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re: What was the best one liners your high school coaches used?
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:10 am to 610man
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:10 am to 610man
In one of my Tiger Band years, Bear Bryant was leaning against the goalpost at Tiger Stadium, his classic pose. Photographers were buzzing around as our Tiger mascot approaches The Bear, paw extended. Bear shakes his paw as our boy says "Coach, its an honor to meet you. We're going to kick your arse tonight." Bear just grinned and said "Son, you're going to need some help." Bear was correct.
This post was edited on 1/27/18 at 11:11 am
1
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:13 am to robchand58
quote:
Photographers were buzzing around as our Tiger mascot approaches The Bear,
Was that when BD was the mascot?
This post was edited on 1/27/18 at 11:15 am
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:14 am to FlatTownDawgTiger
" boy all your athletic genes must've ran down your Mom arse crack and ended up a stain on her mattress "
" slower than a hobbled possum "
" couldn't outrun a fat woman "
" couldn't tear your way through a wet paper bag "
" slower than a hobbled possum "
" couldn't outrun a fat woman "
" couldn't tear your way through a wet paper bag "
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:19 am to FlatTownDawgTiger
My Uncle Jessie was our football head coach and he was trying to get across the message that #25 on the other team was a really good runningback:
“Fellas, we need to pay close attention to #25, he is very lucrative”.
He also told a player that was dogging it in practice to “get his arse out of his finger”.
“Fellas, we need to pay close attention to #25, he is very lucrative”.
He also told a player that was dogging it in practice to “get his arse out of his finger”.
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:21 am to jimmyjohn19
HS football coach, former All SEC linebacker and Vietnam Counter Intelligence, always replied when he heard a groan regarding announced length of practice "shite, I could hold a bear by the balls for 3 hours" and we believed him while chuckling under our breath
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:25 am to 610man
Pulling tires at the end of a two a day practice in 98 degree heat and we are drag arse'n big time. Coach screams "yall couldn't pull a greased dick out of a mules arse!! Get the frick off my field!"
Good memories...
Good memories...
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:26 am to FlatTownDawgTiger
"I swear son, you'd lose your dick if it wasn't attached to you"
"God damn it! You're a day late and a dollar short!!"
"God damn it! You're a day late and a dollar short!!"
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:26 am to HogBalls
We wouldn’t stretch before practice when I played.. player, “coach, why don’t we stretch before practice?”
Coach, “y’all ever seen a cheetah stretch before he chases his prey? No, you don’t! On the line we are running!!”
Coach, “y’all ever seen a cheetah stretch before he chases his prey? No, you don’t! On the line we are running!!”
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:28 am to FlatTownDawgTiger
"Son, you must be Agile, Mobile and Hostile."
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:29 am to FlatTownDawgTiger
My junior year in high school playing Chalmette in our homecoming game and we made a goal line stance to win the game and I still remember our D coordinator saying “that shite made my dick hard” as we ran off the field.
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:31 am to FlatTownDawgTiger
“god damn boy! You can’t even piss hard!”
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:36 am to FlatTownDawgTiger
My freshman football coach, "You can't throw a forearm for shite. Let me see you throw one here(slapping his own chest).
I then threw my best forearm ever and broke his rib. Greatest day of my life.
I then threw my best forearm ever and broke his rib. Greatest day of my life.
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:41 am to FlatTownDawgTiger
"You guys are so fricked up, you got me fricked up and when I'm fricked up the whole goddamn program is fricked up.
Posted on 1/27/18 at 11:44 am to 25smeckles
quote:
“that sounded like a rabbit pissin on cotton”
What year did you play for Deuce Harrison
Posted on 1/27/18 at 12:17 pm to FlatTownDawgTiger
My football coach told me, "Son, when you run full speed your feet stay in the same place too long."
Posted on 1/27/18 at 12:40 pm to LSURussian
One I heard about second hand from when Saban was here... we played Arizona or Arizona State away and beat the shite out of them. In the locker room after the game, all the players took a knee around him and he says “well boys, we came to their house, pissed all over the floor and they didn’t do a damn thing about it. Let’s go home” /speech
This post was edited on 1/27/18 at 12:47 pm
Posted on 1/27/18 at 12:43 pm to 610man
Assistant basketball coach anytime someone made a great move but missed the shot: “5 dollar move, 2 cent shot”.
Every day after practice we ran laps, suicides, etc. near the end coach would always check his watch and say “5 minutes till Wapner”. That when people’s court came on with Judge Wapner. He apparently liked that show!
Sad now since coach just passed from a brain tumor. I think about those days and wish I appreciated them more. I use some of the lines stil with my boys. Along with others that I can’t think of off the top of my head.
Every day after practice we ran laps, suicides, etc. near the end coach would always check his watch and say “5 minutes till Wapner”. That when people’s court came on with Judge Wapner. He apparently liked that show!
Sad now since coach just passed from a brain tumor. I think about those days and wish I appreciated them more. I use some of the lines stil with my boys. Along with others that I can’t think of off the top of my head.
Posted on 1/27/18 at 12:43 pm to FlatTownDawgTiger
While in a hitting slump -
“Son, you couldn’t hit water if you fell out of a boat!”.
While playing soft -
“Come to the sideline son and remove your tampon so you can go back in and play like a man for awhile!”.
And:
“” Boy I think my grandpa has some testosterone patches you can use!” You need them!”.
Criticizing your play on the field-
“Son, you’re like the cow that gives the best milk in town and then kicks the fricking bucket over!”.
and
“Boy, you’d frick up a one car parade!”.
“Son, you couldn’t hit water if you fell out of a boat!”.
While playing soft -
“Come to the sideline son and remove your tampon so you can go back in and play like a man for awhile!”.
And:
“” Boy I think my grandpa has some testosterone patches you can use!” You need them!”.
Criticizing your play on the field-
“Son, you’re like the cow that gives the best milk in town and then kicks the fricking bucket over!”.
and
“Boy, you’d frick up a one car parade!”.
This post was edited on 1/27/18 at 1:55 pm
Posted on 1/27/18 at 12:48 pm to FlatTownDawgTiger
“i bet you could frick up a wet dream”
Posted on 1/27/18 at 1:24 pm to westsidetiger4
Now son, quit staring off into space like a dog fricking, look at me when I’m talking.
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