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Message
re: Divorce..what should I do?
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:23 pm to TnMountaineer
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:23 pm to TnMountaineer
There's another dude. Just move on and cut all ties permanently.
0
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:23 pm to TnMountaineer
quote:
She works at home and may leave the house once a month.
even if she's not cheating, i'm sure she's miserable.
sorry baw.
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:24 pm to TnMountaineer
quote:
There may be a Jody, maybe not.
sorry for laughing, but this line got me
she's in a dark place mentally and it sounds like shes made up her mind, unfortunately. thankfully you dont have young kids
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:24 pm to TnMountaineer
The best way to handle it is to do the right thing and live well. She might not change her mind, but there's no reason for you to not pursue happiness.
Best of luck. You'll do well.
Best of luck. You'll do well.
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:24 pm to TnMountaineer
quote:
There may be a Jody, maybe not. I’ve been looking and haven’t found anything yet. She works at home and may leave the house once a month. Even if there is there’s nothing I can do about it.
Her unwillingness to try and save things means there probably is.
In all honesty, keep things cordial at ALL costs. She's ready to move on, let her.
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:24 pm to Jcorye1
quote:
My dude, there is probably another dude.
There's ALWAYS another dude.
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:25 pm to TnMountaineer
Damn. Are you happy? Do you want to stay together?
Her unwillingness to put any effort into working it out is telling...have you asked if there is someone else?
Sorry baw. It's good your kids are older if this is the end but it will still impact them greatly.
Her unwillingness to put any effort into working it out is telling...have you asked if there is someone else?
Sorry baw. It's good your kids are older if this is the end but it will still impact them greatly.
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:25 pm to TnMountaineer
Try to divide everything without the lawyers. You’re still young enough to find love.
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:26 pm to TnMountaineer
First off, I'm sorry to say there is a better than average chance of Jody.
Secondly, it's going to get much worse before it gets better. If you are like me, I felt the need to fight to save my marriage. You will go through the stages. Look them up.
You will feel as though you will never come out on the other side, but you will and you'll be better for it.
I lost 23 pounds before I was over it.
It was the worst experience of my life and I wouldn't wish it upon my worst enemy.
Surround yourself with friends and family when possible. Get healthy, eat better, take better care of yourself and go slay some cougars. Don't get serious.
Good luck
Secondly, it's going to get much worse before it gets better. If you are like me, I felt the need to fight to save my marriage. You will go through the stages. Look them up.
You will feel as though you will never come out on the other side, but you will and you'll be better for it.
I lost 23 pounds before I was over it.
It was the worst experience of my life and I wouldn't wish it upon my worst enemy.
Surround yourself with friends and family when possible. Get healthy, eat better, take better care of yourself and go slay some cougars. Don't get serious.
Good luck
This post was edited on 1/21/21 at 1:27 pm
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:26 pm to TnMountaineer
Honestly sounds like you expected it and have moved right on to acceptance. A new lease on life at 43 really doesn't sound bad. I think in a few years you'd have no regrets. If you have doubts give her some space immediately and watch from afar. If she thinks you don't care it should be pretty evident if there's another person.
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:26 pm to TnMountaineer
If a wife says no to counseling, she's done!
Being debt free, good career and her "working at home" may all be negatives for you. She will claim she can't continue to work or that she must have the house to work. You've got no debt to split to balance off some money you will end up owing her because you have a good career.
Being debt free, good career and her "working at home" may all be negatives for you. She will claim she can't continue to work or that she must have the house to work. You've got no debt to split to balance off some money you will end up owing her because you have a good career.
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:27 pm to SUB
quote:
Damn. Are you happy? Do you want to stay together? Her unwillingness to put any effort into working it out is telling...have you asked if there is someone else? Sorry baw. It's good your kids are older if this is the end but it will still impact them greatly.
I agree. It is telling.
Am I happy? No. I haven’t been for a few months but I take my vows seriously. For better or worse. This is actually her second marriage. The kids are here from previous marriage.
I have asked. She says no. I checked phone records today. Nothing strange.
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:28 pm to TnMountaineer
She's definitely been getting the BBC for about a year now.
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:28 pm to TnMountaineer
Get out, might be the best decision of your life. For it to work, both of you would need to be trying really hard to fix the communication issues.
She is not willing to work on it. Move on
ETA: you’ll be fine. Don’t make any crazy decisions right now. Focus on yourself King
She is not willing to work on it. Move on
ETA: you’ll be fine. Don’t make any crazy decisions right now. Focus on yourself King
This post was edited on 1/21/21 at 1:30 pm
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:28 pm to geauxbrown
quote:
Surround yourself with friends and family when possible. Get healthy, eat better, take better care of yourself and go slay some cougars. Don't get serious.
Definitely doing that. Luckily I have a nice home gym I built during covid. I’m out there all the time. Rode my bike for ten miles yesterday.
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:29 pm to TnMountaineer
quote:
The kids are here from previous marriage.
So y’all don’t have any kids together?
Bounce right on out of there and go hunt chicks half your age at the beach!
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:29 pm to Boudreaux35
quote:
Being debt free, good career and her "working at home" may all be negatives for you. She will claim she can't continue to work or that she must have the house to work. You've got no debt to split to balance off some money you will end up owing her because you have a good career.
Her career is better. She makes more than me.
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:32 pm to TnMountaineer
quote:
Today - wanting to look for lawyers together.
Forget this part, If ya'll can settle it without paying a Lawyer 5K each.
Go to the courthouse or file on-line, in Texas it's $350.00
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:32 pm to TnMountaineer
quote:
Am I happy? No. I haven’t been for a few months but I take my vows seriously.
A few months isn't very long when you've been together 20 years.
quote:
The kids are here from previous marriage.
Well that could change things maybe, but I'm guessing you pretty much raised them as your own.
This post was edited on 1/21/21 at 1:33 pm
Posted on 1/21/21 at 1:33 pm to SUB
quote:
Well that could change things maybe, but I'm guessing you pretty much raised them as your own.
I have. Love them dearly. Even keeping the kids in my will.
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