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re: What was the lowest/darkest/toughest time in ur life & how did u pull yourself out of it?
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:44 am to 187undercover
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:44 am to 187undercover
Damn man. I feel for you.
1
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:45 am to RudeCats
quote:
Motivate me, I am rather young I would love to hear everyones experience with overcoming adversity.
My father was in a coma for 2 months thanks to a Drunk Driver. When he "woke up" he wasn't my father anymore. He was mentally handicapped. Physically he was like a stroke victim (half his body was paralyzed). Mentally he was 10% of the man he was. He hardly spoke, easily angered, and usually didn't recognize me.
My mom decided to take care of him. I decided to drink a lot. I wasn't there for my mom.
For the first year or two I was obsessed with the DUI (he was never charged with DUI, he was buddies with the police chief). I thought of ways to kill the guy. I also begged God to take me.
My dad lived on for another 10 years, mentally and physically handicapped. It took time, but I finally realized that I have a loving family and sons to care for. I started drinking less, and I finally realized I should try to be the role model that my dad was. Those are tough shoes to fill, but I'll do the best that I can. It's what he would want.
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:46 am to fr33manator
quote:
and then my brother
I remember that. We may not always get along, but I hope it's gotten a little better for you. I know that will never be completely healed.
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:46 am to tgrbaitn08
Yes this is the story indeed.
After I moved back to LA a former employee called me specifically to tell me he had killed himself in prison.
As I said it got worse. The daughter didn't deserve this. Jeana did not deserve this act of evil.
If hell is worse than this and other things associated with life then it must be a place no man wishes to ever stay. I can't imagine a place as bad as my own mind that week after her death.
I took off and did not sleep for 4 days I believe. Very little. I didn't eat much and never left my room once. My landlord visited me twice to check on me. He was solid. I visited the police a few times also.
As I was told to withdraw any association so the media would not catch on (media would have been all over a love triangle thing the police mentioned I did as they said). I laid low and then left town.
After I moved back to LA a former employee called me specifically to tell me he had killed himself in prison.
As I said it got worse. The daughter didn't deserve this. Jeana did not deserve this act of evil.
If hell is worse than this and other things associated with life then it must be a place no man wishes to ever stay. I can't imagine a place as bad as my own mind that week after her death.
I took off and did not sleep for 4 days I believe. Very little. I didn't eat much and never left my room once. My landlord visited me twice to check on me. He was solid. I visited the police a few times also.
As I was told to withdraw any association so the media would not catch on (media would have been all over a love triangle thing the police mentioned I did as they said). I laid low and then left town.
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:49 am to tgrbaitn08
The thread was for this baw.
Meant to slap some sense into him. Shake it. Love goes on. It may suck for awhile, but you will meet new people and you will be a might for them with whatever story you have to tell.
Meant to slap some sense into him. Shake it. Love goes on. It may suck for awhile, but you will meet new people and you will be a might for them with whatever story you have to tell.
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:49 am to northshorebamaman
quote:IMO you are a true hero.
northshorebamaman
Most people don't truly appreciate TBI and coma. Soap operas would have you believe that coma is a state of sleep, and then one day you wake up and everything is back to normal. Congratulations with you and good luck with any issues you still face.
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:50 am to 187undercover
I can’t imagine how helpless you probably felt.
The way I’m wired it would have driven me crazy
The way I’m wired it would have driven me crazy
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:50 am to TH03
quote:
I remember that. We may not always get along, but I hope it's gotten a little better for you. I know that will never be completely healed.
Some days are easier than others. And you learn to find love and happiness and to keep their memories alive.
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:52 am to northshorebamaman
Impressive northshore.
Even more incredible than your recovery is you’re actually a decent Bama poster
Even more incredible than your recovery is you’re actually a decent Bama poster
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:54 am to Asharad
quote:
My father was in a coma for 2 months thanks to a Drunk Driver. When he "woke up" he wasn't my father anymore. He was mentally handicapped. Physically he was like a stroke victim (half his body was paralyzed). Mentally he was 10% of the man he was. He hardly spoke, easily angered,
This was a huge problem for me after my coma. Anything beyond a single soothing voice would send me into a rage. The doctors told me that my brain had become unused to processing new info and that caused the anger. It actually gave me physical pain to listen to a conversation.
I'm sorry about your father. I hope you guys found peace and you both realized that his anger was just a medical manifestation.
This post was edited on 8/3/19 at 1:42 am
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:55 am to Asharad
quote:
Most people don't truly appreciate TBI and coma. Soap operas would have you believe that coma is a state of sleep, and then one day you wake up and everything is back to normal. Congratulations with you and good luck with any issues you still face.
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:56 am to Sun God
quote:
Even more incredible than your recovery is you’re actually a decent Bama poster
Posted on 8/3/19 at 12:59 am to TH03
I've learned to bury it
I rarely think about it. The brain has an amazing way of burying grief and pain deep into the subconscious mind.
I did feel guilt. I should have arrived earlier. I should have taken his weird actions the week before more seriously. Was I a bitch? Was I scared? I'm a pussy? I wasn't there to protect.
The whole ordeal changed me. Now I will not hesitate to put a POS in a coffin if anyone ever threatens a loved one again.
Not saying I would kill them per se but they would damn well know I will find them and kill them without remorse or second thought if they harm my loved one.
And this has actually transpired before in a small scale event with my cousin.
My parents adopted my cousin after his mom died (my mom's sister) in 2011. About a year after her death he is playing basketball at Lakeshore elementary with a bunch of kids and adults older (adults in 18-22) and younger. He was new to LA from New Mexico and did not know the culture here. He was jumped for his phone. I remember him coming home and crying and pouting. I asked him what happened. He told me. I told my mom with years I'll be back. I went up there and I scared every one of those frickers so bad that the next day his phone was returned and money to boot.
Later I was told the fellas thought I was going to murder them and they all ran home. They were the cowards just as Octavio was.
I know I would not have had the courage to confront all them alone without what happened to Jeana.
So to this fella as I said, you will now have the ammo to be a force for good and change because of whatever event you have going on. You will be different and you will be unique. Soldier on and help a soul.
My cousin is now in the Navy defending our nation aboard the USS Goerge H Bush. He wrote me for Christmas and told me that the act I did for him back then was the first time anyone stood up for him and he has never forgotten it and did similar for a friend if his in the Army--he has army buds.
Be a force for good brother. Never let evil win.
I rarely think about it. The brain has an amazing way of burying grief and pain deep into the subconscious mind.
I did feel guilt. I should have arrived earlier. I should have taken his weird actions the week before more seriously. Was I a bitch? Was I scared? I'm a pussy? I wasn't there to protect.
The whole ordeal changed me. Now I will not hesitate to put a POS in a coffin if anyone ever threatens a loved one again.
Not saying I would kill them per se but they would damn well know I will find them and kill them without remorse or second thought if they harm my loved one.
And this has actually transpired before in a small scale event with my cousin.
My parents adopted my cousin after his mom died (my mom's sister) in 2011. About a year after her death he is playing basketball at Lakeshore elementary with a bunch of kids and adults older (adults in 18-22) and younger. He was new to LA from New Mexico and did not know the culture here. He was jumped for his phone. I remember him coming home and crying and pouting. I asked him what happened. He told me. I told my mom with years I'll be back. I went up there and I scared every one of those frickers so bad that the next day his phone was returned and money to boot.
Later I was told the fellas thought I was going to murder them and they all ran home. They were the cowards just as Octavio was.
I know I would not have had the courage to confront all them alone without what happened to Jeana.
So to this fella as I said, you will now have the ammo to be a force for good and change because of whatever event you have going on. You will be different and you will be unique. Soldier on and help a soul.
My cousin is now in the Navy defending our nation aboard the USS Goerge H Bush. He wrote me for Christmas and told me that the act I did for him back then was the first time anyone stood up for him and he has never forgotten it and did similar for a friend if his in the Army--he has army buds.
Be a force for good brother. Never let evil win.
Posted on 8/3/19 at 1:07 am to Asharad
quote:
My dad lived on for another 10 years, mentally and physically handicapped. It took time, but I finally realized that I have a loving family and sons to care for. I started drinking less, and I finally realized I should try to be the role model that my dad was. Those are tough shoes to fill, but I'll do the best that I can. It's what he would want.
My heart goes out to you My friend. I can't imagine that happening to my mother. I thought my story was rough. This is worse to me. I'm sorry for this event. This is what makes being human unique and stories need to be told for others to cope.
Posted on 8/3/19 at 1:11 am to lsunurse
quote:
I won't say my lowest time in my life because it is a story I only share with those closest to me.
Well that's not very helpful to him now... is it?
Posted on 8/3/19 at 1:12 am to tgrbaitn08
God.
All I can say. God. He is real. He is there. And although we may not see eye to eye I know he is still in charge and justice will forever be served in this life or the next.
I hold onto the promise given to eve if a savior and that light is all that matters. Yes I frick up and yes I do not wish to be perfect as being perfect here means you are prime rib for the demons among us, but I do wish to be when I die.
I wish to never remember anything about this life except for the love i have felt for those I loved so dearly. I want all memories of evil to vanish. I want a clean tongue; new heart; new body; I want to be cleansed of all evil in my own mind and heart and to be forgiven for all transgressions of my own against any man I have harmed.
If there is a god that serves this purpose, and I believe there is one, he will set me in a new path that will be ecstasy beyond human comprehension. If I did not believe this I might as well die now. Instead I will battle on. As fricked up as I may be mentally from many things I will never change into the monsters I've seen and experienced in my life.
All I can say. God. He is real. He is there. And although we may not see eye to eye I know he is still in charge and justice will forever be served in this life or the next.
I hold onto the promise given to eve if a savior and that light is all that matters. Yes I frick up and yes I do not wish to be perfect as being perfect here means you are prime rib for the demons among us, but I do wish to be when I die.
I wish to never remember anything about this life except for the love i have felt for those I loved so dearly. I want all memories of evil to vanish. I want a clean tongue; new heart; new body; I want to be cleansed of all evil in my own mind and heart and to be forgiven for all transgressions of my own against any man I have harmed.
If there is a god that serves this purpose, and I believe there is one, he will set me in a new path that will be ecstasy beyond human comprehension. If I did not believe this I might as well die now. Instead I will battle on. As fricked up as I may be mentally from many things I will never change into the monsters I've seen and experienced in my life.
Posted on 8/3/19 at 6:33 am to 187undercover
Incredible surreal story, thanks for sharing. This sounds like a Keith Morrison Dateline episode.
This post was edited on 8/3/19 at 6:44 am
Posted on 8/3/19 at 6:50 am to RudeCats
I figured out a way to make my life better. It took a while but I focused on a lot of short term goals rather than one 4 years away. I took an internship with a general contractor and went back to school. Got some experience while in school. Graduated from brcc and was hired full time. Finished my bachelors and was given a 25% raise automatically.
Posted on 8/3/19 at 7:03 am to RudeCats
Earlier this year I had a 3 year relationship blow up 2 days before marrying the girl. Loved her with everything I had. Hit me hard for a while. Had a bunch of other life things hit and start piling up while I was trying to get over that. I don’t know how you feel about God and everything but I can 100% truthfully tell you that my relationship with him and just finding a good group of people to surround myself with helped me more than anything.
Posted on 8/3/19 at 7:03 am to NWarty
If you came out of the closet and then turned trans, are you attracted to women as a woman, or are you attracted to men as a woman?
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