GMT

Today in History: February 3

1160 Emperor Frederick Barbarossa hurtles prisoners, including children, at the Italian city of Crema, forcing its surrender.

1690 The first paper money in America is issued in the Massachusetts Bay Colony.

1908 The U.S. Supreme Court rules that union-sponsored boycotts are illegal, and applies the Sherman Antitrust Act to labor as well as capital.

1912 New U.S. football rules are set: field shortened to 100 yds.; touchdown counts six points instead of five; four downs are allowed instead of three; and the kickoff is moved from midfield to the 40 yd. line.

1944 The United States shells the Japanese homeland for the first time at Kurile Islands.

1945 The month-long Battle of Manila begins.

1966 Soviet Luna 9 achieves soft landing on the moon.

1971 OPEC decides to set oil prices without consulting buyers.

1984 The Environmental Protection Agency orders a ban on the pesticide EDB for grain products.

Born on February 3

1894 Norman Rockwell, artist and illustrator who painted scenes of small-town America. Most of his work appeared in the The Saturday Evening Post.

1907 James A. Michener, novelist (Tales of the South Pacific).

JOTD
It was getting crowded in Heaven one day, so Saint Peter decided for one day to only accept people who could make him laugh.

A man came walking up to the pearly gates and Saint Peter said to him:
“Alright bud, you’re only getting in today if you can make me laugh, so why don’t you tell me about how you died”
The man looked at Saint Peter and said
“Oh man it was awful, I was absolutely SURE my wife was having an affair, so I left work early and came home to catch her in the act! When I got home, sure as shite there she was naked in bed! I looked all over the apartment but I couldn’t find the guy anywhere so I went out onto the balcony, we live on the 25th floor, and there he was! Hanging over the edge by his fingertips! I ran inside, grabbed a hammer, and started smacking his hands and fingers with it! He finally let go and fell down 25 stories but he landed in some bushes, so I ran inside and grabbed the refrigerator and heaved it over the balcony down on top of him, crushing him and killing him! But the strain and exertion from picking up the refrigerator gave me a heart attack and I died.”
Saint Peter let out a faint chuckle, and since it was a crime of passion, he decided to let this poor soul in.
Another man came walking up to the pearly gates and Saint Peter told this man the same thing, that in order to get in he had to make St. Peter laugh. The second guy told him about how he died.
“Well St. Peter, it was awful, I was doing aerobics on the balcony of my 26th story apartment when a flock of birds came out of nowhere and startled me! I fell over the railing but managed to grab the balcony of the apartment below me. All of a sudden, some maniac came outside and started hitting my hands with a hammer until I let go! Luckily, I landed in some bushes but then this guy dropped a freaking refrigerator on me!”
Saint Peter chuckled again, let the second man into heaven, and decided he could really start to enjoy his job. A third man came walking up to the pearly gates.
Saint Peter gave his speech to this third man and then told him:
“Tell me about the day you died”
“Oh man Saint Peter you’re never gonna believe this! Alright so picture this...I’m butt naked hiding in a refrigerator...”