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re: Why do people on this board act like humans are the weakest creatures on earth?
Posted on 2/20/19 at 2:41 pm to Hawgnsincebirth55
Posted on 2/20/19 at 2:41 pm to Hawgnsincebirth55
quote:
I would put that bald chimp in a rear naked choke and put that motherfricker to sleep!
A chimp has short body and long arms. Even if you were spotted a locked-in position the chimp could either reach up and back then twist your fricking head loose or around and back, insert his monkey paw up your arse then hand you your prostate.
0
Posted on 2/20/19 at 2:43 pm to Loaner1231
COME AT ME BRO
Posted on 2/20/19 at 2:44 pm to Hawgnsincebirth55
Joe Rogan talking about chimps I think Joe knows a few things about MMA fighting.
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:18 pm to RB10
quote:You realize in my example the human has the size and strength advantage as well....
The only advantage a human has over any decently sized wild animal is the ability to craft and utilize tools.
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:19 pm to ReauxlTide222
quote:Crush its windpipe or cave in its eyeballs and then have its way with the chimp
Pride, what is the human going to do to finish off and kill this chimp?
This post was edited on 2/20/19 at 3:20 pm
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:22 pm to lsupride87
quote:
You realize in my example the human has the size and strength advantage as well....
Elephants, giraffes, gazelles, etc have size and strength advantages over lions too
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:23 pm to lsupride87
quote:
You realize in my example the human has the size and strength advantage as well....
Means nothing. A wild chimp would brutalize the toughest human 99 times out of 100 if the human didn't have a weapon to use.
The fact you are arguing a point that has, literally, zero evidence to back it up is hilarious. Meanwhile, there is a bevy of evidence that shows what's happened when human beings have encountered wild chimps.
This post was edited on 2/20/19 at 3:25 pm
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:24 pm to lsupride87
quote:
Crush its windpipe or cave in its eyeballs and then have its way with the chimp
How do you keep the chimp from ripping your dick off if your hands are around its throat? Its arms are longer than yours.
Do you just ask nicely?
This post was edited on 2/20/19 at 3:28 pm
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:25 pm to messyjesse
quote:wait so the secret to beating a world class fighter is to run in wild and just start clawing and throwing wild kicks and punches at him?! What you just said is a fricking point for the humans while this 4 ft tall ape comes charging at him DC is just gonna time it and roundhouse kick him to the face.
While you're sizing up the chimp wondering which way he'll go and what angle you can grab him and etc etc etc he's charging you full stop with the sole intention of hooking your nose right off your face and biting your arm through the bone.
You can't apply MMA-style reasoning and deduction (or even skill for that matter) to a wild animal. They don't have a gameplan.
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:26 pm to Thib-a-doe Tiger
quote:
gazelles
quote:
strength advantages over lions
Also, an elephant will face frick a lion, same with a giraffe
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:27 pm to TigerstuckinMS
quote:You use your 140 pound weight advantage, your 2 foot height advantage, and your approximate 1.5 x strength advantage
How do you keep the chimp from ripping off your dick if your hands are around its throat? Ask nicely?
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:27 pm to TigerstuckinMS
Becayse
quote:by putting him in a rear naked choke with your heels hooked around his waist???? Do you know literally zero about fighting???
How do you keep the chimp from ripping off your dick if your hands are around its throat? Ask nicely?
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:29 pm to Hawgnsincebirth55
quote:
by putting him in a rear naked choke with your heels hooked around his waist???? Do you know literally zero about fighting???
Hey, I'm not the moron saying that an average human with any martial arts training is going to kick the shite out of the average chimp.
By the way, if you do manage to do that to a chimp, it'll just rip your fricking feet off. Because, you know, they're right there by its waist and its hands are free and yours aren't.
This post was edited on 2/20/19 at 3:31 pm
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:29 pm to Thib-a-doe Tiger
quote:Can we go back to this?
gazelles, etc have size and strength advantages over lions too
This is by far the dumbest comment in this thread
Gazelles weigh about 350 lbs less than lions on average
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:29 pm to Hawgnsincebirth55
I’ve said before and I’ll say it again.
I think I could take a tiger in single combat if you gave me some gladiator equipment beforehand.
I think I could take a tiger in single combat if you gave me some gladiator equipment beforehand.
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:32 pm to lsupride87
You’re right, I was thinking of Eland. Don’t know why I put gazelle
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:32 pm to lsupride87
quote:
You use your 140 pound weight advantage, your 2 foot height advantage, and your approximate 1.5 x strength advantage
All well and good until the chimp gets a hold of one of your limbs and literally rips it off.
What do you think a human would do to use the height advantage? Throw some jabs?
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:33 pm to RB10
quote:I was simply correcting your misstatement
Means nothing
quote:There is also a bevy of evidence on what happens when a trained human fighter encounters an average human.....
Meanwhile, there is a bevy of evidence that shows what's happened when human beings have encountered wild chimps.
In both scenarios the average human gets fricked up to the point the chimp or the fighter decides to walk away
This post was edited on 2/20/19 at 3:34 pm
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:34 pm to Big_Slim
Nothing quite gets this board hard like exaggerating the abilities of animals.
Posted on 2/20/19 at 3:34 pm to RB10
quote:Wait a minute, the human is stronger than the chimp. So if the chimp can rip the humans arm off (it cant), the human can rip the chimps arm off even easier
All well and good until the chimp gets a hold of one of your limbs and literally rips it off.
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