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Started By
Message
For OT men, do you hold emotions?
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:32 am
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:32 am
Obviously it’s uncool for men to show off their emotional side but do you think that’s healthy? I’ve been discussing the recent shootings with a friend and instead of gun control we pivoted to if emotional bursts are the reason and how men are told to hold their emotions inside and therefore more likely to burst.
Curious if anyone in the OT feels that way. I’m pretty new to this and recently doing therapy so been reading some books on it.
Curious if anyone in the OT feels that way. I’m pretty new to this and recently doing therapy so been reading some books on it.
37
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:33 am to fareplay
you have come to the right place
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:35 am to fareplay
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:35 am to fareplay
I watch Hallmark and drink 2 bottles of wine.
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:36 am to fareplay
Me? No. Most men? Probably.
For these killers, there is a definite lack of connection with other human beings. Isolation is dangerous; widespread lockdown is playing a roll in some of this.
ETA i haven’t killed anybody but if you want I can bottle up my emotions for 5 years. Come check in me then.
For these killers, there is a definite lack of connection with other human beings. Isolation is dangerous; widespread lockdown is playing a roll in some of this.
ETA i haven’t killed anybody but if you want I can bottle up my emotions for 5 years. Come check in me then.
This post was edited on 3/23/21 at 11:38 am
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:37 am to fareplay
Holding it in won't help. Talking about it at therapy will help.
I personally think that the world sometimes asks too much of people.
I personally think that the world sometimes asks too much of people.
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:37 am to fareplay
Normal Men-things are not taught in College Station
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:37 am to fareplay
Negative emotions, you bet. Nothing like a slow burning rage to motivate.
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:37 am to fareplay
I split oak for firewood with a sledge hammer and a steel wedge. Very satisfying.
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:38 am to fareplay
quote:
Curious if anyone in the OT feels that way. I’m pretty new to this and recently doing therapy so been reading some books on it.
Can you be more specific? I'm not generally John Wayne and I'm clearly more "in touch" with my emotions and show them more than my Dad did, but I'm also not one of these assholes...
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:38 am to fareplay
I am an extrovert and a conflict engager.
no. i don't hold back.
no. i don't hold back.
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:38 am to fareplay
Women say they want you to be emotionally vulnerable but they really don't.
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:38 am to JoeyJoJo
I agree. This is my 1 year wfh and went through a divorce and a move in the meantime. I can tell my mind isn’t what it used to be which is worrisome.
I’m not necessarily saying this for the women aspect but rather I feel I have gotten worse.
I’m not necessarily saying this for the women aspect but rather I feel I have gotten worse.
This post was edited on 3/23/21 at 11:40 am
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:40 am to fareplay
quote:
do you hold emotions?
I got called a robot as I was getting dumped a few months ago, so yeah
There's a delicate balance between being that and being a bitch
This post was edited on 3/23/21 at 11:43 am
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:46 am to JetsetNuggs
What’s worse? I guess what I’m trying to get at is maybe the perception of a male having to be numb or dull should be changed or emotional education should exist? I wonder if the shooters saw a therapist if anything would change
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:53 am to fareplay
Probably being a bitch.
If you don't show emotion, only women will judge you.
If you show too much emotion, both men and women will think you're weak.
From experience, I do agree men need to not bottle it up as much
If you don't show emotion, only women will judge you.
If you show too much emotion, both men and women will think you're weak.
From experience, I do agree men need to not bottle it up as much
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:55 am to fareplay
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:58 am to fareplay
I let all of my emotions out via internet message boards. Otherwise no I’m a robot.
Posted on 3/23/21 at 11:59 am to fareplay
I’d argue the opposite. Men should hold their emotions in even more.
I would argue that men have been conditioned to unload their emotions. As examples, look at so much of the entertainment programming targeted at men. The WWE is a fricking soap opera for men. Rather than just deliver combat theater, they give us emotional story lines. The same thing applies to most professional sports - they entertain us with emotional narratives. Players love to show their emotions with celebratory dances and other vocal outbursts: Real men like Barry Sanders who just do their job and leave the emotional stuff for pussies are few and far between these days. Even ESPN is all about emotion. A just the facts segment would not carry enough ratings to sustain itself as regular programming.
Go to any gym. A gym is usually full of attention whores of both sexes. But I usually see men are being much more emotional than any women there. Men get into work-out theater. So do some women, but women seem more likely to get their workout done and leave without drawing a lot of attention to themselves.
Men have been trained and conditions to externalize how they feel. If men were more like Barry Sanders, we would not be having this conversation.
I would argue that men have been conditioned to unload their emotions. As examples, look at so much of the entertainment programming targeted at men. The WWE is a fricking soap opera for men. Rather than just deliver combat theater, they give us emotional story lines. The same thing applies to most professional sports - they entertain us with emotional narratives. Players love to show their emotions with celebratory dances and other vocal outbursts: Real men like Barry Sanders who just do their job and leave the emotional stuff for pussies are few and far between these days. Even ESPN is all about emotion. A just the facts segment would not carry enough ratings to sustain itself as regular programming.
Go to any gym. A gym is usually full of attention whores of both sexes. But I usually see men are being much more emotional than any women there. Men get into work-out theater. So do some women, but women seem more likely to get their workout done and leave without drawing a lot of attention to themselves.
Men have been trained and conditions to externalize how they feel. If men were more like Barry Sanders, we would not be having this conversation.
This post was edited on 3/23/21 at 12:01 pm
Posted on 3/23/21 at 12:00 pm to fareplay
quote:
For OT men, do you hold emotions?
Not on purpose. It takes more effort and energy to show emotions. Plus the feeling usually sucks unless the emotion is laughing and happiness which I seek.
This post was edited on 3/23/21 at 12:01 pm
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