re: Need advice to get my girlfriend back

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I got into pills about a year and a half ago.

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I’m going to go ahead and apologize for assuming that everything you typed after this was either a complete lie, or that you sugarcoated the shite out of it and manipulated your story to make it seem like YOU are the victim

Most pillheads are the exact same.. lying, conniving, shitheads who lie and tell half truths for so long to cover up their true intentions and happenings, that people stop playing their damn games and believing them...


You made your bed... lay in it



FWIW - if a woman won’t stand by your side when you claim to need them the most, they weren’t marriage material anyway..

I've had some of these problems myself so I'll chime in with my two cents.

I'm not sure how long you've been clean at this point, but keep working on yourself--focus on your sobriety, hit the gym/exercise, start reading, meditate.

Give her some time before you contact her. After a few weeks, send her a message. Keep it simple and genuine. Try to avoid smothering with affection. Something like:

"Hey, I'm so sorry I kept this from you. You're important to me and I was afraid of disappointing you. I've been doing x,y,z and have been working really hard on bettering myself. Would you like to meet for coffee so we can talk more?"

I'm not an expert but I think the best thing you can do is be completely honest and SHOW her you're changing.

Also check out the SHAIR Podcast. It really helped me hearing people's stories. Hang in there, friend!

see a god damned counselor for fricks sake.

Hard Truth: she is better off without you. Love her by letting her go.

If you truly love her then respect her wishes and leave her alone. Stay sober and get on with your life. Prove to yourself that you can stay clean before damaging another person that tries to love you. Good luck. Going to church could be your salvation.

Never heard of Tianaa. Sounds like a horrible idea. Sounds like a kratom ripoff.

If this is real, you need to get your mojo back before you attempt to go after her. No offense, but you come off as a bit depressed and desperate. My best advice is for you first to start by eating healthy and getting into shape. Lift weights. Getting in to shape physically will help you mentally. Getting your confidence back will help rid your depression. Once that is done, you’ll be ready to approach her and you’ll be strong enough mentally to accept it and move on if she rejects you.

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I want her back so badly it fuels my sobriety and she won’t even talk to me.

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Unfortunately this is what happens when you lie to people to continue your habit. She stuck with you the first time and then you lied to her again.

You don't get to get her back just because THIS time you really did get clean. Coming back to you is her decision. You have no choice but to let her go.

Oh, and fueling your sobriety is not her job. It's up to you to maintain and fuel your own sobriety.

As a former SO of an addict, do her a favor and move on. Being a codependent is a living hell. You gave her some bigtime issues. Addicts don't just hurt themselves. They hurt everyone around them.

I know addicts are selfish people. For once, think about someone besides yourself and let this girl move on with her life. Good for you getting sober. Now find someone else, and try not to frick up that relationship.

So she stuck by your side the whole time you were using...then you get clean and she leaves?

I'm guessing she's probably snorting a line off some guys bare chest right now.

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my girlfriend

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I live in Alabama

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Relax bro, she's your sister, just be smooth at the next family reunion and tell her yall need to stick it out for the kids.