Hey, tulanelsu

Dear Friend,

The answers to your questions are found here.

Sincerely,
TulaneLSU

I can answer for him.

His father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. His mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. His father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Some times he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy, the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. His childhood was typical, summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring he’d make meat helmets. When he was insolent he was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really. At the age of 12 he received his first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved his testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking, TulaneLSU suggests you try it.

My dear Mobile ER Friend,

I walk at least 100 miles every week. I can assure you I am in peak physical condition. Don’t be fooled by easy mischaracterizations and caricatures. I am who I say I am, no imitations here.

Yours,
TulaneLSU

One difference: Ignatius was, for some reason, probably a combo of insecurity and his large intellect, cocksure and kind of sneering. This Tulane character seems a little more approachable and kind.

Also, does Tulane have a lady friend? A minx?

That is a course of course a 1970 version