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Message
Strangest conversation you’ve ever had
Posted on 4/5/18 at 11:54 pm
Posted on 4/5/18 at 11:54 pm
Was in the waiting room for the dentist the other day and this random dude strikes up a conversation with me. I can’t quite remember how it came up, but he started telling me about how he was a die hard Idaho State women’s tennis fan. The guy started telling me about all these random stats and basically gave me an oral history lesson on Idaho State’s women’s tennis program. The guy continued to talk me ear off and I started to just tune him out and give him the polite “Uh huh” and a nod like I was actually paying attention. I then sort of lost track of the conversation, but it ended with him giving me a recipe for his grandmother’s crispitos. Nice guy but, Jesus Christ, it was a weird arse experience.
22
Posted on 4/5/18 at 11:57 pm to lsudave1
quote:
talk me ear off
Did you share your lucky charms with him?
Posted on 4/6/18 at 12:01 am to lsudave1
Posted on 4/6/18 at 12:03 am to Anonymous95
Posted on 4/6/18 at 12:25 am to lsudave1
I had to go to court the other day show proof of registration for my vehicle.
As I'm sitting in court waiting for the judge to show up this guy sits down in the chair next to mine and I can just feel him staring at me. He finally says my name and I look over at him. I recognize him but can't put a name with his face. He says "hey man it's JoeBlow from the pizza place." It reminds me I worked at a pizza place the summer after I graduated high school with this guy. We exchange pleasantries and the judge comes in.
Everyone is quiet while he calls people up because it's a courtroom and you're supposed to be quiet. My neighbor doesn't know this and starts in on why he is there today:
"Yeah, I got caught stealing Red Bulls from Wal-Mart. I had four cans in one arm and my 9 month old in the other arm running from the police that are posted at the front. Couldn't tell you why I did it. I shoved one and got away for about 10 feet before the other one tripped me up."
He then shows me his knuckles and all four are just a mangled, scabbed-over mess. He tells me that's from the cop tripping him as he made the concrete of the parking lot.
"Its cool though, it's only misdemeanors."
About this time a police officer walks up, taps him on the shoulder and escorts him out. Don't know what ended up happening to him.
Weird guy.
TLDR: Guy I slightly know from 15 yrs ago tells me trashy story during court proceedings and gets escorted out of said courtroom.
As I'm sitting in court waiting for the judge to show up this guy sits down in the chair next to mine and I can just feel him staring at me. He finally says my name and I look over at him. I recognize him but can't put a name with his face. He says "hey man it's JoeBlow from the pizza place." It reminds me I worked at a pizza place the summer after I graduated high school with this guy. We exchange pleasantries and the judge comes in.
Everyone is quiet while he calls people up because it's a courtroom and you're supposed to be quiet. My neighbor doesn't know this and starts in on why he is there today:
"Yeah, I got caught stealing Red Bulls from Wal-Mart. I had four cans in one arm and my 9 month old in the other arm running from the police that are posted at the front. Couldn't tell you why I did it. I shoved one and got away for about 10 feet before the other one tripped me up."
He then shows me his knuckles and all four are just a mangled, scabbed-over mess. He tells me that's from the cop tripping him as he made the concrete of the parking lot.
"Its cool though, it's only misdemeanors."
About this time a police officer walks up, taps him on the shoulder and escorts him out. Don't know what ended up happening to him.
Weird guy.
TLDR: Guy I slightly know from 15 yrs ago tells me trashy story during court proceedings and gets escorted out of said courtroom.
Posted on 4/6/18 at 12:32 am to lsudave1
I never have to wait for the dentist.
Posted on 4/6/18 at 12:33 am to lsudave1
Do you live in Idaho? Kind of frames the story,
Posted on 4/6/18 at 12:40 am to IAmNERD
quote:
my 9 month old in the other arm running from the police
quote:
the other one tripped me up." He then shows me his knuckles and all four are just a mangled, scabbed-over mess. He tells me that's from the cop tripping him as he made the concrete of the parking lot.
So did the baby die or what?
Posted on 4/6/18 at 12:45 am to Havoc
quote:
So did the baby die or what?
I couldn't tell you. That was word for word what he said and that's the only mention of the kid. That's why it was pretty strange to me.
I doubt it though since "all he got were misdemeanors "
This post was edited on 4/6/18 at 12:48 am
Posted on 4/6/18 at 12:47 am to lsudave1
quote:
The guy continued to talk me ear off
Reminds me of The Onion bit about “Area Man a Little Too into Stevie Ray Vaughan.”
The guy would hang out in a bar and work some trivia about SRV into any conversation.
Posted on 4/6/18 at 1:04 am to Minnesota Tiger
No I live in Louisiana which makes it even weirder lol
Posted on 4/6/18 at 1:05 am to lsudave1
I had a roommate my freshman year of college. I made the unfortunate mistake of giving him a ride somewhere (don't even remember where). I still remember stopping at the red light of Ben Hurr and Burbank when he started to ask me what I thought of my stepsister. This (now former) stepsister was ugly as shite, kind of overweight, and just 'crusty' looking. He then proceeded to ask if I would ever have sex with her given the chance. I think I remember him saying "Oh yea I'd hit it if I could and was in your position" and "Yea I think she's pretty hot, don't you?" While I knew he was fricking with me and knew I was getting sick just thinking about it, he kept persisting hoping I would budge throughout the entire 20 minute ride. Most uncomfortable conversation I've ever had. To this day I remind him of how god damn awkward that car drive was. He lurks on here. I hope he sees this lmao.
This post was edited on 4/6/18 at 1:11 am
Posted on 4/6/18 at 1:11 am to lsudave1
quote:
basically gave me an oral
go on...
Posted on 4/6/18 at 2:05 am to lsudave1
A few years my lovely wife and I dined at the former La Provençal in Paris. After we were seated another English speaking couple sat down beside us. The gentleman and his wife were somewhat older than me and my wife, but they had that easy gracious way of starting a conversation that older couples sometimes have.
The gentleman had been in London to see about some business with the Intercontinental Exchange London Interbank and he his this wife were on holiday in Paris. He said they did this annually and always ate at this restaurant.
The older couple provided such fascinating conversation that we had no objection when they turned their chairs around and faced our table. They told us they always ate the same exotic meal each time. Our food came but they told us go ahead and dine as their food required some degree of preparation. We had halfway finished our meal when their order came.
The had ordered some meat served exceedingly rare in the Tartare fashion or like carpaccio. However, when the meat was revealed to be horsemeat, I forgot every bit of the prior conversation. Lady Ammer blanched and would have fainted if I had not immediately ordered some brandy to restore her constitution.
The gentleman and his wife then revealed- with blood dripping from the sides of their mouths- that the horsemeat did wonders for their libidos especially the wife's.
TL/DR. Ate in Paris. Met couple who ate raw horsemeat to improve sex life
The gentleman had been in London to see about some business with the Intercontinental Exchange London Interbank and he his this wife were on holiday in Paris. He said they did this annually and always ate at this restaurant.
The older couple provided such fascinating conversation that we had no objection when they turned their chairs around and faced our table. They told us they always ate the same exotic meal each time. Our food came but they told us go ahead and dine as their food required some degree of preparation. We had halfway finished our meal when their order came.
The had ordered some meat served exceedingly rare in the Tartare fashion or like carpaccio. However, when the meat was revealed to be horsemeat, I forgot every bit of the prior conversation. Lady Ammer blanched and would have fainted if I had not immediately ordered some brandy to restore her constitution.
The gentleman and his wife then revealed- with blood dripping from the sides of their mouths- that the horsemeat did wonders for their libidos especially the wife's.
TL/DR. Ate in Paris. Met couple who ate raw horsemeat to improve sex life
Posted on 4/6/18 at 2:05 am to lsudave1
A few years ago my lovely wife and I dined at the former La Provençal in Paris. After we were seated another English speaking couple sat down beside us. The gentleman and his wife were somewhat older than me and my wife, but they had that easy gracious way of starting a conversation that older couples sometimes have.
The gentleman had been in London to see about some business with the Intercontinental Exchange London Interbank and he and his this wife were on holiday in Paris. He said they did this annually and always ate at this restaurant.
The older couple provided such fascinating conversation that we had no objection when they turned their chairs around and faced our table. They told us they always ate the same exotic meal each time. Our food came but they told us go ahead and dine as their food required some degree of preparation. We had halfway finished our meal when their order came.
The had ordered some meat served exceedingly rare in the Tartare fashion or like carpaccio. However, when the meat was revealed to be horsemeat, I forgot every bit of the prior conversation. Lady Ammer blanched and would have fainted if I had not immediately ordered a snifter of brandy to restore her constitution.
The gentleman and his wife then revealed- with blood dripping from the sides of their mouths- that the horsemeat did wonders for their libidos especially the wife's.
TL/DR. Ate in Paris. Met couple who ate raw horsemeat to improve sex life
The gentleman had been in London to see about some business with the Intercontinental Exchange London Interbank and he and his this wife were on holiday in Paris. He said they did this annually and always ate at this restaurant.
The older couple provided such fascinating conversation that we had no objection when they turned their chairs around and faced our table. They told us they always ate the same exotic meal each time. Our food came but they told us go ahead and dine as their food required some degree of preparation. We had halfway finished our meal when their order came.
The had ordered some meat served exceedingly rare in the Tartare fashion or like carpaccio. However, when the meat was revealed to be horsemeat, I forgot every bit of the prior conversation. Lady Ammer blanched and would have fainted if I had not immediately ordered a snifter of brandy to restore her constitution.
The gentleman and his wife then revealed- with blood dripping from the sides of their mouths- that the horsemeat did wonders for their libidos especially the wife's.
TL/DR. Ate in Paris. Met couple who ate raw horsemeat to improve sex life
This post was edited on 4/6/18 at 2:09 am
Posted on 4/6/18 at 2:22 am to lsudave1
InB4 the usual suspects come in to relate the wildest tale they can concoct as fact.
Posted on 4/6/18 at 2:24 am to Paul B Ammer
quote:
Paul B Ammer
Is that a true f’n story? If not, you’re a hell of a bull shitter.
Posted on 4/6/18 at 5:02 am to lsudave1
In a casino parking lot....
Old Bum: hey man, did you win any money?
Me: not really, we just came for the buffet(obvious lie)
Old Bum: can you help a brother out?
Me: Sorry, we don’t have any cash on us(while being sympathetic)
Old Bum: But I played ball with Pete Maravich!!!
My buddy and I looked at each other confused and in disbelief before walking away.
Old Bum: hey man, did you win any money?
Me: not really, we just came for the buffet(obvious lie)
Old Bum: can you help a brother out?
Me: Sorry, we don’t have any cash on us(while being sympathetic)
Old Bum: But I played ball with Pete Maravich!!!
My buddy and I looked at each other confused and in disbelief before walking away.
Posted on 4/6/18 at 6:03 am to lsudave1
A weird woman at work showed up with bandages all over. I made the mistake of asking her what happened. She had brought her cocker spaniel to the vet school to get "collected". the vet was jerking the dog off and the dog decided he didn't like it and flipped out and started biting folks. The vet and the weird woman both had to get stitched up. She then asked me if I would help her jerk her dog off.
Posted on 4/6/18 at 6:10 am to celltech1981
quote:
She then asked me if I would help her jerk her dog off.
I can't help but notice you have omitted your reply. Its ok, they needed help.
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