme in order to gain some extra time for J Crew and his future girl, Jumps off the top of a tower with just his ax!! Could it be the dragon killer bad arse is going to kill the dragon with just his ax??? We all wait as he flies through the air for 10-15 seconds. The dragon approaches. Van Damme still floating mid air screaming. Cut to Dragon. Cut to Van Damme. Repeat four to five times. Who's it gonna be???? *spoiler* Dragon wins. Bites him, and flies off. *end spoiler* This scene is like watching the dunk contest, the crowd is on their feet, MJ jumps from the free-throw line.... And rims out and falls and breaks his ankle. But this gives Tommy Hillfiger time. The dragon apparantly doesn't shoot fire anymore. He only walks on the ground and stalks humans. Good for humans, bad for dragon. Dragon gets an ironic fire explosion thingy shot into his mouth.
Only problem with this movie is the American dies and the terrorist win. Or whatever Aeropostale's country was. The movie had a good premise, then they started filming. I say remake it, we need more remakes, only changing the fact that the American is the hero cause this is America. Yeah, we invented the missionary position. Your welcome.
This post was edited on 12/9/10 at 8:21 am
14
Posted on 12/9/10 at 8:16 am to iwyLSUiwy
never.ending.story.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 8:17 am to iwyLSUiwy
Posted on 12/9/10 at 8:17 am to iwyLSUiwy
Awesome movie. I saw this one in theaters, and left loving it. Just a cool and interesting take on a typically "magical" subject matter.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 8:24 am to GeauxLSUGeaux
quote:
never.ending.story.
Thanks for reminding me. I left something off.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 8:32 am to iwyLSUiwy
Posted on 12/9/10 at 8:33 am to iwyLSUiwy
Dragon Slayer from 1981..
Posted on 12/9/10 at 8:36 am to iwyLSUiwy
That was a dog, not a dragon.
Reign of Fire was a good movie, but not what I expected from the scant amount of marketing that it had. I expected more of an Independence Day with Dragons instead of aliens.
You'd think with CGI having been around for so long a decent dragon movie would have been done by now. The one with Dennis quaid and Sean Connery sucked, and Eragon was ok but it doesn't look like they will finish that series.
Reign of Fire was a good movie, but not what I expected from the scant amount of marketing that it had. I expected more of an Independence Day with Dragons instead of aliens.
You'd think with CGI having been around for so long a decent dragon movie would have been done by now. The one with Dennis quaid and Sean Connery sucked, and Eragon was ok but it doesn't look like they will finish that series.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 8:41 am to alajones
Reign Of Fire..... 
I love that movie.
I love that movie.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 8:47 am to iwyLSUiwy
I loved Reign of Fire for a lot of the same reasons I love the Walking Dead. The whole survival aspect after a catastrophic event changes everything. And I didn't even realize that was Gerard Butler until I watched it again like 6 months ago. Before that I'd probably seen it 8 or 10 times and never noticed it. AND easily my favorite Mathew Mconacadconangeheaksfdheayy(sp) movie followed closely by Frailty. Other than that and maybe Two For The Money I can think of no movies he's done that I liked.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 8:51 am to CocomoLSU
quote:
Awesome movie.
Bit of a stretch maybe. If something being extremely cliche and over the top doesn't bother you at all. I like the idea of it, just not how it was delivered.
I think I enjoyed at the theatre too when I was 15 or 16, somewhere around there. But I was cracking up laughing for the most part when I watched it the other day.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 8:54 am to iwyLSUiwy
Pete's Dragon
Posted on 12/9/10 at 9:05 am to Michael J Cocks
quote:
Two For The Money
How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days is a great chick flick. But yeah, %95 of his movies suck.
I plan on doing more of these reviews and I'm sure a lot of people will like the terrible movies I make fun of. O well.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 9:12 am to iwyLSUiwy
quote:
Bit of a stretch maybe.
If something being extremely cliche and over the top doesn't bother you at all. I like the idea of it, just not how it was delivered.
I think I enjoyed at the theatre too when I was 15 or 16, somewhere around there. But I was cracking up laughing for the most part when I watched it the other day.
I just thought it was different. And I guess, like MJC, I like the post-apocalyptic kinds of movies as well. I thought the story was believable enough, and although Matthew Mcnahndhenndghy was a bit over the top, I still liked him in it. I also liked how dark it was and how cool the dragons looked.
The Star Wars play was awesome.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 9:17 am to CocomoLSU
quote:
I just thought it was different. And I guess, like MJC, I like the post-apocalyptic kinds of movies as well. I thought the story was believable enough, and although Matthew Mcnahndhenndghy was a bit over the top, I still liked him in it. I also liked how dark it was and how cool the dragons looked.
The Star Wars play was awesome.
This. I thought the movie was great. A ton of fun.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 9:27 am to iwyLSUiwy
quote:
iwyLSUiwy
sorry I didn't give you props for the writing style before immediately defending the movie, but I did LOL a few times at your review fwiw.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 9:50 am to lacajun069
quote:
Dragon Slayer from 1981..
Great movie! Need to watch again soon.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 9:50 am to iwyLSUiwy
Oh and
quote:
Norris Van Damme
will be the name of my first born son.
Posted on 12/9/10 at 10:25 am to Michael J Cocks
quote:
sorry I didn't give you props for the writing style before immediately defending the movie, but I did LOL a few times at your review fwiw
O no problem man.
that's all I was goin for was a couple laughs.Posted on 12/9/10 at 10:26 am to etm512
quote:
will be the name of my first born son
The doctor better not slap your baby when he comes out unless he wants an arse whooping.
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