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re: How long should you go without having sex with your wife before something is up?
Posted on 8/11/22 at 8:57 pm to Clicker
Posted on 8/11/22 at 8:57 pm to Clicker
quote:
I’m being dramatic really. We have a good sex life. We will go a couple times a week usually, but school just started back and she’s a teacher so she’s been tired this week.
Damn you just lobbed that softball up to the plate and as expected, the responders of the OT took you deep...
0
Posted on 8/11/22 at 9:16 pm to Clicker
I think age is a factor. My refractory period has gone from 15 minutes to needing a calendar to time it.
Posted on 8/11/22 at 9:23 pm to Pettifogger
quote:
you can't let things fester I'd get suspicious after 3-4 years
Logged in only to upvote and say this has more truth than not and I’m frickin truly ‘lol’ing right now
It may end up being the most upvoted ‘forgotten’ comment in a random thread ever on here.
OUTFCKINGSTANDING sir!
This post was edited on 8/11/22 at 9:27 pm
Posted on 8/11/22 at 9:37 pm to GeauxLSUGeaux
quote:
Sex while married is like rides at Disney world. Insane wait times and only lasts 30 seconds
You should probably learn how to work the new fast pass system.
You just have to pay to move to the front of the line for each “ride”.
Posted on 8/11/22 at 9:54 pm to GetCocky11
quote:
It’s over because she continued to lie, even through 2 months of couples counseling.
11 year marriage…poof. I think she’s on vacation with the motherfricker right now actually.
Also pretty much financially drained me, but I can work back from that.
I can almost assure you that the person that she is with --- it won't last. The luster will fade in time. The newness will wear off. If she didn't fix herself with you, chances are the issues that surfaced in your marriage will continue for her. There are plenty of reasons why it won't work for her (or them), but none of that should concern you --- as difficult as that sounds. Work on you. Focus on you. Do you. Because at the end of the day, the only person you can count on is you.
Regarding counseling, if both people go in willing to admit they are part of the problem and actively work to fix it, counseling can help.
It doesn’t matter who you have as a therapist. If one person is only willing to give 50%, the other can’t give 150% to make up the difference and expect things to work out.
Or if the person goes to counseling against their will, chances are, it won't work out. That doesn't mean that you should not go to counseling - far from it. Counseling can help you become a better person. If the other person doesn't see it, doesn't want to see it, or completely wants to avoid it, let them. Don't spend your time trying to change their mind. Do you. Be you. Because if you do, you will become a better version of yourself.
This post was edited on 8/11/22 at 9:57 pm
Posted on 8/11/22 at 11:46 pm to White Bear
I work remotely. C’mon man you can better
Posted on 8/11/22 at 11:52 pm to Clicker
5 days. But I'm gone 4 days a week so....
Posted on 8/11/22 at 11:58 pm to Clicker
How tired is she? Does she work? Do you help with the babies and the house keeping? It was a long time ago but I found the more I helped with some of her work load, the better she felt at bedtime. Try doing everything she does and see how you feel at the end of the day. Think about her, more than you and she will be a different person.
Posted on 8/12/22 at 12:36 am to DontThreadOnMe
quote:
Doing chores makes it convenient for her; it doesn't create the desire. Don't forget that.
Helping with the house and kids may not create desire, but exhaustion and resentment can kill it.
And yeah-another female opinion.
Posted on 8/12/22 at 1:07 am to Clicker
My limit is 2 weeks before I default to acting like a complete a-hole to her. I’ve been as long as 6 months during a pregnancy…low point in our marriage
Posted on 8/12/22 at 1:50 am to Clicker
It’s so easy!
Start giving your wife random massages 2-3 times a week- without her having to ask for it first. It will change everything. Especially if one of her issues is fatigue, or stress; it’s likely both.
Women love massages. If I spend 20 minutes or more massaging my wife 2-3 times a week, it puts her in the greatest mood and she’s always happy to take care of me later on. And that’s important too. I don’t expect her to immediately hook me up when I’ve finished her massage; sometimes it leads to that, but it’s better when you keep the massage and the sex separate.
People make excellent points about helping out more with the chores, that’s great advice but man, women love massages and I would think that she would be so happy if you started doing that.
In my case, giving my wife these massages assures me that she’ll be glad to reciprocate and hook me up when I want some.
Start giving your wife random massages 2-3 times a week- without her having to ask for it first. It will change everything. Especially if one of her issues is fatigue, or stress; it’s likely both.
Women love massages. If I spend 20 minutes or more massaging my wife 2-3 times a week, it puts her in the greatest mood and she’s always happy to take care of me later on. And that’s important too. I don’t expect her to immediately hook me up when I’ve finished her massage; sometimes it leads to that, but it’s better when you keep the massage and the sex separate.
People make excellent points about helping out more with the chores, that’s great advice but man, women love massages and I would think that she would be so happy if you started doing that.
In my case, giving my wife these massages assures me that she’ll be glad to reciprocate and hook me up when I want some.
This post was edited on 8/12/22 at 1:52 am
Posted on 8/12/22 at 2:10 am to selfgen
I have given my wife massages for years. I want to make it hard for any man to be a better partner in life. Again, being young and raising kids is a totally new world for you both. Marriage is a journey. You bought the ticket and you are in it together as one. Treat her well and bring flowers. It is a difficult time in most marriages. Be patient.
Posted on 8/12/22 at 3:38 am to Clicker
(no message)
This post was edited on 11/7/22 at 7:30 am
Posted on 8/12/22 at 5:57 am to WestCoastAg
quote:
wouldnt that make their advice that much more valuable?
I found the second woman in this thread
Posted on 8/12/22 at 6:03 am to Clicker
quote:
How long should you go without having sex with your wife before something is up?
I got a bit suspicious when mine cut me down to once a week. But then I found out she cut two other fellas clean out so I didn't feel so bad about it
Posted on 8/12/22 at 6:09 am to FredBear
At 27 we’d frick in a broom closet if we had to. You’re in for a long sexless marriage if she’s already cutting you off. Good luck.
Posted on 8/12/22 at 6:16 am to DCtiger1
quote:
You want more sex? Do things around the house without her having to ask. Clean, cook, help with the kids. It’s like meth for a crackhead. Your sex frequency will increase
No it wont, she'll just lay her fat arse up on the couch and let you continue to do these things. While she screws the UPs driver
Posted on 8/12/22 at 6:23 am to Triple Bogey
quote:
This may sound bad, but I’ve been to the point where I’ve said, “you’re either fixing to give me some, or I’m going out to find some.”
I was drug into a "lack of sex" argument between my Brother in law and sister in law once. Told my wife this very thing in front of her family. Pretty much fricked up the rest of Christmas dinner that year.
Posted on 8/12/22 at 6:23 am to FredBear
I spit coffee reading this
Posted on 8/12/22 at 6:27 am to TDawg70
Siblings shouldn’t be fricking anyway ask the Lannisters
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